TIPS: What to say... What to keep track of ... What to wear... What to wash...

There are a couple of things that you should know about the exam. Doctors perform the exam in different orders, depending on the doctor and the history elicited from you. For instance, some docs do the cardiovascular exam first, others examine your ears first; some docs do the exam by system whereas some docs do the exam starting at the head and progressing downward; and so on. If your doctor knows you well, he may simply focus the exam on parts of you that your history indicated may be out of order. Some docs don't even do pelvic exams. But whatever the case, most physicians will want to check out your heart, lungs, abdomen, and head (eyes, ears, nose, and throat) every time you visit. Although the order of the exam may differ from doctor to doctor, your doctor will likely examine you the same way each time. Why? Otherwise, she might forget something. Since docs have to see a lot of patients, efficiency is key. Thus, many MDs will ask you to change into a gown or remove your shirt ahead of time.

There are a set number of things that a doctor examines, noting what is important, regular, or irregular in the chart. Many times, what you think is weird or drastically wrong is just plain normal. I'm not saying that you shouldn't tell your doctor about such things - in fact, I would argue that you should. But don't be surprised that, in general, most of what you are is totally fine. Remember that doctors have seen hundreds of patients every week, and you've seen only you and, at best, a small number of other people. So what's out of your range is often not out of your doctor's.

KNEE JERKS

Reflexes are an important part of the physical exam. Abnormal reflexes may indicate drug toxicity, peripheral nerve disorders, or a lesion in the central nervous system (brain or CNS). Neurologists, who test reflexes more often than other specialists, often use a hammer even bigger than the one shown above.

1. Generally, it pays to limit your comments to the history part of the visit - unless your doctor is of the type to talk to you a lot (i.e., perform the history) during the exam. Talking during the exam may distract your doctor and tends to make parts of the exam difficult to perform. That's why it's good to write down your history and questions so that you don't forget anything.

2. If your doctor asks you to keep track of your blood pressure or glucose, record those religiously at home and bring the records to the doctor's office. Or you could keep a diary and bring it to the exam. This will make the exam more efficient.

3. Take a shower and brush your teeth beforehand as a courtesy to those who will be examining you.

4. Be prepared to dress in a gown. Wear clothing that is easy to remove and put back on. And don't forget: always be prepared to take out your dentures.

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I have a question regarding an occurance during a physical exam. Yesterday while visiting my Dr for a routine physical exam, he asked me to remove my shirt, then proceeded to listen to my lungs. He then asked me to lay on my back. At this point, he very, very lightly took the tip of his finger and began lightly running it from my side, just under the rib cage to the center of my stomach. Of course my stomach flinched, as this is a sensitive, somewhat ticklish area. After repeating this several times, he said "sorry, I need to check your liver" and he began the normal deeper compressions lower on my stomach. Was this feather-light touching to test my neuro response? Ive never had a DR do this before, and I must admit, I was kind of surprised. Hope someone can give me some insight!!

Thank you

pj_tucson_az@yahoo.com

-- PJ, August 2, 2002

My question concerns my annual breast exam from my primary physician. I wear the usual paper gown for the exam. I am never completely disrobed during the exam including, from the waist up.

I am only examined from one side of the table, and my doctor reaches under the paper gown, showing very little if any of my breast in the supine position. In the upright position my paper gown is not removed and he only feels around my neck area. The complete breast exam takes less than two minutes.

How do I tell my doctor (without hurting his feelings), that I think I am not getting a adequate breast exam. He has been my doctor for at least fifteen years and I am completely satisfied with him otherwise. I mentioned to him once before that I was concerned about breast cancer because two of my friends had breast cancer. One of them the mammogram missed. He offered to do another breast exam for me but did it the same way.

I know I should be more concerned about breast cancer than my doctors feelings, but he has been an excellent doctor and I would not like to lose him.

How should I handle this problem?

---

The information below was found on the Internet as to how a Adequate Breast Exam is performed.

Although sensitivity to the patient’s modesty is important, a thorough breast examination requires that the patient be completely disrobed from the waist up so that the area can be completely examined. The breast exam usually takes two minutes or less.

The examiner should have access to the patient from both sides of the examining table. Moreover, the patient should be examined in both the upright and supine positions, and sufficient time should be allowed for the examination to be conducted in an unh

ried manner.

The most frequent errors made in conducting a thorough clinical breast examination are failure to have the patient disrobe, examining the breasts only while the patient is reclining, and a rushed or hurried exam.

-- Barb, September 6, 2002

Actually, It's a time to get back to our human being awareness of our existance here as a natural living organism.

So I've never been uncomfortable, if anything I would be upset when the doctor omits a "private part" in the physical. If it's part of the anatomy the annual exam should check it.

Also the token gown is rediculous, it just gets in the way so if it's not cold nothing shoud be worn to interfere.

We're all human beings.

-- Ros, October 21, 2002

I'm a 23 year old female. Recently I've been going to the doctor and I've had a lot of uncomfort during my abdominal exam. She presses down very deep into my stomach to where i feel pain, and she listens to it for long amounts of time. I'm just wondering if anyone knows why she as to press so deep and listen to my stomach. I'm very sensitive there.

-- jen, December 7, 2002

In late 1980's,I suffered a traumatic but thought-provoking encounter with a

an m.d. During an examination to have a form filled out for Oregon State University, the physician wanted to palpate in location where I denied permission. He then became coercive and argumentative. I acquiesced but felt contaminated. He had trivialized my dignity and autonomy. I did not know his name at the time but have since tracked him down during the current year on the Internet. I don't think I have any legal recourse. I now believe that the responsibility for controlling such incidents lies with the client, to the extent of their sense of empowerment. Ordinary people can join in the feeding frenzy when physicians are taken task in public forums. I did this by writing a letter to the Editor in the 1999 case of

Ramlah Vahanvaty. A better defense, however, is an assertive attitude-to match the physician's coercion and and to demand not to be treated as an intellectual vassal. Doctors are not invincible. Fear helps keep them in check

-- carmen, December 9, 2002

I think Physician's before doing P.E. or any proceedure to their patients irregardless of gender should explain the proceedure and should established rapport with their clients, so the patient will built trust and confidence in their doctor, sad to say a lot of doctors making physical exams view it something as a daily routine. to a patient undergoing PE for the first time is often embarassing or traumatic at times. But for me I prefer a male doctor when I have my Physical Exams,for sure they understand my anatomy well and Iam not embarass to ask questions related to my health.

-- Mr.Philippines, December 16, 2002

Many people share the anger which Carmen's letter suggests. At this juncture there needs to be made a distinction between a willful humiliation and mere embarrassment. The former, I believe, is deeply imbedded and in medical education and culture. Power and control are the foundations of a physician/patient relationship. The prestige which Western civilization heaps upon medical practitioners serves patient into an almost feudal relationship (at which Carmen also hints). Patients have little recourse against culturally sanctioned emotional abuse and will have even less if tort reform legislation passes the U.S. Congress. maybe the lowly baseball bat with the threat of its use is the tool needed to bring medical personnel into line.

-- Anonymous, February 4, 2003

Hi there, I have a female doctor and I'm always to shy to be open with her even if its about my privates. How can I change? and how long should a guy get their privates checked? please help.

-- sam 22, February 13, 2003

I recently went to a new doctor for a physical. I'm a mid forties male. The exam was less than thorough, I thought.

The nurse practitoiner gave the exam ( a female). She gave a breast exam(something new to me, being a male) she looked at my skin, listened to my heart, blood pressure check, weight check, digital rectal exam,

and blood tests. there was no check of eyes, ears, throat, penis, testicles, or

reflexes. At this age should the penis and testicles still be examined, or is the risk for cancer very minimal. I'd appreciate your responses and experiences. Thanks!

Vincent

-- Vince, March 1, 2003

I was reading about everyone's different experiences. I am 26 and I have a new female doctor. Last week I went in for my first complete physical with her. She took a brief medical history and then I was asked to get competely naked and sit on the examining table with a sheet covering me. I had always been used to wearing a gown. When she came in, she looked in my ears, eyes mouth etc. Then she asked me to sit up straight and she pulled down the sheet to listen to my heart and back and then to examine my breasts. First she did a visual expection and then examined my breasts sitting up. Then when I lied down, she continued to feel around my breasts and arm pits for lumps. Even though I had checked my own breasts in the past, she wanted to watch me perform a BSE. When she examined my abdomen, she pulled the sheet right down exposing my pubic area. It was this part of the exam that I felt most exposed. Even during the pelvic exam, I felt more covered. I think gowns should be used rather than sheets for comfort.

-- grace, March 3, 2003

As a Director of a local non-profit organization many families who were involved with our organization had concerns about seeing a medical professional of the same sex. I worked closely with medical professionals for a period of seven years. Most medical professional are not sensative to the general public when it comes to this issue. I do know that most medical professionals are very careful when it comes to viewing or examining some one of the opposite sex. They have cloth and paper covers and try to be as non intrusive as possible. The typical response from doctors and nurses was I am a professional and I do not look at a person's naked body parts in an unprofessional way. I worked with 2 Chirstian Doctors in my area to educate other Doctors about running a same sex doctors office. With the rise in female docotors and male and female nurse practitioners this seemed to be a realistic alternative. All the patiences that we interviewed felt no stress. Knowing that a same sex medical professional would be seeing them. Could you give me your thoughts on this and please send me any information that you know of. Thanks

-- Amos Ramirez, October 9, 2003

Reply to Jen-

Yes, abdominal exams can be uncomfortable, especially if you are not relaxed. We are all ticklish there. The goal is to try and make your belly as soft as possible so that your doctor can feel your insides. Try putting your feet flat on the table so your knees are bent and flexing your hips a bit. Take some deep breaths in and out. Imagine that you are lying on the beach, totally relaxed and comfortable. When your doc is listening to your belly, she is listening for any decrease or increase in your bowel sounds and any possible obstruction of the abdominal blood vessels. When she lightly presses on your tummy, she is just trying to make sure that everything is soft and nontender. As she presses deeper, she is feeling for some of your organs (liver, spleen, kidneys and colon), your aorta and for any unusual masses. Just relax, you'll be fine.

-- larry, October 20, 2003

I'm in my mid 40's and go the VA Medical Center for annual physical check-ups. If you have anything that needs to be addressed you are sent to another doctor in the VA who specializes in your problem. I was scheduled to see a dermatologist who was a female and a female nurse was in the room to assist. I had to strip down to my underwear and stand there while they looked over my skin on my whole body. I then had to take my underwear down so they could check my buttocks and genital area. About this time a male doctor, the female doctor's supervisor, entered the room and while she was still checking me over he was trying to ask her out on a date. I felt this was inappropriate as this shouldn't be the time for him to be doing this.

Another time when I had to see the dermatologist it was a different female doctor and a different female nurse. Same procedure all over again and this time the nurse had to leave the room to get something and opened the door and as she went out everyone in the waiting room could see me standing there naked with the doctor checking my genitals. I don't feel most medical people look at their patients as humans, but only as objects of their work.

-- Michael, November 1, 2003

I always have the worst time when my doctor tests my reflexes on the bottoms of my feet. Normally she uses her thumb nail starting at the heel and goes up and then across the ball of my foot. I am extremely ticklish there and I laugh very hard. My foot jerks so bad that she has to hold my ankle to keep my foot still and this only makes it more intense. Now I am laughing even harder as my foot jerks against her grip. I literally can not take tickling especially on the bottoms of my feet. This is very embarrassing for me because I can not control the laughter. Even though I laugh, it's not at all fun. It is the worst form of torture. It's very confusing why I laugh so hard but HATE every minute. She tells me I need to go barefoot more because toughening the soles of my feet might help. As badly as I hate foot tickling I will try anything.

-- Lisa Holmes, December 6, 2003

re: Amos Ramirez' post about matching Patient/Doctor genders.

I have not regularly visited doctors. Within the last 30 years, the only times were for a hernia surgery, a hand infection, and a couple of stitches when I cut my palm. I am signed up now with a great HMO and decided to take advantage of a Health Evaluati0on (PE). Part one was a simple check for vitals - Ht/Wt, BP/Pulse, Eyes, Ears, EKG, and Blood Test. Removed shoes for HT/WT. and raised shirt for EKG. Exam done by two females - nurse and assistant. Part 2 was 2 weeks later. I arrived earlier than scheduled, so waiting room jitters had begun to set in when my name was called by Francine, a Nurse Practioner who introduced herself, said she would be doing my evaluation. Well, I was happy the wait was over and figured I could live through it. Went to the exam room where she took my envelope with stool samples and said she was going to the lab to check them an I sjould take off everything except my shorts, and be sure to take off my shoes and socks, and to sit on the bottom of the table and she'd be right back. She did all the upper body stuff, then checked my feet and legs (and the knee tap) She would always remark about her findings, good or bad and give me a chance to reply or discuss them. By this time, she had had her hands all over my body, and listening to and looking at things inside me, so it was only natural when she told me to lower my shorts as she was donning latex gloves. She remarked about a hernia surgery scar (from sixty years ago) We discussed my other surgeries, my tongue got twisted, and as I tried to correct myself, tongue was still twisted, so we both got a good chuckle at the words that came out. She examined my testicles, showing me how I should do it, and watched while I did the exam and told me to do it at least once a month. While she did my prostate, she gave me the good news about it, then told me she would turn in her report and get orders for blood tests,immunisations, etc, pointed out the tissues so I could clean myself and said to get dressed. When she returned, we discussed nutrition, weight control, the immunisations, the prescriptions, exercise, etc, and additional exams and blood tests I was to arrange. She made sure I understood it all!

Everyone that I have lealt with at this organization has been equally helpful and friendly, and I would like to say that the personality, including the bedside manner) of the care provider is so much more inportant to me than is the gender!

C.G.

-- curious guy, December 27, 2003

I am going to a dermatologist for the first time next week. I am going for a general "full body check" I have no idea what this entails. Could somebody give some idea of what to expect?

-- Cris, January 22, 2004

I am a seventeen yr old virgin. Due to absent periods, I feel the need to go to be examined. I have never been comfortable with doctors of any kind and feel not embarrassed, but violated whem a dentist puts his fingers in my mouth. When I talk to our family doctor I don't feel like she's listening to me. This has added to my fear of doctors. I know this appointment is nessasary, and I'm ready to do it, but am very, very scared. I am not very streched and when I did have my period, had a hard time using tampons. I am worried the pelvic exam will be painful b/c two fingers won't easily fit. Any tips on how I should act, questions to ask, or how I can stop freaking out about this? Please don't just tell me I'm being a baby, I already know that. Thanks.

-- Anonymous, January 28, 2004

hi, i want to know why the doctors test the reflexes on the bottoms of the feet. It is too torturous for me, n i laugh hysterically all through the exam. he has to hold my feet still or i will kick him... can anyone PLEASE answer my question n help me get through this?

-- Anonymous, February 4, 2004

I too find the tummy exam unconfortable and emabbarsing and find they take a long time pressing hard and want to know any more ways to relax my belly and make the muscles soft so they can feel easily.

-- Anonymous, February 14, 2004

I'm going for a physical in a month, but am worried about the abdomen exam. Can someone please give me details on what to expect & what the Dr is likely to do?

-- Smithers, February 25, 2004

I am 17 female, and i had many traumatic doctor experiences when i was a kid. I had the unfortunate problem of bed-wetting due to poor pelvic muscles, and i spent a lot of time at the doctor's office trying to get the problem fixed. Each time the procedure would be the same, and it would be both humiliating and traumatic for me. My doctors were mostly females, but there were a couple of males, and the exam would always start with me taking off my pants and panties in front of everyone. It was really degrading as a kid, and there was this once, when there were 4 intern docs in the room as well. And my doctor asked me to lie on the bed, and to hug both my legs while lying on my side. Then she would spread my vagina and do her thing and the 3 interns would be looking intently at what she was doing. She would explain what she was looking for, and ask one of the interns to hold a light to my vagina so they could 'see better'. The interns would then each get a chance to spread my vagina and examine me to find out what the problem was. i find this really humiliating, even as a kid, and i have nightmares about it till now. Although it is not really physically violating me, but it is visually violating my privacy. And the male doctors get to probe me even as interns. Is it fair for a kid to undergo such exams?

-- Anonymous, March 7, 2004

Yeah, I agree with you guys about the abdominal exam. I just went for a physical and although I was kind of able to keep my belly relaxed, I had a smile from embarresment on my face the whole time. My doctor was really thorough with my belly, more so than my last one. She put her cold steth on my tummy, giving me goosebumps and thumped up and down on both sides, something about my liver and spleen. When she started to feel, she had to remind me to relax and she asked me to bend my knees. She felt quickly all over and then started to press really deep with both hands, spending lots of time pprodding around my navel and below. SHe further embarressed me by saying that I was "so thin" and that she could "feel everything in there", including my liver, colon, kidney and other stuff. she even commented on my piercing! i was almost glad when she moved on to my pelvic and covered my shivering belly, but of course, more prodding to come.

-- christine, March 31, 2004

I'm a 32 year old male.I was just wanted to know if what I experienced in an exam would be within the realm of what was normal. It happened years ago, when I was a teenager. Since then I have this huge anxiety about doctors so I just basically don't go. Anyway, I was getting a physical exam, my first one. I didn't have to undress at all except for my shirt. When it came time for him to examine below my navel ( I was lying down)HE undid my belt and jeans and then pulled my jeans down to my ankles. He even asked me to hop down off of the table which was very hard with my ankles bound by my jeans. I didn't know if this type thing was something common or just something old country doctors did.

-- Steven, April 18, 2004

I am 61 years old female. My yearly physical exam takes 3 visits. The first visit, my doctor talks about what he intends to do, takes by BP, bone density test, ekg, weighs me, writes prescriptions for a year and gives me a form to take to a local lab for blood work. He gives me a 3 page questionnaire about myself to bring back on visit 2.

Visit 2 consist of the actual physical, eyes, ears, throat, reflexes, heart, pap smear, breast exam, blood work, urinealysis. We talk about the questionnaire comparing it to the year before. We discuss my family history and my own family. He take more blood to send off to a lab out of state for the cholesterol check and tells me it is more accurate than the local lab.

Visit 3 we will go over the test he has performed, blood work, ekg, etc. and the physical.

He has indicated he wants blood work for an out of state lab to see what vitamin deficiencies I might have and then I would have to buy the vitamins through him and the lab where he reaps the profit.

Three months coming up he wants me to have an echogram and the machine will be brought into his office for the list of people on his physical list.

What I am asking is why all the visits and is this the normal procedure for a family practioner? I very seldom see more than one or two patients in the waiting room and never children. Is this preventive medicine?

-- C Browne, April 26, 2004

I am a 40 year old male. I think that those that work in the Medical profession should understand that all people may feel differently about using an opposite gender caregiver. I personally hate taking my pants off with females in the room during any kind of medical procedure or exam. I know that they say they are professionals, but it is my body and my money. What I am comfortable with shoud be very important to them, but I have seen medical professionals just try to push it on through with me saying I am uneasy. I am sure that some men prefer to have females taking care of their medical needs, but I don't.

Allen

-- Anonymous, June 4, 2004

As as practicing Family Physician, reading the posts to this site, I see a lot of deference and even fear.

However in some of the letters there

is unabashed anger... Do our patients hate us that much? My career began in the dark ages (1960's) when patients "knew their place" and seldom challenged MD's. I've always tried to be respectful of my patients but maybe I should beware

reprisals from somene I may have slighted 15, 20 or more years ago.

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2004

I have a question about sports physical privacy. I'm a senior in high school and had my sports physical at the gym at our school, along with about 125 male athletes on a tuesday evening. Us guys stripped to our shorts in the locker room and came into the gym and lined up against the wall.

Each guy had his vitals taken, blood pressure, temperature, weight & height by a nurse. Then we lined up to see the doctor. The doctor was set up in the corner of the gym, not in a room or with any partition or drapes for privacy. The doctor looked at out eyes, ears, asked a questions. Then we were asked to remove our shorts and he did a hernia check (no DREs thank God). Finally he did a full body skin check for skin abnomalites like rashes or sores. All in view of all the other guys in line and anybody in the gym.

The problem us guys had with this was the openess in which the hernia and skin checks were done. The principal and vice principal, a female amd male, were present in the gym during the physical. The P.E. instructors came into the gym, 2 males, 1 female. A representative of the HMO that insures the school district, a female, was present. Not to mention the 4 nurses.

My dad called the principal about this and was told the doctor was responsible. My dad got a hold of the doctor and was told the school was responsible. It was the old pass the buck.

Can somebody tell me, are there any guidelines that govern sports physicals that both school & doctors must abide by? Or is it because its male athletes that the issue of privacy is mute.

Thanks people. Sheppard

-- Sheppard, June 27, 2004

hey guys! anymore advice about the belly exam would be great! Is it poss for them to feel through your t-shirt and even perhaps sitting up? it would be less uncomfortable this way? and not to have their cold hands pressing on your belly would be a relief!!

-- Anonymous, July 8, 2004

I wanted to bring up an issue that happened to me five years ago. At the time I was a 41 year old female with family history early and sudden heart attacks (my father died at age 44). I had been experiencing high blood pressure and some chest pain on exertion(which was later determined to be asthma). I had the stress test and nuclear scan which revealed a possible problem. Well to make a long story short I was sent to cardilogist and had a cathterization. The whole procedure was very demeaning. The shaving of my pubic area while completely exposed to male nurses and doctor. When I was asked to get on the table they just grabbed my gown and pulled it off and laid me on the table for all to see while a nurse shaved my groin/pubic area more than one nurse had already done. I don't think I would have had a problem with this if it had been done in front of female nurse only but there were two male RN's and my cardiologist looking on. I heard them make some remark about my modesty when I complained and my large breasts. The cardiologist never warned me when he was injecting the xylocaine to numb me--that was the worst it stung like a bee sting. My heart rate went up sky high during the procedure ( I later found out I am allergic to shellfish and was probably reacting to the dye). Well the test was fine and showed my heart to be great shape. What I was experiencing was most likely related to my allergies and asthma. The doctor kind of laughed when he said my heart was in great shape and the problems seen on the scans was because I had a large chest (I am a 40DD). He tried to make light of it which was okay but I heard him and the two male nurses talking about my large breasts. One of them said I'd love to give her an EKG! I have never been so embarrassed in all my life. I never knew my breasts were such a problem or fascination. My husband and mother-in-law said the doctor told him all was fine when I was in recovery. He never said it was because of my large chest. I mentioned all of this to my internist's nurse practitioner and she said she was so sorry I had that endure that. I now only go to female doctors or NP's because of all this because my internist wasn't very empathetic either. When I finally told my husband about this I was in tears. I finally realized why for all these years men and boys would get all excited when I'd bend over or run! But I sure didn't like them making jokes in this setting or ripping my gown off. It was if they were getting into the dominance thing. It really bothered me because I worked as a nurse's aide for 25 years and I always repected my patients modesty to be exposed.

-- Erin, July 15, 2004

Many of the posts I'm reading here have done a better-than-fair job of documenting the appalling arrogance of today's medical establishment, something that's been evident to me for decades.

My wife and I recently left a doctor we'd been seeing faithfully for years because he brought some wet-behind-the-ears med student into the exam room without first asking her (my wife was the patient on that particular visit).

Now I'm reading that some doctors are allowing drug company salespeople to enter exam rooms and watch even the most intimate of examinations, a scenario that clearly serves only the drug rep, who enjoys additional "face time" with doctors to whom their trying to peddle there goods. If that were ever done to me, I would make that day the very worst of the doctor's medical career; I might even challenge his license.

As you may have already guessed, I visit doctors very rarely, and then only if I'm having symtoms. Hardcore fans of preventive medicine might accuse me of playing Russian Roulette with my health because I won't submit to degrading physical exams nine times a year. Yeah...maybe. But I would remind you that some of our prominent forefathers---Ben Franklin, George Washington, Daniel Boone and his lesser-known brother Squire Boone---and a GREAT many others, lived well into their seventies and longer in an era when there was no medical science to speak of. And here's a startling truth that doctors don't want you to know: although the INFANT mortality rate was extremely high in those days, the truth is that most who survived thru ages eight or nine went on to live very nearly as long as we do today. And very few ever got their scrotums squeezed or vaginas probed---well, at least by doctors.

But in those rare occasions when I do visit a doctor's office, there are some rules that WILL be observed:

1)Only the doctor is permitted to examine me; there's no reason for nine other people of both sexes to be present.

2) There is NO opening the exam room door and chatting with office employees, etc., while I'm in ANY state of undress.

3) In the extremely rare occasions where I would submit to a below-the-waist exam, ONLY same-sex practicioners will perform the exam, keeping rules #1 and 2 firmly in mind. I DO NOT allow women to examine those areas, and never will

If healthcare providers don't wish to respect my feelings on this matter, I'll find new ones. There are more than 30 pages of doctors in the phone book where I live; I'm sure I can find one or two whose sensitivity might actually eclipse his arrogance.

-- Roderick, August 7, 2004

To Sheppard: Re your June 27th post about taking a physical at your school, and everybody who just happens to work there being allowed to watch; the fact that both parties (doctor and school) pointed fingers at each other is an admission right there that something terribly wrong was done to you. I mean, if they're blaming each other, then obviously there's blame to go around.

Your school is guilty of a serious breech of good judgment, AT BEST.

Sheppard, PLEASE click on my E-mail link and acknowledge that you saw my post. I can't take back what was done, but I believe I can make the responsible parties answer for what they've done to you and your team mates.

I believe I can bring some much-deserved grief to them, and much-needed closure to you.

Help is on the way! Please click on my name below and E-mail me directly. I encourage anyone else who has had similar experiences to do so as well.

Thanks!

-- Joe S., August 7, 2004

I am a female. I took the physical exam about 3 yr. ago. I forgot what was it like,now i have to take it again. Sometimes I just want to be a man. You know, being topless. just worrying about the downward part.

thanxs for reading.

-- Sharon, August 20, 2004

Just a casual observation of frequent complaints,

There appear to be quite a few of people out here who think medical professionals are born and not made. As a hazmat technician, I’m required to get frequent physical exams and I’m not bothered in the slightest by having “extra people” in the room. The doctors and nurses of tomorrow are MADE today. Personally, I am honored to be involved in the learning process and I know that the experience gained by working with me will go on to benefit an untold number of people in the future.

As far as embarrassment during an exam: do you really think that you’ve got anything which medical professionals haven’t seen before?? Even with pierced nipples, I have never gotten a smirk or unprofessional comment from ANYONE. I’m a firm believer that any perceived “embarrassment” is completely self-inflicted. In the words of The Godfather: “It's not personal, Sonny; It's strictly business.”

There's my two cents and I wish ya'll the best!

-- Joe B., August 21, 2004

i went to a new doctor the other day

when i was in the exam room the nurse told me to disrobe and put on this paper gown and sit on the table when the doctor came in we got on with the exam he started with the breast exam tearing the top of the gown to expose my breasts then tore the gown more to examine my stomach area when he did the pelvic my breasts were still exposed because the gown was ripped so far down then he made me get off the table and move around to the side of the table and bend over with my elboes on the edge of the table he inserted his fingers in my anus and vagina at the same time and from where he was standing he could see my breasts hanging because the gown had slid down my arms and wasnt covering anything this part of the exam took awhile he said he was checking for lumps or anything in the wall between the two openings is this normal i have never had this type of experience before

-- Anonymous, August 26, 2004

I NEVER FORGOT WHEN I WENT TO THE UROLIGIST FOR A BLADDER INFECTION HE MADE ME DROP MY SHORTS AND UNDERWEAR HE THEN EXAMINED MY GENITALS AND DID A DRE HE THEN OPENED THE DOOR BEFORE I PULLED MY SHORTS AND UNDERWEAR UP ANOTHER FEMALE PATIENT WAS WALKING BY THE DOOR AND SAW ME TOTALY NAKED I WAS NEVER SO HUMILIATED IN MY LIFE

-- TONY, August 29, 2004

I am a 20 year old female and have been getting my "annual exam" since I was 12. 8 months ago, the OBGYN I had been going to for all those years resigned. It was in my best interest, I felt, to continue my exams with my family practitioner rather than going through all the hassle of finding a new doctor for this year. Now, my regular doctor is a very nice man. He has always treated me with the utmost respect and been very honest about all of my exams. When I went to him for my "annual", I was trusting that he would treat me the same way he always had. However, he didn't walk me through the exam (as should always be done, no matter how many times you've been through it). The OBGYN I had been going to before, always explained exactly what he was about to do, so that I would be prepared (no surprises). With this exam, nothing was a surprise...at first. He checked my vitals, did a breast exam, and did the usual pelvic, but then caught me off guard with a rectal exam. Never before have I experienced that magnitude of pain. It was demeaning and awful to experience for the first time. The worst part about it was that he didn't prepare me for it. When he was finished with the pelvic, I was beginning to sit up, and then it happened. He then had the nerve to tell me to relax. When he left the room so that I could dress, I overheard him outside the exam room door talking with the nurses about me. He told them that I was a "first-timer" and that "it was funny because I was caught off-guard". I didn't at all find it amusing.

I was just wondering if anyone else had experienced this sort of behavior before. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I might do, if anything?

-- C J, August 29, 2004

I took an exam today - I'm 44, over weight etc. I felt the doc was in a huge rush - he didn't take any blood, just a urine sample - didn't do an EKG - or suggest a stress test. I actually felt he was rushed and running behind and was half way out the door - I am tempted to get another exam - am I paranoid?

Thanks

-- S, September 7, 2004

This is a reply to Sheppard, concerning the sports physical in the gym.

I read your post and understand your humiliation, I felt the same way too when I went through a simuliar group physical. What I learned is that when playing sports there will be times that you must be nude in front of strangers & females.

When I wrestled during college, before a tournement all wrestlers are weighed and subjected to a full bodied skin check. During a skin check an athlete stands nude with arms away from the body and a doctor inspects his body for rashes, sores or any abnormality. This is usually done in the locker room. Even though the rules state that weigh ins and skin checks are done in private with only wrestlers, coaches and tournement officials present that was rarely the case. While us wrestlers are lined up waiting to be weighed and checked out by a doctor, people always seemed to wander into the locker room. School alumni, faculity members, dads, etc. A couple of times med-students (some females) studying dermotology would be allowed to observe the doctor conduct skin checks on us wrestlers, nobody ever asked us if it would be okay or if we mind.

My advice to you is to put aside the humiliation you feel and focus upon the benefits you gain from competing in sports. Stuff like traveling, making friends, descipline, learning to compete, etc.

Take care & the best of luck.

-- Paduca, Kentucky, September 9, 2004

To Sheppard re June 27, 2004 post:

It is absolutely outrageous that your privacy, and that of the other male athletes undergoing physical exams at your high school, was so egregiously violated by allowing the presence of female "spectators." Would your school have subjected female atheletes to a physical exam in the presence of male observers? I wonder whether or not the females present (including the female from the insurance company, the female principal and the female P.E. instructor) would be offended by having men in the same room while they are asked to spread their legs for the insertion of a speculum into their vagina for a gynecological exam. Males undergoing physical examination are certainly entitled to as much privacy as females undergoing physical examination. The lack of respect for men's privacy and dignity, as exemplified by the Abu Ghraib prison abuses, has no proper place in any school in the United States of America. No male student should ever have to undergo such embarrassment, humiliation and degradation as you did. Your complaint raises serious privacy and gender discrmination issues. In my judgment, the school, in particular, ought to be held fully accountable through legal action. I would very much like to know the name of your high school and school district. I would be more than happy to express my views directly to them.

-- Larry, September 15, 2004

To the author of the Paduccah KY post, responding to Sheppard (June 27), I simply cannot believe that you actually accept the public display of male athletes' naked bodies to irrevelent female onlookers! Maybe there are certain realities inherent to school athletics, whereupon one's comfort zone is occasionally breeched, but that shouldn't translate to "anything goes."

Larry's post (September 15) on the same subject was right on the mark, especially where the double standard was concerned: I challenge you or anyone else to document ONE SINGLE INSTANCE when a row of 90% naked females had to stand in line and wait to be told to become 100% naked, in plain eyeshot of male faculty or students---even med students. Doesn't happen, bub!

And if some measurable regard for human dignity is practiceable when females are naked, then there's no reason why the reverse shouldn't be true. I do agree with you, however, that the dehuminization that you and Sheppard described is probably fairly common in the case of male athletes. But I submit that the only reason it got that way is because people like--well, YOU---have tolerated it, and thereby helped to lower the dignity factor for everyone else.

If male atheletes demand better treatment, they'll get better treatment. If, on the other hand they merely roll over and accept it, it's only going to get worse.

Joe

-- Joe, September 21, 2004

I am a 15 yr. old female. I went to the Dr. last week because my stomach had been bothering me. The nures took me into the exam room and had me change into a gown (I was able to leave my underwear on). The Dr. then came in and asked me some questions. Then the Dr. had my lie down on the table so she could feel my stomach. After this she had me stand up and lean over the table. I didn't know what to expect. I heard the Dr. doing things behind me and started to get really nervous. Without warning the Dr. came up behind me, pushed the gown to the side, and pulled my underwear down to my knees. She then spread my cheeks and rubbed some stuff on. Then she stuck her finger in so far it hurt. Has this ever happened to anyone else? I just went because my stomach hurt. This was completely unexpected.

-- Crystal, October 1, 2004

I take strong exception to the post

from Paduca(h) and stand with folk of

both sexes (gender is a grammitical term) who have realized they have a

right to respect for their dignity and to servere punishment for humiliation!

Complicity of "U.S. Army doctors" in abuse at Abu Ghraib (as reported the Lancet) demonstrates trust in physicians

and respect for them are quaint outmoded ideas.

-- Stojan, October 4, 2004

re: Lisa Holmes

I know exactly what you mean about being "tickle tortured" on the soles of your feet during examinations. I was involved in a serious automobile accident in my early 20's, and afterwords was under the treatment of a neurologist who seemed to delight in "tickle-testing the sensation" of my bare feet and toes. I've always been extremely ticklish, and it was sheer torture to endure. I was soooh embarrassed to burst out giggling laughing uncontrollaby as my bare soles and toes were poked and stroked, but there was no way to avoid it (I tried everything).

FYI- about toughening your feet by walking barefoot outside. I go barefoot all the time, and am still too ticklish to withstand those tickly foot exams....it doesn't work, at least not for me.

-- Becky in Georgia, October 4, 2004

I remember back in 9th grade all the boys got called down the locker room for a physical. All the boys were told to take off our clothes to our underwear for a physical. We had no clue we were getting one untill they called us to the locker room. And of course there were a few women present. No privacy for us boys. I was shy at that age (14) but that time I actually put my foot down, told the female school nurse I was not getting a physical from them seeing as my doctor gave one. My coach was there and he let me use the phone to call my mom. She wasn't informed about any physical at the school. Needless to say I never got one at school that day.

I suggest that we tell our boys/sons that they do not need to give in to such things if they feel uncomfortable with it.

Tell the schools that if they want to give our sons (and daughters) physicals that:

a) They need parental permission first.

b) State "exactly" what will be done during the exam

c) to show the dignity and respect to the boys as they show the girls

-- frank, October 4, 2004

for my annual well woman exam I find that I am less embarrassed and that sex is elminated as a factor when I go to a woman doctor. Also, I don't feel as exposed and as "dirty" after the exam. Do others feel the same way?

-- Chris, October 7, 2004

when i was young i was sexually abused (about 8 years old) so i had to go in and get a physical exam, the doctor made me go on my hands and knees while she spread apart my vagina and did her thing. I have never been so humiliated in my life as a child. I was like tramatized and then she did something where it really really hurt and I still don't know what she did. has this happened to anyone else?

-- Anonymous, October 13, 2004

my wife had a papsmear appointment and asked that i go with her. She speaks little english and wanted me to translate for her. The nurse called her into the room and asked me to wait in the waiting room, i told her that my wife wanted me in the exam room to translate for her and besides she felt uncomfortable in there by herself with the nurse and doctor. The nurse looked very bothered with it and allowed me to stay, only after my wife insistsed on it.

Is there some rule in the doctor's office that says that the spouse in not permitted in the room during the exam?

-- Anonymous, October 20, 2004

Reply to Anonymous, the 17 y.o virgin going for a first time exam.

I'm 19, and still a virgin, and I had to go get an exam done for the same reason, missed periods. I'm not going to lie to you, the pelvic exam DOES hurt. I'd be setting you up for big time disappointment if I said it didn't. It's not AWFUL though. I highly suggest taking someone supportive with you. I had a very wonderful nurse who held my hand through the entire thing, and even though she was a complete stranger, it made a world of difference.

Please, whatever you do, DO NOT IGNORE YOUR MISSED PERIODS! I don't want to freak you out, but I went for the same reason, and it turns out I have something called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. It's hard to explain, but if it isn't taken care of you can be at higher risks for heart disease, stroke, uteran cancer (sp?), and may have difficulty if you ever want to have children. This is especially important if you happen to be overweight as well. Please don't be too afraid to make an appointment. It's very important that you don't ignore this. The pelvic exam does hurt if you haven't had sex, but explain to your doctor that you're a virgin and it's uncomfortable for you to even use tampons. My doctor was very gentle when I explained this to him. It's a very short examination assuming you don't have any infections or anything. Best of luck and please don't be too worried!! You're going to have to get in done eventually. Don't procrastinate and maybe have bigger problems later!! Good Luck!!!

-- Anonymous, October 23, 2004

I think that the problem with a lot of people is the fact that America is too uptight about the human body in general. After reading these messages, I can see many people's points if they do feel embarressed about being undressed in front of a lot of people, whether doctors or onlookers. I'm a male and personally prefer women doctors since I am always uncomfortable with a man, even a doctor,probing everywhere on me. I've always been comfortable with women. I don't believe in the modesty between men and women at all,and I'm not looking at this from a viewpoint that's sexual but just that the human body is beautiful and natural, no matter what that person looks like at all. I happen to believe in Nudism where shame doesn't exist, including with a woman's chest which is no big deal to see if one looks at it as more natural and not so much as a sex object. Those who literary humiliate highschool boys like that large physical in the gym without their conscent should be dealt with, but in truth and with adults, America is so damn uptight with the human body and nudity it is truly pathetic on that subject! There is such a thing as dignity but there is no such thing as losing one's dignity over harmless nudity with both sexes. That's the way were born and that's the way we were truly meant to be, so uptight people have got to get real and appreciate the beauty of the human body of both men and women.

-- Ross, October 27, 2004, October 27, 2004

I am a 40 yr old male. I get a physical exam every 2-3 years. My past 4 exams have been with one Nurse Practitioner, two Family Physicians, and one Physician Assistant. All these professionals were women. In all cases I got either semi-erect or fully erect during some part of the exam. (With the obvious embarrassment that comes with it) Next January, I have my first DME with my PA, also a woman. I asked her this past summer during a BP checkup what she would do or what I should do if I got an erection during the DME or any part of the exam? Her response was, "have you had an anal exam before?" I replied no and she said 'oh'. Nothing more was said. Can any medical professional scanning these entries make a comment? Thank you in advance.

-- Derek, October 29, 2004

I am a 33 year old black woman from East Africa. During the last few months I've been feeling pressure in my perineum (area between my vulva and anus).

After seeing a urologist, and checking for other symptoms the doctor did a rectal exam and said that I had pelvic floor muscle trigger points and I needed to see a physical therapist who specializes in this area.

The physical therapist did a full body analysis and confirmed the diagnosis of the urologist.

To help reduce this chronic pain, I was given exercises and stretching to do.

The other weekly treatment was to come in for "internal work." The therapist explained that my pelvic muscles needed massaging from the inside. To do this, he had me get into a gown and I would lay on my side. He would then gently insert one or two fingers in my rectum and massage different parts of my pelvic floor for about ten minutes. He would then change gloves, have me lay on my back and put a pillow under my pelvis. Once again, he would insert two fingers inside my vagina and massage my pelvic floor for about ten minutes.

At first the procedue was quite embarassing and the anal massage was uncomfortable but I found that if I relaxed it was very helpful. He physical therapist was very professional and always treated me with respect although I was in the most uncompromising positions.

I've been having weekly work for about two months and my condition has improved greatly.

Jeannie

-- Jeannie, October 29, 2004

I had to go to see my doctor (a male) coz I had some pain in my stomach. I was wearing a tee shirt but I had forgotten to put on a bra, I was lying on the exam couch and the doctor started to lift my tee shirt up and then he lifted too high and my breasts came out. Then I realised I had no bra,,,,the doctor was smiling at me and he was just touching my chest and stomach. then I said "oh that tickles" he looked at my face and said "that tickles does it?' as he felt around some more. I didnt mind it but he was smiling a lot.

-- Mei, November 1, 2004

My 19 year old son took a job this summer as a lifeguard at a posh country club near Palm Springs. Him and 7 other guys monitored the pool and taught children of members how to swim.

In order the get the the job, besides having gone through lifeguard training, all the 8 guys had to agree to a full bodied skin check every month, to make sure nobody had open sores or rashes. There is a female nurse practitioner also employed at the country club who performs the skin checks. My son was told its a precaution since the lifeguards come in physical contact with the children and to maintain the cleanliness of the pool.

My son tells me how embarassed him and the other guys were having to see this nurse everyday at work, after having to be nude during the skin checks.

What is the standard procedure for a workplace situation like this?

-- Jobim H., November 3, 2004

First off: To the doctor that posted about patients "Knowing Their Place." Who the Hell do you think YOU are? The patients are the boss in the examining room, unless it's an emergency, then they only have two choices: Conform or Die.

Second off: If you're standing in an examing room naked and someone is about to leave or enter, you make sure you have something to cover up with. I never really heard of an examing room being adjacent the waiting room anyway, unless it is a private practice in a home. There, you may find this kind of setting and, once again, you must be aware of your surroundings, and so should the caretaker.

-- PJ, November 7, 2004

I am a 32yr old female. After having 2 children the annual exam is not all that bad. There is a little embarrasment just because you feel so vulnerable in that position. I also beleive that doctors (both male and female) should ask the patient her preference about a chaperone. I feel quit comfortable with my male docor but would prefer to be asked if I want a chaperone. I have never vocalized this to my doctor becasue I understand that the chaperone is there for his protection.

-- Anonymous, November 17, 2004

This is a reply to the guy who wrote that he went to the gynocologist with his wife for her yearly exam. I go with my wife for her yearly exams and none of her doctors have ever had any problems with me being there and it makes my wife feel better to have me with her, so I feel if her doctor has a problem with it maybe find another doctor because if it bothers them for for you to be in the room they are probably not in the right state of mind to be doing this kind of work. IT IS NOTHING SEXUAL. If the doctor does'nt understand this find a new doctor.

-- Joe, November 22, 2004

I am a 23 yr old female and I recently moved to a new town. I had to get a new family doctor and new OBGYN. I visited with my family doctor for my annual physical and the nurse checked all my vitals. She then left the room and asked that I get undressed with the exception of bra/panties and put a gown on. I never had to get undressed for a physical and was taken by surprise. The DR returned and performed the physical (including a breast exam that I did not know was going to happen). Prior to starting, he noticed that I didn't remove my bra and then turned around while I did...is this normal for the doctor to stay while removing clothing??

-- B, November 22, 2004

I am a girl(17 years old).Yesterday I went to a doctor for my first phisical.Everything was okay until he say that got underes and he have to make a rectel exam.so ı stood up for rectal cheeck he push his two fingers in to my anus and then he said than he have to use with endoscope.he took a large thing but at first ı couldn't understood that it would enter in me.after he toll thet he coult see in me only with it.and then he started to push it into my anus but endocam was too large for me and it was very painful because ı werent lubriciated and ı started to cry.but notting change it was in me and ı was in a great pain.have you ever been in this case?please replay this.

-- derya aydan, November 28, 2004

My boyfriend just had a physical exam in order to compete in a martial arts competition. He is 17 and a half years old, since he is still a minor there had to be a chaperone in the room. The doctor called in one of the ladies working at the front desk to be present during the exam. My boyfriend said he felt uneasy about this women being there during the whole, complete exam. Who it turns out is not a nurse but just a clerk. My boyfriend, who just left a religious commune in Utah, is not used to questioning a figure of authority. Should the doctor have asked my boyfriend permission for the other person to be present during the exam? What should my boyfriend do now: file a complaint? just forget the whole thing?

-- Hannah, November 30, 2004

At my school in Europe the year started with a combined medical and physical exam that was conducted enmasse. Everyone went to the locker room, stripped to their underwear and walked to the gym a short distance away. Once inside, you put your bra and knickers into a numbered paper bag and gave it to a teacher. Spending about 3 hours completely naked with many strangers present felt strange the first time, but the presence of my friends made it less so.

Certainly, I never felt any need to cover myself whet most of the people in the gym were also nude. I remember checking the other girls out and comparing myself with them. The boys went through the same procedure on a different day. It was probably alot easier for them to pee into the cup!

ps. A teacher also marked a number on our shoulders

-- Astrid, December 15, 2004

I am a middle-aged male who was advised to have periodic "head-to-toe" dermatological checks because of a family history of skin cancer. I have had a couple of these, one by a female and one by a male dermatologist. In each case the exam was done while I was standing up and wearing undershorts. The doctor would have to bend over to check my legs or feet. In both cases, the doctor pulled the top of my shorts out and glanced down the front and back very briefly.

I am assuming that the main point of such a "thorough" examination is early detection of possible cancer, particularly the deadly melanoma. In both instances, I noticed that there was an exam table in the room and a very powerful light above it (presumably used during in-office surgery). Given the potential consequences of missing something, wouldn't it make more sense to have the patient lie nude on the table and use the light to examine every square inch of the body? This would also allow the doctor to have everything more at eye level and facilitate a more comprehensive examination. I am personally more than willing to compromise modesty if it will contribute to saving my life.

-- Anonymous, December 20, 2004

I realize male doctors are professional and see women in the nude all the time, but that still doesn't soothe my anger about a recent exam by fiance had.

She's 19 and needed to have a pelvic exam for birth control pills. I drove her to the doctor's office and was quite upset knowing another man would be seeing her naked and doing who knows what. I wasn't sure procedures were used during a pelvic exam but I feared the doctor would be feeling my girl's private parts.

She seemed quite upset after the exam and I coaxed her into telling me what happened and what the problem was.

It turns out this short, fat, bald sleaze bag of a doctor had her naked from the waist down and spread-eagled on the exam table as he probed her vagina and rectum. She said he even examined her clitoris. That really set me off. Was that really necessary?

-- Ned, December 21, 2004

I agree with Ross. All of this embarrassment about our bodies is entirely a cultural construct. It is possible to reject such irrational feelings and worry about things that really matter. Worry about the state of your health that the doctor is trying to ascertain. Disease can hurt you -- taking off your clothes cannot. Of course, I am not excusing any caregiver who purposely degrades or abuses a patient for his or her own entertainment. But why not be proud of your body instead of being ashamed of it? A change of attitude about this would save many of you a lot of grief. Try to reject some of the irrational things we've been taught in this society.

Fred

-- Anonymous, December 24, 2004

I was at a doctor's office far a drainage infection their three girls in the waiting room. One of the girls asked her mother what the doctor was going to do and she said that the doctor was going to make her take off all her clothes. I was called and they put me in a room nextdoor to two rooms on either side and one behind the back wall. Well I heard door close to the back room and the doctor told to take off all her clothes even her socks bra an panties. On the right he told to take off her dress, shoes, Slip, pantihose, bra and panties. The left he told her to take off her shirt, blouse, shoes, slip, stockings, bra, and panties. I never was tod to undress and that makes fortunate.

-- Anonymous, December 30, 2004

I went thru the group phisicals when inducted into the Army and it was a sad thing for me,,here must have been 50 guys lined up like tin sodiers totally naked and getting a pgysical...I was glad when that was over...it did make me apprehensive in the future when Seeing doctors, what they call the white coat syndrome.

I went to my regula doctor once and for the first time he surprised me with a female PA and she just came in and said she was doing the examination, I had no warning from my regular doctor who I am no longer with... I may have been a little better off if he had told me about her coming in but since it kind of caught me off guard I did not let her do any of the exposure exaMS AND SHE ACTUALLY understood and skipped them ....

He caught me the next time around and did not have the PA there then.

Guess every one is different when it comes to being in the dr.s office as most is not knowing hwta to expect and wondering if the docotrs are followibng their strict oath,,By reading some of these stories they are not..

GAry

-- Gary, December 31, 2004

More women would get mamograms if they could have someone with them. They say there is;t much radiation in a mamogram so someone there for support would help.

-- Harold, January 6, 2005

I partly disagree w/Fred. The need for

dignity is common to all human cultures.

Any action by professionals with the goal to humiliate, coerce or belittle

must be dealt with as a sexual crime in an office or especially in an institutional setting. I would like to read a good reason for sparing the careers of these micreants.

-- Anwar, January 14, 2005

I am 18 yr old girl and I think guys who think nudity is no big deal or privacy is not important doesnt know what a woman feels. We come to accept what we cannot change, but we dont appreciate the often cruel manner in which we are treated.

One time they wouldnt let my boyfriend be with me even though I was to get a pelvic exam. so we left.

We arent talking nudism. we are talking about exposing our genitals in a medical setting.

-- Felicia, January 29, 2005

I am a very health 33 year old male and recently I went in to see my doc for a physical... it was over two years since my last. Before he came in to see me the nurse had me put on a gown and told me i could leave my underwear on.

so the doc asked me a couple questions, none about my sex life and then came the physical exam.

he checked my head stuff first and then lungs next. then he had me lay down on my back. he put a modesty sheet over me to cover from my waste down when he checked my abdomen. mind you i already had my underwear on. then when it came time for the genital exam, with the sheet still over the area, he had me pull my underwear down. then he reached under and did a quick testicle exam. and then i was told to get dressed and that everything was fine.

so i'm writing because that seems terribly incomplete. shouldn't a doctor be more concerned about finding some abnormality than a person's modesty? i used to think he was a good doc but now i am having my doubts. am i missing something here?

justin-

-- justin, February 3, 2005

i have been going to the same female doctor for a number of years.i feel like a fool wearing the gown.any advise on how to tell the nurse or doctor that i really feel more comfortable with no gown?

-- curious, February 3, 2005

i have been going to the same family doctor for 8-9yrs.[female] i am a58 yr old male.i have always felt uncomfortable wearing a gown.is it a law or is there some way i could make it known to her how it makes me feel.she is about the same age as me and not that good looking .so it is not a turn on or anything like that.

-- jake, February 7, 2005

during a vaginal exam does a medical assistant need to be present for years one has always been in the room and recently i went to a new doctor and there was not one .

-- Anonymous, February 15, 2005

I'm doing a research paper on humiliating medical experiences with the focus on trauma from such experiences.

Please E mail me if anyone is having difficulties based on an experience they have had.

Thanks!

-- Marjorie, February 16, 2005

This is in response to Peducah, Kentucky, Sept. 9, 2004 message.

I could not agree with you more about letting go of this modesty BS. Guys should stop focusing about female eyes seeing them au natural and carry on and get done what needs done.

If I would had let this "females might see me naked BULL S**T" get to me I would not have joined the military and seen the world, make great friends and get financial benefits now in my old age.

When I went down for my physical there were female nurses there and various military personnel of both sexes coming and going while a couple hundred of us naked 18 to 24 year old stood at attention in line against the walls of an huge airplane hanger.

Guys its just skin after all. Trust me, once the nurses get home after a long day at work they have forgotten all about you.

Damon, Surprise, AZ

-- Damon, February 25, 2005

Recently my family decided to seek a new family doctor. My wife decided on a woman doctor. I believe a doctor should not be judged on sex and agreed.

I made an appointment for my annual physical. Everything went fine, the nurses did their blood pressure and other things. WHen the doctor arrive, my wife told me she was very attractive but young and attractive I did not expect. SHe did her doctor thing and at the end of the exam, she said it was time for my rectal exam. I though it was for hemmoroids. But then she ask me to lean over and support my self on the exam table. I did so and spread my legs she then said there will be some pressure and she inserted her finger into me. She than said there will be more pressure and she went deeper and started to feel around.

Is this a normal proceedure??? T

-- Anonymous, February 28, 2005

I have beengoing to doctor alot lately due to my poor health. The walls at the orthipedic's office are not sound proof and I hear the doctors telling girls to get underssed. the hospital is not better becuase of the curtain in the ER. the doctor told a girls to undress. She took off her shoes, shorts, shirt, socks bra, and panties. I think that a little exseive. My 15 year old neece will not undress for the doctor but her mother makes her.

-- Thomas, March 2, 2005

For a last message, mostly to Felicia, I just wanted to say that although I know this is about exposing one's genitals in a doctor's office, I want to clear up your misunderstanding that men don't understand women's feelings. I understand women's feelings a lot and would never mistreat a woman for any reason like a lot of men who cannot control their desires would do. The way I believe is that nudity does not always have to be sexual, whether in front of friends, doctors, or any other person who believes in the freedoms I do. I believe that nudity stands for freedom, and not just something sexual, and neither men nor women who are comfortable and trust one another need to have shame. Shame is all in one's head. It's because of the way this society, chiefly the American society has been brought up is the reason why people think that nudity is so shameful and everything has to be sexual. Most Americans just don't understand the freedom. Yet there are many people in the world who do believe that nudity is natural in front of anybody whose comfortable with it. I don't necessarily mean people should be walking around public streets nude, but in front of anybody else who believes in it, such as in colonies, beaches, nudist resorts, or any place like that where anybody can enjoy the freedom. You can have your own opinion if you want, Felicia, but I have mine also, and I believe what I believe and am strong with it. As for this, well, "Anwar", just by listening to this person's name I have a feeling where this person is from, and I could care less if this person comes from a backward society where women may have to cover everything but their eyes and have no freedom. The people on this sight I respect the most are Paduca, Fred, and Damon. I just wanted to add my own comments on society, doctors, or any person that may not have the shame many people do and only believe in the freedom many Naturalists believe in. Have fun talking about doctors or any other experiences shared on this sight. Thank you.

-- Ross, March 2, 2005, March 2, 2005

Last fall I got as call from our family doctor's office asking me to schedule my 16-year-old daughter Katy for a "well teen" exam. We weren't sure what to expect. Katy allowed me to be with her during the exam, for which I'm grateful. Katy was told to undress to her panties and socks and to put on a gown. The exam was basically a head-to-toe experience. The doctor removed Katy's socks in order to examone her feet. During the breast exam he had her slip the gown off. This was pretty embarrassing for her. He seemed to spend a lot of time on Katy's breasts, but said everything was okay. He did not do a pelvic exam. I think she would have died of embarrassment if he had done an internal exam. He did, though, have her lay on her back and slip her panties down to her ankles so he could "peek" at her genitals. He did what seemed to be an external exam of her vulva. He said he would do an internal exam at her visit next year. The whole thing was somewhat embarrassing for Katy. Has anyone else heard of these "well teen" exams?

-- Martha from IL, March 2, 2005

This is in response to Peducah, Kentucky, Sept. 9, 2004 message.

I could not agree with you more about letting go of this modesty BS. Guys should stop focusing about female eyes seeing them au natural and carry on and get done what needs done.

If I would had let this "females might see me naked BULL S**T" get to me I would not have joined the military and seen the world, make great friends and get financial benefits now in my old age.

When I went down for my physical there were female nurses there and various military personnel of both sexes coming and going while a couple hundred of us naked 18 to 24 year old stood at attention in line against the walls of an huge airplane hanger.

Guys its just skin after all. Trust me, once the nurses get home after a long day at work they have forgotten all about you.

Damon, Surprise, AZ

-- Damon, February 25, 2005

I just wanted to touch upon a subject covered on this message board alot. Men feeling embarassed by female onlookers during a physical exam in which they're undressed.

Well let me just say that it goes both ways. I was a nurse practitioner for 12 years in the navy. I along which many other female nurses assisted in those dreaded enlistee group physicals. The amount of nurses who request not to take part in these group physicals is more than half.

There are several reasons for this. The biggest reason is the way these young men just joining the navy are treated. They're humiliated by being made to stand nude in line as an officer verbally abuses them. Some nurses have religious issues in regards to seeing nude men. Some married nurse's husbands request they transfer. Its no cake walk for the nurses either.

From my experience very few people, patients & nurses alike enjoy this type of humiliating experience. However, if you have to go through it, just do what you have to do and get over with it.

Bless all the service men and women out there.

-- Steffi, March 4, 2005

i am 22 years old i went to the doctor cuz i got hit with a baseball bat in my testicle area. The doctor was a young female probably around 28 or so. She asked me what happened and i told her. She then told me to take a couple of pain releiving pills each days. I did not have to show her my testicles. i thought she handled the situation well.

-- kurt , March 4, 2005

Hello, I'm a 16 year old guy still in high

school. I have to get physical for school every

year and we go to the famly doctor. Before the

doctor comes in the nurse always tells me to

take all cloths off so I'm completly naked when

the doctor comes in. I have to be sitting on the

table and sometimes when the doctor opens

the door she is still talking to one of the

nurses or looking at a clipbord. So other

people can look in. I never liked this part

because it is embarresing. Also to be naked in

front of my mother and sister. And the doctor

always takes a long time listening to my heart

and back. Is this normal to have to take all

cloths off for a physical? I asked one of my

friends and he said he does not even have to

take his shirt off.

-- Chris, March 8, 2005

Response to PJ -- about the light touching on your abdomen -- if the physician was listening to your upper abdomen or rib cage with a stethoscope while lightly stroking your belly, he/she was probably looking for the bottom edge of your liver. This is sometimes called the "scratch test." By listening over your liver, the doctor can hear a change in the sound when he/she gently scratches your skin -- as the finger moves over the liver, the sound is transmitted more efficiently to the stethoscope, and when the finger moves past the bottom edge of the liver, the scratching sound is no longer heard clearly. An interesting "trick," but some argue that it is not very accurate -- although some swear it is the best way to detect the lower margin of the liver.

If the physician was not listening at the time of the light touching, it's possible he/she was testing your abdominal reflexes. This is not often done, although it is considered part of a complete neuro exam by some.

In response to Anonymous in October, about visitors/family in the examining room -- medical professionals will often ask all family/friends to leave the examining room, for patient privacy. Consider a situation in which a patient felt abused or threatened by the accompanying family member -- if that member were present, the patient may not be able to speak freely with the doctor. The reason that the doctor will ask the visitor to leave directly is to avoid putting the patient in the (possibly) uncomfortable position of having to admit they don't want the visitor present, possibly risking reprisal later. This is a test question I've gotten, btw! We are encouraged, whenever possible, to use only trained medical interpreters, and not family members, to bridge language barriers. This is to avoid situations like that described above, and also to avoid possible bias of a family member (think about this -- an oncologist trying to ask a patient if he/she wants to undergo long, uncomfortable chemotherapy which may only offer a small chance at a small increase in lifetime, with a high risk of a decrease in quality of life -- a son or daughter translating may be compelled to present things a little differently while translating)

-- 3rd Year Med Student, March 10, 2005

Yes Ross, I reside in a very backward, semi-literate area, the US South! you,

like several posters, seem to make no distinction between voluntary nudity and sexual humiliation, which can even be accomplished with minimal or no disrobing. Especially vulnerable are

patients who are not the physicians' clients. These victims: prisoners, school pupils and military conscripts are subjected to examinations with no medical relevance for the sole purpose of humiliation/control. in the past. such pople han no rights... Maybe we need a legislative fiat to give people who have been humiliated by physicians the right to reprisals. This proposal will be seen, by some, as a demand for an "auto da Fe" but I can't be the only person who resents mortal insult at the hands of an all-powerful medical caste. A few public, brutal examples may be "just what the Doctor ordered."

-- anwar, March 17, 2005

All this talk of persons not wishing to be examined nude is somewhat odd to me - surely it is best to know if there is something wrong from an overall physical exam rather than going unnoticed by keeping the body covered up? In my late teens, I was sent for a medical for a first job and the nurse gave me the instruction to go in a room, strip to my underpants and wait for the doctor. I was wearing skimpy briefs and thought that was ok. However, when the doctor came in, he wanted first to weigh and measure me and he immediately said remove your briefs and explained that he always examined in the nude for an accurate assessment. As the exam progessed, I relised the necessity for being nude - I had to give a sample in a bottle, my penis was examined top and botton, the orafice checked, my gentitals checked, my anus was examined etc. The rest of my body was checked. I was naked for a good 30 minutes and included raising arms above head, touching toes etc. My only embarrassment was that I am bit overweight and could pretend to be thinner by holding in my stomach! However the point Im making is its a peace of mind to be checked rather than not at all. (UK)

-- Anonymous, March 20, 2005

I am a 37yr. male and my last doctor retired. After finding a new doctor I was required to get a physical.

I was really dreading this physical just due to being modest person.

First the nurse came in and weighed me and gave me a modesty sheet. She asked me to remove everything except for my underwear. She came back in a few minutes and took my blood pressure and an EKG then said the doctor would be in soon.

The Doctor then came in and asked lots of health questions and began the physical exam. The doc started with my head and moved down to my chest. Then I was asked to lay on my back and was checked for lumps then got an abdomen check. I was asked to sit up and my reflexes were tested.

Next I was asked to stand - minus the modesty sheet but still wearing underwear - and the doctor pulled the band out, reached in (wearing gloves) and performed the cancer check. It was done quickly and I wasn't openly exposed.

This doctor put me at ease and still provided a complete exam.

-- Anonymous, March 23, 2005

In answer to Chris, I would re-assure him that it is important to be checked at your age - development and any problems can be easily resolved in your teens, rather than later in life when it could be more complex. At least by being examined nude, you will know that all is ok with you, whereas your friend is unlikely to know if his health is fully in order without any thorough check. Reading through the postings, I was somewhat concerned to read about some comments on communial checks. I have been examined in the uk and its generally one to one. Although when I was your age, we were sort of communial checked.Because,the physical was in a mobile unit, we were told a few days before hand to bring in swimbriefs or shorts and plimsoles. We had to change in a room and then cross the playground to the unit. On arrival we sat in a row, about 6 at a time, moving up a seat in turn and just before one's turn we told to remove the trunks and sit nude until called. This was normally for 10 minutes whilst the previous person was being examined. The nurse would have seen us nude. I recall that the doctor concerntrated most on our genital area, thus requiring being nude. So dont worry Chris when asked to go nude for an exam, it all to your good in the end.

-- Anonymous, March 27, 2005

Hi

I thought I would share an experience and have some questions answered.

When I was younger in 3rd grade I was diagnosed with eridal bowel sydrym (sp?) I was taken to a hospital in another town. When the doctor came in the room the first thing he did was ask me where it hurts. And at the time I was so shy I didn't want to talk.

Then after talking to my parents, he proceeded to ask me to climb onto the exam table and stick my butt into the air. "This is what we like to call the canon ball" he said. Now I was in the 3rd grade, and that's all he did to prepare me. All of a sudden I feel this pain in my rectum. It lasted about 5 seconds. But all I remember is that it really really hurt. I wanted to cry. He had a glove on, and at the time I thought he pushed his entire hand inside, but now that I think back to it, I'm assuming it was just a couple fingers. It really hurt and I just wanted to know first of all, if that's the right way to go about doing that to a 3rd grader. I was scared and confused and it was the most painfull thing I've ever had.

I am now in the 8th grade and I've heard somewhere or another that starting at a certain age all women/girls have to go to a doctor and have that done. Now I know that this is called a pelvic/rectal examination. I was wondering if someone could please fill me in on that and tell me in detail what is involved and if it's going to hurt. I'm scared to death.

Thanks so much

-- anonamous, March 28, 2005

I feel that the majority of us seem to ignore our health and only go to the doctor when feeling unwell. My opinion is a physical check every so often is important to ensure we are in good health. I note that due to financial cut backs, schools very rarely perform medicals on their pupils and we are now in a situation where many teenagers are become generally overweight and have health complications in their late teens. When I was at school in the 1960's medical checks were compulsory and they were always conducted in the nude and often in the company of other nude boys. At the time, we did not like it but compared with our nation's health now, I am glad I was checked over every year. I was fortunate that only my eyesight was a problem but if it wasnt for the medicals, it may have deterioted without me knowing it. I guess the same now applies in the USA and other parts of the World. I would be interested in hearing from others on this observation. (UK)

-- Anonymous, April 1, 2005

Went to a new md the other day. I(female) had to take everything off and was given a gown. The doc(female) came in, did the usual eye, ear, nose, throat,neck exam and then had me drop the gown to examine my breasts while sitting. I then had to lie back on the exam table while she checked my breasts lying down. She then lowered the gown to just above my pubic hair and examined my belly. The gown was then lowered to my knees, while she checked my femoral pulses. It was then time for the genital/pelvic exam. She covered my breasts with the gown while I put my heels into the stirrups and moved to the end of the table. She then checked my pubic hair, labia, clitoris(gently pulled back the hood), urethra(milked it to check for discharge), then did the usual speculum, pap, manual exam and rectal. Is it unusual to have the clitoris and urethra examined like this?

-- Anonymous, April 2, 2005

Yesterday I went for a physical exam.

The doctor was an older man in his 50's I would say. He asked me to take everything off and sit on the exam table.

He did the vitals and the pelvic exam then did the breast exam.

He asked me questions while examining my breasts. Then out of no where he just grabbed my nipple and pinched it- HARD. I sort of yelped and he laughed saying it was manditory. My breast leaked a bit and he whipped it with his gloves and then began prodding my stomach- again.

Does anyone else see this as odd or am I just being paranoid?

-- Sally Hughs , April 3, 2005

I'm originally from Poland and have been a doctor for 11 years now. I've held positions in general practice and dermatology medical offices?

Several years back I worked as a member of the medical staff with the Olympics in Australia. We had a chance to work with many athletes from around the world and the general concensus among the staff was that the American (male) athletes were quite arrogant in their attudes toward what gender will attend to them. We could not decide if this was based on modesty or misogynistic.

When a group of dermotolgists I was a part of examined competitors in martial arts, wrestling & swimming the men from Latin countries, Europe, Asia handled the exam very straight forward and casually. Unlike the American men who were at times very modest or upset about being nude in front a female medical staff member.

To the Americans reading this post, what exactly is the hang up with keeping your bodies a secret? All female doctors or nurses have invested much time & money in education and training, we only want to perform our job and serve those in need. I just can't imagine any woman I've worked along with getting excited examining members of the opposite sex.

-- Basia, April 3, 2005

when i went for a school exam, we all waited in the gym. no one was naked. when we went in to the exam room the doctor asked us to remove all of our clothes so she could examine us. when she felt my penis and testicles i knew she was professional and didn't care. my friends agreed. The next day when it was time for the girls' exam it was a male doctor that day. i asked the girls what happen in theirs and they said the doctor had his hand inside their vagina. i asked them what they thought. they said he was a doctor so they didn't care that he a guy. they asked us what happened we said we also had to take all our clothes off and our testicles we examined. they asked us if we cared when the female doctor was touching our testicles we said no she is a doctor. the doctor would never examine us open. the girls said that they had the choice of having the male principle in the room to make sure they we'rent assaulted. they said yes (smart) so he watched them. we said yes (smart) so he watched us. although i don't think the doctor would have hurt me, i felt comfortable having someone i trusted (the principle) in the room.

2 things

1)the medical staff is a professional, it matters to them what you have down there because that is they're job. but if they are trained medical staff what does it matter what they have down there?

2) although it sounds weird to have the principle in the room for the boys and girls who he doesn't know well but pretty good, to watch them bare naked, i was good to know someone was watching my respect.

many female doctors have examined my penis never have i cared that they are females.

-- Anonymous, April 5, 2005

My daughter had her yearly physical exam this week. She is 17 and a junior in high school. When I talked to her about how everything went she told me the doctor had performed a rather lengthy rectal exam. Normally her physicals are done with her wearing bra and panties, but evidently this one was different. She said the doctor examined her rectum visually and digitally. He did not perform a pelvic exam, but looked over her genitals. She was somewhat embarrassed by the exam and had not been expecting such an intimate inspection. Should I be concerned about this doctor? I mean, is it normal & proper for a teenager to be examined this way?

Thanks for any and all replies.

-- Concerned Mom, April 6, 2005

i am 13, my girl friend wanted me in at her gynecologist exam. she is also 13. they stripped her naked. well technicly speaking she took off her clothes. and he was not only puting objects but his fingers in her vagina. i thought he was assaulting her. then he asked her questions like how often did we have sex, etc. is this normal. i don't know if a 30 year old man should have his hand up a 13 year old girl's vagina. i am the one allowed in there. would someone like to talk about this please?

-- Anonymous, April 6, 2005

I'm a 16 year old male, and I have my first physical soon. Could someone (man, please) e-mail me, so that we can discuss what goes on and everything?

-- Daniael, April 9, 2005

There has been a lot of comment about our teenager's health in the UK, ie obesity, poor level of fitness, general health etc. I expect its the same in the USA. When I was at school in the 1960's, we always received an annual medical (physical exam) and general heath check. These were compulsory but this isn't done much today. Although as boys we hated it, for we were made to strip nude for the exams often with a female nurse present and had all our private parts handled and examined, on looking back, we all seemed to be more healthy than our young ones today. Perhaps we should go back to annual health checks whilst in teens and more guidance could then be given to prevent ill-health later in life?

David. England.

-- Anonymous, April 12, 2005

I'm a 16 year old girl and I've been going to thwe same doctor since I was about six. The problem is whenever I go for a an examination he has me get completely undressed, no gown or anything. I didn't mind until I was about 10 but now it bothers me. When I told my mother that I didn,t like being naked in front of him she told me I was being silly, that he has seen hundreds of girls naked. I don't want to get into an argument with him. The last time I went for an exam it was very embarrasing even more than usual since he examined my vagina while I was lying on the table with my legs open. I don't know what I should do. This doctor is like one of those old country doctors you read about. He really probably wouldn't understand why I was making a big deal of it.

-- Anonymous, April 12, 2005

I just found this site and I have a question. I'm 12 year old male and I have a sister who is 5. When I go for my annual exam my mother and my sister are in the room. The doctor has both of us stip to our underpants. When he exams my penis and everthing he stands on the side of me so my sister can't see. The last time while he was examining me there my sister walked over and looked. I told my mother the next time I wanted her to wait in the waiting room and not to bring my ssiter in. She told me that whenever the doctor examined anyone under 18 he had to have a parent in the room, Is this true? Whats going to happen when I start developing pubic hair and my sister sees me.

-- Anonymous, April 12, 2005

I don't understand why someone should object to being examined in the nude. I know of some parents who even object to to the childrens genitalia being examined. When my wife and I take our children to the doctor my wife goes into the exam room with my daughter and I go in with my son. My son is 11 and the doctor always does a complete exam which includs a thorough exam of his penis and testicles as well as a visual inspection of his anus. If it were not for this exam we wouldn't have known that one of my sons testicles had not descended and had receded into his inguinal canal.I know the exam is embarrasing for my son since his doctor is a woman. My daughter,who is 12 also gets a complete exam. My wife tells me that the doctor exmines her breasts and while she dosn't give her a pelvic exam she does spread her labia to visually inspect the interior of her vagina. With respect to modesty my daughter is given a paper gown while for some reason my son isn't given one, he's in the nude for the entire exam. Although I don't use this doctor I can tell you that when I was treated for testicular cancer some time ago the oncologist was a woman and I always had to strip to my underpants which I had to pull down so she could examine my testicles. After about 15 sessions of radiation most of my pubic hair fell out and my genitalia looked like that of a 12 year old boy. I never really felt self conscious of this except when she would bring in another doctor or medical student to observe.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2005

I'm a 15 year old girl and I really think doctors can do better than to give you one of those paper gowns to wear during an exam. My last exam the nurse told me to take off all my clothing and put on the gown. I couldn't close the back of it so my backside was exposed all during the exam. Also when the doctor told me to let down the top so he could examine my breasts the thing tore so for the rest of the exam one of my breasts was exposed. Some people, my mother for example, would say so what, but I think the gown should offer a degree of modesty. At least my doctor gives his female patients a gown, I know he dosn't give them to his male patients. My brother told me that he is naked throughout the exam, maybe the fact that he's 11 has something to do with it. Anyway my friends doctor dosn't even do that, she told me that she only has her panties on during the eaxm and when the doctor examines her vagina, I know it's really her vulva, she has to remove her panties and lie on the table spread eagled. When doctors go to medical school aren't they taught anything about patients modesty. Some people feel completely at ease being naked in the exam but I think most people don't.

-- Anonymous, April 13, 2005

I'm a former director of the athletics dept. at a college here in the midwest. The college was a large one but not one of the elite colleges. We faced this situation of female medical staff members examining male athletes for sports physicals, dermatology examinations and other areas of sports medicine.

The college board of directors decided that we could not risk the threat of lawsuits by banning females from doing jobs they were qualified & trained to do. So we had no alternative but to hire those qualified females and allow them the same work conditions as their male counterparts.

This decision did not go well with many of the athletes. Many of them came from poor backgrounds and have no health insurance so they cannot go to a private doctor for an exam. But our decision stood and a few athletes choose not to participate in the school athletics program rather than be examined by a women.

Now that the policy has been in place for a couple of years there is very little complaining. The athletes have gotten used to seeing the women all the time coming into the locker room and attending to their minor injuries.

They now see that the females are there ONLY to do their job.

However, some athletes from other colleges that visit for swimming & wrestling competitions have objected to having to be examined by a female for skin checks (which require the athlete to be nude). Looks like this debate of female medical staff examining male athletes will continue.

-- Felix, April 19, 2005

Hello. I'm 15 years old and have been having constant problems with my doctor. I had an exam yesterday. The doctor pinched my nipples very hard causing them to leak and bit. He wiped it off on his gloves then proceeded onto the pelvic exam where he laughed while asking me if I expierienced any pain. Does anyone else find this odd behavior?

-- Susanna Wellings , April 19, 2005

I fully appreciate the degree of anxiety when the patient and doctor are of opposite sex. Surely, it would be wise for a female to ask for a female doctor. Likewise, a male would be wise to see a male doctor. The main reason being each sex understands and appreciates any of their own pains and possible health problems. If a person requires a full examination, it is easier for a doctor to conduct the exam in the nude, rather than have any clothing or gowns in the way. Stangely my nude physicals were when I was teenage being the school physicals, which were very strict and were compulsory. The medical staff used to come round in a mobile caravan every year and boys were instructed in advance to bring their swimming briefs and plimsoles. The reason for this was that a room for changing was allocated and when the turn came, normally in pairs, had to go across the playground in the open to the caravan - regardless of the weather! On entering, the female nurse ordered us to take off the footwear and swimming briefs. We were then weighed, measured and had eyes tested and then sent inside a curtained off area to see the doctor, for the main exam, which included penis, testicle and anus exam. The actual doctor's exam was one to one but the weighing and eye tests were communial and I often wondered why this was done naked, as a skimpy pair of swimming briefs would not have any difference to our weight.

-- Anonymous, April 23, 2005

I'm a 16 year old female that recently had a

very embarrassing physical exam. I had to

get a sports physical from a random doctor

because I couldn't get an appointment with

my family doctor in time. I was really afraid I

would get a male doctor. I had never been

naked in front of a man before besides my

dad. I grew up with a female family doctor. I

talked to some of my freinds and they said

the exam was really embarrassing and they

had to take off all their clothes. My mom

went to the appointment with me. When we

got there the nurse told me undress to my

panties and handed me a gown. She said

the doctor would be in shortly. The doctor

came in with a male intern and I looked at

my mom. She didn't say anything, I was so

mad. She just nodded her head even

though she knew I was really worried. He

started off doing the usual (eyes, ears,

mouth, etc.) Without warning the doctor lifted

my gown off over my head to expose my

breasts. He gave me a breast exam and

then instructed the intern to preform a breast

exam. I was humiliated. Next I had to lie on

my back and the doctor examined my

breasts again. Then he pulled off my panties

and spread my legs open. I was so

embarrassed lying completly naked in front

of two men and my mom. I started to tear up

a little. My mom told me it would be ok. The

doctor told me relax, he wanted to make

sure I was completely healthy. He felt

around my pubic hair and touched my

vagina. Then he stuck his finger up my

vagina and pressed down really hard

around my stomach. It hurt so bad! He

instucted the intern to inspect me and take

note of my pubic hair growth and make sure

to check for any discharge. He seemed to

spend more time probably because it was

his first time. He didn't stick his finger up me

though. Thank god! Should a 16 year old girl

be subject to this kind of exam? My mom

told me that it wasn't a big deal. I thought I

should have been told before hand that

there would be an intern.

-- Anonymous, April 25, 2005

STOP COMPLAINING! I've spent a couple of days reading this entire message thread. It became boring reading the athlete's complaints about getting nude for a skin check. Do you think you can just tell a doctor your fine and he/she is suppose to just take your word for it. Thats crazy. If your involved in sports, especially wrestling & the martial arts you SHOULD know & be used to full body skin check. And one SHOULD know & expect a woman to examine you at some point, seeing as how nearly half the people in medicine are women.

As one who has officiated at martial arts competitions in Europe there is no complaining about "women seeing me sans clothing." I've witness women performing skin checks on male athletes nude. I've witness women perform weigh-ins of male athletes nude. And I've seen women attend to injured male athletes, who were in a state of undressed. And always the women were professional & respectful in their duties and the athletes always just took it all in stride.

I guess this should be directed to the Americans posting to this section of the site. The problem only arises with an athlete making a big deal of a female seeing them nude. If you expect an awkward or embarassing situation your are sure to get one.

Take care & lighten up.

-- Anonymous, April 29, 2005

I spent a few minutes reading this and it is so stupid. THere is nothing wrong getting naked infront of a doctor of the oppisite sex. THeres no big deal..teh person chekcs u, maybe gives some shots and ur free to go. Noone cares how u look and those who do r just weird. People and object to this but it doesnt make a difference. Being subjected to an exam by a female doctor can be just as good as a male doctor and vice versa. Being checked is for your best interest and you make a choice to go to the doctor in the first place.

-- A guy, May 4, 2005

Hello,

I am 16. The last time I went to the doctor I spent most of the time completely naked! No gown, no sheets, nothing. The testicular exam seemed very excessive especially when he seemed to "massage" my lower stomach and genitals. He also turned me over and felt my anus. Is this normal?

-- Anonymous, May 14, 2005

I am 18 and female and I have noticed that the ones making light of modesty, are generally male. I have also noticed some posts seem suspicious. By that I mean, that some of these stories can't be true.

Generally doctors respect privacy and there is always a nurse around or you can have your mother, or your friend or your lover there with you.

In no case, should doctors have siblings disrobed in front of each other because it is wrong to do that.

Finally, just because Europeans allegedly are more open-minded about modesty, does that make Americans arrogant or conceited. This an attempt at America-bashing and it is as silly as any other stereotype.

If I as a woman, want to be selective about who can be there and what a doctor can and cannot do, that should be MY decision.

At a lot of teaching institutions, women receive pelvic exams under anesthesia and many times without the patients prior approval. This is tantamount to sexual assault and the wishes of the patients should be explicitly adhered to and not circumvented by interns trying to get in the mandatory number of pelvic exams.

If you think this doesnt happen, I would encourage you to do a google search and most notably, the University of Michigan's Obstetric and Gynecology division.

Patients have a right to informed consent. Felicia

-- Felicia, May 15, 2005

I am a 15 year old Female, and A few weeks

ago, I went to a doctor for a sports physical.

When I first got into the doctors office, the

nurse took me to an examination room, and

she told me to take all my clothes off and put

on the robe she handed to me. When I was

changing, THE DOCTOR CAME IN!!!! I was

so embarrased, and the doctor looked back

FOR MY PRIVACY. What was even more

embarrasing is that the doctor was a male,

and I was hoping for a female. First the

doctor did the usual things, eyes, ears,

mouth, BUT THEN the worst happened, he

took my whole robe off, and Said, Sorry

about that, then he did the breast exam. I

hated it, It was so embarrasing especially

when the doctor saw me cry a little. He said

it was okay, then he checked my stomach.

then he checked the DOWN WAIST PART,

which was so embarrasing. He told me to

put my feet in these stirrup thingies, I refused

, since I wasn't wearing underwear, But then

the nurse came in and pulled my feet apart.

Then the doctor took a flashlight out and did

a pelvic exam. It was so embarrasing and I

will never forget it. My question is, is it fair

that i have to do this? In my opinion, the

doctor was totally disresepctful.

-- Anonymous, May 17, 2005

I am floored by all the reports of what seem to be very suspicious exams that are posted here.

I just had a terrible experience with a urologist who saw me for a kidney stone that was active and is on the way out. He tried to do an unnessary pelvic and rectal because he was irritated with me. I refused and didn't quite catch on at the time what was happening under the surface but knew that something was off. Later I realized how bad of a situation it was, there is no reason for him to have been examining me like that and I'm now recalling quite a few women who have been uncomfortable with him- this is a small community and he's one of just a few urologists in the area.

I'd been to the local ER and had a cat-scan showing the stone and position and he had all the reports. No complications, it was very straightforward.

I have a complicated medical history and in the process of his doing a history he was pompous(yes,hes older) and a bit demeaning and I stood up to him and held my ground.

Well.

We got done the history and my explaination of the problem and he basically told me that there wasn't anything he could do for me, I needed to wait to flush it out. I asked about several treatments and was told they wouldn't work for my situation.

At the end of the verbal history he stated that he needed to do a pelvic and a rectal exam. For a kidney stone??

I asked him why and was told 'we like to treat the whole person'. I refused the exam which ticked him off but I didn't see the point of the exam and he didn't want to tell me.

Over the next couple days it started to hit me that things were even worse than I though. I realized that he NEVER asked about when I'd had my last gyn appointment or any testing I'd had. When I refused the exam he never told me later to see my gyn for a checkup.

No, he wasn't treating me for anything other than the stone.

After thinking and talking to a few people including nurse friends I reached the conclusion that he didn't like me and by laying me down with my legs spread and sticking things into me, he could 'get even' with me. Absolutely.

Power play exams? I don't think so! I've told both my children since then that you have the right to say no or ask questions even with a doctor and that if they are uncomfortable because they don't understand or feel that a doctor is doing something out of the norm, they should tell them to stop.

I'm horrified by this experience. I have some chronic health issues and do see my share of physicians and I'm now wondering how many other doctors have done unnecessary exams to 'put me in my place'. I feel sick just thinking about it.

To the moms - you need to call the doctors offices and ask if you feel that your child has had a strange exam. DO NOT just let it go for your child's sake and for the next time.

-- Anonymous, May 20, 2005

Tagging onto my last post :

You should NEVER continue to see a doctor who makes you uncomfortable or suspicious!!

Even if they're not doing anything wrong, clearly their manner doesn't work for you. Find a new doctor who you can trust and who communicates better with you.

LADIES and GIRLS - Always make sure that there is a nurse in the exam room when a doctor does a pelvic. If there isn't one that may be a clue to you if you feel that something was wrong with the way you were 'examined'. If a nurse doesn't come in when the doctor starts an exam(at my doctors office they come in for the pelvic, not the breast exam)

Planned Parenthood is one of the better resources for younger women. I went there when I was younger and they are great about telling you what they're doing and why.

With a pelvic, the doctor WILL examine your breasts and touch them very carefully and he/she will do an external and internal examination of your pelvic area. They'll touch you externally first then they do insert their fingers while pressing your stomach and to check you. After that they insert a speculum which is a small instrument that opens. They usually take some samples for tests using a long Q-tip instrument. If you are a virgin, speak up! They can use a small speculum so they don't hurt you. Often they do a rectal at the end and this is usually a FAST procedure they do with a gloved,lubricated finger while feeling inside your vagina at the same time. They're checking the back wall of your uterus for lumps when they do this. Anything more with a rectal exam or having to move around in various directions is not in the normal range and you should ask questions about what the doctor is doing or make them stop if you feel uneasy. If they think you have a problem and have an answer about why they're checking you so closely that makes you feel ok then that's a good answer. Otherwise - go with your gut and don't let ANYONE touch you if you feel strange about it. A pelvic exam is not a fun experience but it shouldn't be horribly painful nor should it be so mortifying that you're devastated afterwards.

We pay the doctors bills, they're our employees. We have the right to ask questions and to be comfortable with any exams they do. They should tell us what to expect and why they're doing an exam or test. If they won't tell us we should GET OUT OF THERE and find a new doctor.

For the people who say to relax - a doctor sees lots of people nude or who imply that you should blindly trust anyone who puts M.D. after their last name, I've got to respond -----WHAT??? Doctors have been convicted of raping patients, it's not uncommon. They definitely can abuse their power and have been proven to have done that too. You and only YOU have the final say in what is done to your body. Say no.

-- Anonymous again, May 20, 2005

I WENT TO A DOCTOR FOR AN HEMMORROID EXAM. WHEN I HAD EXAMS LIKE THIS BEFORE I WAS ALWAYS LEFT ON MY SIDE AND COVERED UP. THIS DOC CAME IN AND TOLD ME NOTHING ABOUT WHAT HE WAS GOING TO DO. HE SAID HE WAS JUST GOING TO TAKE A LOOK TO SEE WHAT WAS GOING ON. A NURSE TOOK ME INTO ANOTHER ROOM INSTRUCTED ME TO UNDRESS FROM THE WAIST DOWN AND PUT A BLANKET AROUND ME LEAVING IT OPEN IN THE BACK. I SAT ON THE EXAM TABLE AND THE DOCTOR AND NURSE CAME IN AND THE DOCTOR LAUGHED AT ME FOR SITTING ON THE TABLE AND INSTRUCTED ME TO KNEEL AT HIS FEET FACING THE TABLE. I COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT I WAS GOING TO BE EXAMINED BENDING OVER THE TABLE WHILE ON MY KNEES. HE TOLD ME TO BEND OVER THE TABLE AND PUT BOTH ARMS ABOVE MY HEAD AND GRAB ONTO THE PILLOW. WHEN I LET GO OF THE BLANKET IT FELL TO THE FLOOR AND I WAS LEFT EXPOSED FROM THE WAIST DOWN AND THE TABLE RAISED ME UP AND BENT ME FORWARD SO MY BUTT WAS IN THE AIR AND THE DOCTOR AND THE NURSE STOOD BEHIND ME AND WATCHED WITHOUT COVERING ME UP. I WASN'T INFORMED OF HOW THE EXAM WAS TO BE CONDUCTED. I WAS HUMILATED AND HORRIFIED BY THE LACK OF RESPECT FOR MY DIGNITY AND PRIVACY. I LEFT THE EXAM FEELING SICK TO MY STOMACH. I GOT SO UPSET THAT I COMPLAINED ABOUT THE EXAM ONLY TO HEAR THAT IS WAS BASICALLY MY FAULT FOR BEING EMBARRASSED NOT ANY FAULT OF THE DOCTOR. HE CLAIMS IT WAS JUST A NORMAL EXAM. HE SAID HE DIDN'T RELIZE THE BLANKET HAD FALLEN OFF. I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT SOMEONE COULD DO THAT TO ANOTHER PERSON AND NOT CARE ABOUT THIER FEELING AT ALL DOES ANYONE ELSE THINK THIS IS WRONG?

-- Anonymous, May 21, 2005

I have a pretty crazy experience to share. I am a 28 year-old male who recently went to the doctor’s office for the first time in years because I got a pretty bad sinus infection. My company sent me to one of these private “doc in a box” places, so I couldn’t choose my own doctor. I wanted to get in and out quickly, just get a prescription and be on my way. Didn’t happen. First, the nurse comes out and takes me back to a room. Although I will admit that she was extremely attractive (very tall, blonde, large chest, probably about 30 years old), she was not very pleasant. She asked me a bunch of questions that had nothing to do with why I was there (including whether or not I am sexually active, how much I drink, how many pillows I use to sleep, etc.) and even scolded me for not getting annual physicals. Then she said she needed to get my height and weight. I know for a fact I am over 6ft, but she said I was only 5’10 ¾, which just can’t be right. I was also surprised on the scale—I hadn’t weighed myself in several months but think I was just under 175. I couldn’t believe when she zipped that stupid little weight bar right through the 20s, then 30, all the way up to 38 before moving it back to 33 ½, which comes out to 183 ½. Then I had to take my shirt off while she checked my temperature, blood pressure, pulse, and listened to my heart forever with an ice cold stethoscope. She said my BP was a bit high (156/88), but those old school mercury things on the wall have always made me nervous, I don't know why. Then she left and said the doctor would be in soon. So the doc comes in, also female, turns out she is a nurse practitioner. Anyway, she was ok, just looked in my ears, eyes, mouth, etc. and asked me a bunch of questions. She didn’t even use her stethoscope. She said it was obviously a sinus infection and wrote me a few prescriptions. I thought I was done, but then the first nurse comes back in and asks me how much I weighed a year ago and whether I had gained weight recently, because she said my BMI is 26, which is overweight. I think I am in pretty decent shape, so I was pretty ticked off to hear this, especially since I came in for a sinus infection. She tells me I am 18 pounds over my “target” weight and shows me this chart and writes down all this stuff on my ticket. Well, one of the problems is that she is using the 5’10 height column, which is at least two inches too low and even less than what she measured me. I was just kind of letting her go through her little lecture, and then she says she wants me to enter this weight management program and come back every two weeks for weigh-ins and BP checks. Later, I found out from a colleague who went there that this woman (the nurse) actually gets paid to refer people to the weight management clinic, which is in the same office! So it made me wonder if she intentionally understated my height to say I was overweight. Then I stopped in at a gym in my neighborhood and weighed myself at 178, which is about what I would have expected. That’s 6 pounds less than she weighed me, so I am beginning to think even the scale in that office is rigged as well. Has anyone ever heard about this kind of scam before? Beware!! I think it’s pretty ridiculous and not fair, because those weight/height numbers become part of my health record and they are wrong!!

-- Anonymous, May 22, 2005

I hate to liter up this board with this stupid topic but here goes. I find it ridiculous the male athlete's prudish attitudes of dealing with female medical staff. If your in high school I can sort of understand seeing as how you may not have been exposed to the real world. However college/university athletes can't be excused for their modesty. This leads me to think that some of the messages are fake. Because REAL jocks don't give a damn about modesty, coaches wouldn't allow fear or modesty from any athlete.

Years ago as a teen I taged along with my dad who worked in sports medicine for a university. I was always in the locker room and women coaches and women reporters had total access to the men's locker room and the guys never seemed inhibited being nude in front of the women present. So why would guys be uncomfortable with a female doctor or nurse seeing them nude. The only difference among these women are their jobs.

The athletes whining about being totally nude for skin checks add to the perception of the dumb athlete. Let me enlighten you guys as to what the doctors are looking for during these checks. They're looking for blisters, moist lesions, Herpes Simplex I, nail fungus, jock itch, athlete's foot, ringworms hidden by bodily hair, genital worts, etc. ALL of these can be transmitted through touch. These diseases can be anywhere on the body thats why one must be nude during an exam.

Without sounding arrogant, I hope this ends the posts concerning males not wanting a female doctor or nurse to see them nude. If its that traumatic why don't you transfer to the theater dept.

-- Anonymous, May 24, 2005

Many posters express resentment at

indignities medical types have inflicted on them. Some even propose violence as their Rx for medical hubris! But all should remember that the issue is control and if mechanisms are not put in place to curb

this behaviour (by physicians) including a world ban on group examinations, we can expect more intense revenge taking for ritualised abuse. When a person feels violation, contamination or a loss of face; he/she is unlikely to "lighten up" (as one poster suggests) -until their tormenter has been punished. Humiliating people in order to gain or keep the upper hand is unacceptable and must be dealt with sternly. It must be considered grounds for terminating a distinguished (or promising) career.

-- jean-marie, May 25, 2005

im a teenage girl. Two years ago, I was sexually harassed- by a team of doctors. It started when my mom picked me up from school in the middle of the day. I had no idea that this was going to happen. She took me out to the car and started driving. When we got to where we were going, I was instantly suspicious. It was the place where she had my twin brothers. She took me inside, and signed lots of papers. I was very confused. Then a doctor called my name and pulled me into a room. They made me take off all my clothes. then they pulled got up on a table and they pulled my legs apart and started rubbing and pushing me down there. they put this cold stuff all over. Then, they stuck this thing up my urethra. It hurt more then anything! they started pumping this liquid up inside me. There were about 5 "doctors" and my mom staring at me butt naked for about a half hour. I was screaming and crying but the "doctors" (i prefer to call them f---ers) held me down. Then, as a further embarassment, they made me pee on the table! I was soo humiliated! Has anybody ever had an experience like this before? When I finally put my clothes back on I was trembling. When I went to the doctor's for a strep test, it was positive. They made me pee in a cup too. And when I was in the room waiting i heard my mom and the f---ers out in the hall talking.

f- i think we should give her another vcug, just in case.

m- she doesnt like those

f- nobody does. but we're probably going to schedule one.

m- okay, but how will i tell her?

that was all i heard and i knew what they were talking about. in the past, i have had 2 of those humiliating and degrading experiences. is this normal? has anybody else done this? i dont know why its nescessary and none of my friends have done it. so all you so called "doctors" out there, THINK about your patients. We have feelings. There is no reason for doing this. I hate doctors. is this some sort of test that they do for science? if so, "doctors," do it on yourself. nobody cares about science or "beakthrough medical discoveries". so stay 2 yourselves. STAY OUT OF ME!!!

-- Annonymous, May 25, 2005

I have read the comments on this site with interest. I recently developed an illness that required an intimate physical exam by my doctor who is a young woman. Before she started, she explained why the exam was neccesary and what it would involve. She didn't rush me and was very discrete about how much of my private parts were exposed. Although embarrassed, I was satisfied that the doctor had treated me with respect and consideration and had done her best to minimise my embarrassment, while still doing her job. I actually felt more comfortable with a doctor of the opposite gender.

I think that is all most people want from their doctor; to be treated caringly as a person with feelings at a time when you are possibly sick, vulnerable and worried. Although the doctor may have seen many people in various states of undress and be trained to view it dispassionately- the patient has recieved no training as to how to be a patient. This is where a good doctor can guide you through the process.

Here are a few of my suggestions if that isn't too arrogant.

At the start of any examination the doctor should ask you if you mind a second person being present, either a nurse or a student doctor. Sometimes I have said yes and sometimes no, depending on the nature of the problem.

The doctor should explain why they are doing a particular examination and what it will involve.

Thr patient should only have to undress or expose that part of the body as required at any stage of the exam and should not be left uncovered unnecessarily.

I know some people who have submitted to the website say we should not be so prudish about being naked or partially naked. Some of us however, don't have the same confidence in our bodies that you have, unfortunately. I personally think it must be horrible for my poor doctor to see any part of my body, not to mention how unpleasant for her to have to exam the more intimate regions.

-- Ray, May 27, 2005

I agree with Jean-Marie but he (if that person is a Francophone)doesn't

go far enough. A ban on group visits is a start since they boost the arrogance of md's into the stratosphere! No physician has the right to humiliate a person of either sex! If confronted

with a surly doctor. Make them justify the degree of undressing demanded, every palpation etc! Scowl like Frank Viola all through the enounter! Make it clear that the disrespect is being returned! Afterwards, play big league hardball. Don't stop until you've hurt them enough to save face. If you're a teenager humiliated during a sports physical (for example), "handle" the culprit on the back 9 at the country club!

Here's to Victory!

-- Brooke, May 28, 2005

I'd like to talk about a few messages I've seen on this board relating to nudity in front of the opposite sex. For one thing, it's easy for women to say that men shouldn't feel embarrassed or humiliated over other females seeing them nude. No male coaches, teachers, etc., go into the locker room when they're being examined. It would end up with an arrest beyond the shadow of a doubt.

For me! I could care less. I'm a 56 year old man who would just as well be examined in a parking lot. If someone wants to gawk at me, I pity them. They need to get out more often.

We're talking about young high school boys here, not adults. They see these female teachers and coaches every day of their scholastic lives. It's not only degrading and demeaning to them, but not really all that great for their mental health either. I would never allow my childen to go through such a thing.

Another was a message about female reporters in the locker rooms, and the atheletes not caring. Wrong! Reggie White (may he rest in peace) fought that until the day he died. These guys were not happy with this decision. I don't believe a federal judge (female OF COURSE!)had the right to say that was allowed. It was up to the players to decide that. For a long time they refused to give interviews, and some simply left the locker room and took their showers at the hotel or home.

They're called privates for a reason, and what's between a man's legs is the business of... and in this order:

God, His Wife, and His Doctor.

Nudity IS no big deal, but it is when a person is subjected to it involuntarily and without notice. Some people are simply embarrassed and shy. I'm 56 years old. I know what my testicles and penis should look and feel like. I don't need another adult m/f doctor feeling around down there, I have a urologist who takes care of that side of me.

Okay, I ranted and raved, but dammit! Be reasonable here. Everyone has different attitudes toward something, that's why we get to vote for a president every four years. Not everyone likes who wins, but at least we get to choose. Don't attempt to force your visions, thoughts, and attitudes down someone else's throat, it simply doesn't work that way.

PJ - Maryland

-- PJ, June 1, 2005

Vcug's are painful. In my many years of practice I've had to give 3. It's painful to give also. Why don't people lighten up and get a little less selfish. What happened happened and nothing can be done to fix your humiliation. Good luck in the future!

-- Doctor Loius Vandenhuevel, June 1, 2005

I am a 24 year old female who recently had a pre-employment physical. I didn't know what to expect and was shocked at the extent of the exam! I first had to do a drug test (pee in a cup). The nurse also gave me a whisper hearing test and an eye test. Then she took my height, weight, and BP. She then gave me a gown and told me to remove everything except my panties and put the gown on so that it opens in the front. The doctor quickly came in and started the exam. He looked in my eyes, ears, nose, and throat. He felt my throat and neck and asked for "one good swallow" while holding my throat. He then listened to my heart through my back and then on my chest. My breasts were partially exposed as he did this. He then opened the gown and began feeling my breasts and pinched my nipples. He asked me to lie back on the table and did another breast exam. It was very thorough, probably 5-6 minutes. I have rather dense breasts and he kep pressing pretty hard, especially around my armpits. He then listened to my heart again on my chest while lying down. I have a heart murmur and it is heard best just under my left breast while laying down. He then began feeling my stomach and abdomen with my gown open and breasts exposed. He felt my pulse in my ankles and looked at my feet. He then asked me to stand and assume various positions. (Bend over, lean back, move from side to side, squat down, etc) This is awkward as I was still in the gown and it kept flapping open exposing my breasts. After that, he had me remove my panties and get back on the table. He did a thorough visual exam of my vagina and then inserted two gloved fingers in my vagina and pressed on my abdomen. He also did a rectal exam. After this, a nurse came in to give me a TB test. Is this normal for an employment physical? All the form request was a drug and TB test. I was not expecting to have to disrobe and was definitely not expecting a vaginal exam!

-- Anonymous, June 2, 2005

Hi. I am 14 years old.I am in the 9th grade and I tried out for the school volleyball team and made it. Well, I was online looking at our school website and I went to the coaches assignments to see what sort of workouts I would be doing this summer. Thats when I saw that it said I had to get a physical. I went online to see what a physical consisted of and it really is scaring me because I have never had one and im a little scared. Does anyone have ANY advice?? Thanx

-- Anonymous, June 4, 2005

Hi. I am 15. Female. Last week I went for my annual physical. My mom died a long time ago so my dad takes me to my doctor's appointments. Well when I got there everything went normally we waited and then my name was called. A nurse took me back while my dad waited in the waiting room. When we got to a room, she told me to take everything off including my bra and underwear and put on this modesty blanket. I was not used to this at all and since I am only 15 I was quite startled. When the doctor came in he asked me some questons and proceeded to examine my ear, nose, Bp. Then he said I need to take a quick little peek under my gown. He then he can't really see that well so asked if I would mind taking the whole thing off. Without waiting for my reply he YANKED it off. I tried to cover up but he laughed and told me not to be embaressed. But I still was. Then he started to push my breast around and he said he was just checking to make sure I didn't have any cancer. Well I didn't think young girls got breast cancer. Then he examined my vagina. He looked at it and then started to pull everything around and placed his finger into it. Then he laughed. He said ok, and then told me to stand up on the floor and bend down. He puled my butt apart and just looked. All of this without anything covering me up. I was turning redder and redder by the minute. When he finished he told me I could put everything back on. I started to and then realized he was watching me intently. He then realized and said he was just making sure I was moving around right. I couldn't get my bra star closed and then he came over and helped. I could of died. I finally finshed and went outside. He smiled at my dad and said I was growing up perfectly. I couldn't bear to tell my dad what happened and there is no woman I can talk to. What I want to know is was that appropriate, what he did? Especially without a nurse. Please email me because I want to know if he did sdomething wrong and if anyone has any ideas what I should do. Thank you!

-- Anonymous, June 5, 2005

here is the truth 1st of all you are the boss not the doctor not your parents it's not the law for your parents or the doctor to do anything if you want the doctor can't even tell your parents anything. 2nd of all i dont understand why people care who the doctor is, just get your exam and leave. i am a male adolecents pediatrician. my female patents always tell me they like having me because they feel they're in control (which makes me happy to know that they know what's right) and because of that they are not uncomfortabe when i give them a pelvic exam. if there is anything you don't like don't do it, find a new doctor. although, don't judge them on their gender, some posts say the doctor laughed? GET UP AND LEAVE! if i found out one of my coleagues laughed, i would make them call up every patient they ever had and apologize. but if nothing feels wrong ignore them. if a patient of mine is uncomfortable i tell them to shut their eyes and think about something they enjoy and the exam will br over soon. siblings are watched by the secretary in my office and may not enter without permission of patient not the gaurdian. if the patient doesn't want the parents in, done that's it. if you don't feel your doctor is making you feel comfortable find one that does. some people prefere same gender physicians ad some prefere opposite gender physicians, which ever one you want and one you feel comfortable is your choice. PS, often i encounter males with erection during the examination of they're gentials including the penis and testicles and sometimes they apologize. i tell them i don't care i'm trained not to and it's nature you didn't do anything wrong, it can also be a good thing, then it's showing me your sexual areas are working properly. here is how i approach genital exams on my paitents:

male: i will now examine your penis and testicles here is whats happening... do you have anything to ask before we start?

females: i will now examine your vagina and pubic hair, here is what's happening... do you have anything to ask before we start? i make no surprizes. when i insert a finger into the vagina/rectum it is always expected and if my paitents are having a complete physical examination they have a gown that opens in many different areas on only that part of the body id exposed. if it is not a full physical they are coming in maybe because they have flu symtoms i will only ask them to remove their shirt/bra so i can see that area and listen to the heart and luungs without having the paitent not wearing their clothes for areas not reqiured to be examined. at the end of the day, i enjoy what i did that day. knowing i helped someone. i don't care if they have a penis or a vagina i just feel happy because they are either healthier or know they are healthy

-- a doctor, June 6, 2005

Is it normal for a woman's nipples to become erect during a breat exam?

-- Anonymous, June 6, 2005

Doctors have so much going on in their practices that they can just rush you through without regards to your modesty. When I was a teenager (about 15 years ago) my younger brother ,who was 10 years my junior, and I had our checkups together. Since I was a teen and my brother was very young you would think that the doctor would conduct the exams seperately ,so that the teen could be examined in private and the mother observing the younger child's exam.

No,instead from the time I was 13 till I was 17 my brother ,my mother and myself were escorted to an exam room where we were immediately instructed to "have the boys undress to their underpants" while the nurse was literally tapping her foot with impatience since we could not undress fast enough. Once we got weighed and our blood pressure checked we got to wait around while the pediatrician showed up. He would give us the quick once over that ended with us dropping our briefs to our ankles as everyone in the room got a good look at our buttocks and penises. I don't think he ever talked to us or would even recognize us with our clothing on. We were just two little boys in briefs to him.

-- bad experience, June 8, 2005

I have been reading the correspondence. I live in the UK and am almost lost for words from the comments as much as I wonder how near to the truth they are. I am a First Aider (Life Saver Certificate) in the UK all voluntary. We are trained in examining casulaties to protect modesty at all costs. We first train on a dummy and then on actual people. When we examine head to toe, we use our eyes first to see any wet patches - blood - urine etc etc.. We then feel the skin and parts of the body but if the casualty is conscious we talk to them and tell them what we are doing throughout.

Following on with the comments - doctors and hospitals. If an appointment is made in advance for a physical exam, hospitals in the UK generally send a letter telling the patient what to expect and what samples if any to bring. I have had exams for IBS and the letter has fully explained the procedures. On arrival, a nurse has explained entirely what was to happen. Normally, we are invited to take our own dressing gowns and we only have to reveal our bodies at the required moment in time. Surely, this is the same in the USA???

Regarding sports physicals - yes, media and cameras should not be allowed in dressing rooms - the BBC would never go there. Regarding physical exams, surely sports men/women are used to nudity. Some sport requires almost public nakedness anyway - eg. swimming, diving, wrestling etc... public cannot help but seeing their body form.

At the end of the day - there will be areas of the body a stranger will have to touch and examine but its all in the procedure to protect health and providing all is done professionally, it must be for the best??? I hope you will agree with my comments.

-- David, June 11, 2005

Au contraire! Monsieur Vandenhuevel! People's humiliation can be partly remedied by harsh punishment of the guilty parties... which would have some

deterrence value. Quid pro quo humiliation is especially odious and we must allow minor children (even decades after they attain majority) to rescind whatever consent, informed, parental or otherwise) that was ever presumed to exist. In late adolescence, I was subjected to a very degrading experience on Lackland AFB (as a brat, not a recruit) by a Capt or Maj. The officer in question was the son of an NCAA football coach(as famous as Paterno, Bryant, Hayes, Wilkinson or Royal!) and now a posperous San Diego radiologist. He went back to the O-club again the next day. I tried to live down the abject degradation the level of which a grandson of the composer of the National

March was spared. I hope he and like-minded colleagues choke on their success!

-- Angel, June 13, 2005

About male patients and gowns (10-21-02, 2-3-05, 2-7-05):

First, a quick word to the ladies: I strongly believe that female patients should always be offered gowns - especially if the doctor is male.

Now, to the guys: I agree with your posts. I'm male, and I decline the gown if the doctor or nurse offers me one. Gowns get in the way, and they slip and slide around too much. I prefer the good old-fashioned way, when the doctor or nurse just says, "Please strip down to your underwear and have a seat up here on the table."

My advice: If you don't want a gown, you're at liberty to refuse it. Thank the physician or nurse for offering it. Then politely get it across somehow that you're more comfortable without it. A little humor doesn't hurt, either. Here are a few things I've said to make my case. They've all been well received:

1) "You know, if I could just keep my briefs on, I really won't need the gown."

2) "Well, you know, I really won't need the gown. I'll be covered around the middle [in briefs], and there won't be any ladies in here anyway."

3) "Thanks - I'm really more comfortable without the gown. Gowns remind me of the hospital. I'll be covered around the middle anyway, so I'll be fine."

A good physical examination requires nudity. Fussing with a gown or playing the game of STRIP AS YOU GO is a waste of time. When my doctor begins to inspect, prod, tap, and listen, I'm more at ease if I've already stripped to 90% nudity. Then, too, it gives him a better chance to spot abnormalities. I know this from experience.

For instance, on one exam, my doctor caught a couple of skin problems that he couldn't have seen through a t-shirt or gown. I was able to get both conditions remedied right there in his office. On another exam, the physician detected a renal artery bruit. I doubt he would have heard it so easily if he'd been listening to my abdomen through fabric. Fortunately, the bruit cleared up by itself.

-- Jim, June 13, 2005

I just wanted to let those "modest males" know that athletes are not the only men supjected to physical exams by female doctors. At the practice I work at we deal with examining hazmat workers, firemen exsposed to burning chemicals and workers at chemical & energy plants who come in contact with toxic material. Due to the large numbers we deal with there is no time for a one one one exam in a private office. Simular to a group sports physical at a gym where you go to station to station thats how we do exams. We take x-rays, examine the skin all over the body (yes the examinee must be nude), take swabs from mouth, ears & nose, take a hair sample from various parts of the body for lab work, take vitals, etc. There is usually 2 male doctors & 2 female doctors along with a female nurse. Because the men are so used to going through the exam non of them seem to have a problem being nude during the exam, however the new employees are always taken aback by the exam and the presence of the female medical personal but they get over it after a couple of times. Guys don't make a big fuss over being examined by a female. Its an everyday thing throughout society.

-- Dr. Olivia P., June 14, 2005

I have read the (very very long) thread and I thought I should also put in my thoughts. I am a male and I am not particularly shy about my body, but when I go to a doctor I expect to receive the same level of courtesy and same level of care for my privacy and comfort as a female patient. Not one of those people who are saying that male athletes should get over the fact that women are going to see them naked have ever tried to tell the same thing to female athletes. I mean I know women doctors are professionals but so are the men in the medicine field, so why this DOUBLE STANDARD? I have not taken part in competitive sports at the college level and I can’t corroborate/deny the reports that male athletes had no option but exposing themselves, but my main concern is that if 50% of the people in medical field are men and the female athletes ALWAYS manage to get a female, why can’t men (who want a male doctor) get one? The complete BS that women’s right to equal opportunities for employment should supersede men’s right to privacy but women’s right to privacy can NEVER be superseded by men’s right to equal opportunities seems so prevalent that many conceited people involuntarily decide to go with the flow. This should be completely unacceptable an I would put my foot down whenever I can, not because I am shy but because I demand to be treated as well as anybody else.

-- Anonymous, June 17, 2005

To Dr. vanDenheuven. et al. Something CAN be done about past humiliation! Not

Enough, though! The ritualistic abuse

that many posters report ought to be

dealt with as a crime. What is done often is a felony even with an adult victim. Several patients banded together

can form and unstappable phalanx. If the prosecutor refuses to weigh in on the matter, civil law and the Court

of Public Opinion still offer some

redress to determined groups.

-- Jan, June 17, 2005

To the 'bad experience' poster.

When a problem occurs then I believe that a busy doctor with like 50 appointments per day can make time for you. I know from experience.

Years ago my father (who is still alive) was diagnosed with colorectal cancer. I was 14 at the time and my little sister was 9. We had to go for our annual physicals at a busy HMO place,with really crowded waiting rooms and lots of people. I was feeling the same way as bad experience was,my sister and I were undressed and I hated the fact that my mom was seeing my sister and I in just our underwear. Our pediatrician came in and she explained to us what she was going to do and why she needed us to be undressed for the exam. Then my sister chimes in and asks if she could get checked for colorectal cancer. The doctor asked why and my mother explained about my dad. The doctor went out and came back with an anatomy book and explained what colorectal cancer was and why it was very unlikely that my sister and I would be at risk at our age. It explained a lot to both of us,I felt like someone made time to give us this information. We both had our complete physical exams but our pediatrician took time out of her schedule to explain something to two very scared girls.

-- a good experience, June 17, 2005

I did not intend to go back on this sight since I didn't think it was worth arguing any further or simply stating an opinion to certain people on this "sight". Yet out of curiosity of what further comments people were posting, I decided to check back and now have something else to say, hopefully for the last time now.

I should have brought this up during my last message,part of which concerned Anwar. For one thing, I do have a distinction between voluntary nudity and sexual humiliation! It's only that you, Anwar, misinterpreted what both Fred and I were saying. I was not talking about doctors taking sexual advantage of their patients. I was simply talking about the uptightness of nudity in this society in general. I can see how patients would be offended if doctors tried to make advances on them, but what I was really commenting on was that I get the feeling that some people think a member of the opposite sex seeing them nude in any general situation is the end of the world--that is simply ludicrous, just like most of the U.S South happens to be with all their extremist way of thinking. I apologize for assuming that you were not from the U.S in general, but you're misunderstanding was rather upsetting. And I do have a problem with the country, or countries, I thought you were from, and for that I would speak out against them all.

I am also not trying to force any beliefs on anybody, I respect other people's opinions. All someone like me would ask is for toleration for people who are not so concerned with constant modesty as I explained in my last comment. Some people just are not ashamed or embarrased of their nude bodies,whether in front of friends, doctors, or just any one they feel comfortable with. There is a difference between that and sexual humiliation, but many people in this society just can't see it, but if they can't then just don't force it on people without the need for constant modesty and only wish to be free and natural.

And, Felicia, I am not thinking of an excuse to bash America on the whole. But to bash America on its hypocritical uptightness is a fact. Europeans are use to nudity, and don't see it as humiliatiing or shameful, in front of friends or doctors, and few are ever hurt by it. America should worry more about the violence going on in society, including sexual violence and abuse in prisons or anywhere it happens. America should not be going on and on like a bunch of crazed idiots about seeing a woman or man nude on TV, though not hardcore or gratitious crap, but just something beatiful and artful. No one should be judged for not being ashamed of their bodies, though I'm talking about people who expose themselves just to be fools or actual pervents, but people who feel free any where being natural is accepted. That's what I'm saying.

Well, I don't want to go off the subject this sight is speaking of, because I can go on and on too. I again just had to defend myself or anyone else who has no need for constant modesty. If people, men or women, have no problem with nudity in front of anybody they are comfortable with, including in movies, doctors, or beaches, all the more power to them!

-- Ross, June 24, 2005

I'm sick of the kvetching of md's and their supporters, who don't get their egos handled with kid gloves! They want patients to "lighten up". To the folk who have suffered employment examinations... remember that informed (or other) consent NEVER existed if there was coercion and NOBODY ever consented to the abuse described on this site. You also see why anyone familiar with labor history feels only

hate and anger towards the latter-day "Company Doctor".

-- Sasha/NYC, June 28, 2005

I went to a doctor a few days ago, and the

nurse took my weight and height. I was 158

centimeters and 53 kilograms....my bmi

turned out to be 22, and the doctor said it

was perfectly normal, but i don't believe in

her....i think she's wrong, coz i look

overweight....can someone please tell me if

it is correct or not? Thanks....Please Reply....

-- Kelly , June 29, 2005

I just like to ask about my experience at the cardiologist.

I am a 15 year old female and recently during a sports physical the doctor found a heart murmur.

I was sent to a cardiologist for an EKG and an Echocardiogram scan on my heart.

For the EKG I was asked ot lie on the exam table undressed from the waist up with no bra on. The doctor stuck lots of little pads with wires on to my chest including some over my left breast and during the echocardiogram he rubbed a really cold gel all over my chest then moved the scanner thing all over my breasts again whilst making me breath in and out.

Do this sound normal to you? I was so embarresed just lying there with no clothes on with all this stuff over my chest.

-- Rachael, June 30, 2005

When I was 16 my mother took me to see her gyn doc because she found out I was having sex. She was really angry with me for what I had done, and she wanted me to go on the pill so I wouldn't get pregnant.

I wasn't told what to expect.My mother staued in the waiting room while I met with the male docotr. He talked to me about the importance of birth control.

A nurse took me into an exam room and told me to take off all my clothes and get into a gown. She left the room while I got undressed and put the gown on. When the nurse came back in, I was put on the exam table with the nurse still in the roon. The doc came in and had me take the gown off my top and he did a very thorough breast exam, first with me lying down, and then sitting up, and then with my hands raised above my head.

After that he had me lie down and scooch down on the table. He had a warm light and he shined it on my privates and he was sitting on a stool on wheels. I kept having to schooch closer and closer to him. He had me put my feet into metal holders and had me spread my legs really far apart. The nurse was watching. He put his fingers inside me and then he began to tell jokes. He told me that all young men dream of growing up to be a gyn doctor and that when he was young he had wished that he could be a tampon. The nurse laughed and I thought this was the way these exams were for teenagers like me - a punishment for having sex.

I was so humiliated but I was afraid to ask him to stop because my mother was so angry with me and I thought she wanted the doctor to do these things. She didn't know that I had only had sex when I was really drunk. I had never let a guy look at me or touch me when I was sober, so it was horrible to have the doctor act like I was fine with him doing these things.

He put this metal thing inside me and spread me open and shined the light in there and put some big q-tip inside me. All the time he kept laughing with the nurse and telling sexual jokes. He made a comment that it was funny he had to use such small speculum on me because I was young.

I didn't know what he was doing to me or why he was doing it. I remember looking at the nurse - hoping for some sign that she could see how I was being violated but she was laughing with the doctor. After the doctor pulled the metal thing out I was all messy with some jelly stuff. He proceeded to put his fingers into my vagina and rectum at the same time. I was horrified but I was also in shock and I didn't know that I could tell him to stop.

When the exam was over the doctor gave me some pills. I rode home with my mother. I didn't say anything to her cuz I figured she had set up what happened to me and it was impossible to talk to her when she was angry anyway. When I got home I kept washing myself but I couldn't feel clean.

I finally talked about this to some one about 10 years after it happened and found out that it wasn't normal for a doctor to treat these exams like a sexual thing.

A few years ago I told my mother about what happened and she was so upset that I had been treated this way. She never even knew the doctor had done this exam and she was so upset that he had treated me like that.

I didn't deal with the feelings I had about this exam for years. I didn't think I had a right to feel so violated and humiliated because this was a medical procedure that women have done every day. I thought I was getting what I deserved for not being a virgin.

I have been diagnoised with PTSD from this experience. I am getting counseling and some of the feelings are getting less intense but it is still so difficult for me to get gyn care. I am so scared of being violated again.

-- still scared, June 30, 2005

Generally in Europe when you go for an annual exam it is understood that all you will get completely undressed and only rarely are gowns given. My sister and I were examined while we were both in the exam room. Of course we were both girls but the point is being naked in the exam room did not cause us any embarassment. One of my friends told me that in most parts of Asia it is customary for pre-pubescent children of different sexes, within the same family, to be examined together. Regarding pelvic exams which most girls are very anxious the first time, the mother of a friend of mine, let her daughter observe her own pelvic exam. I'm not sure if this alleviated any anxiety or simply made it worse, after all seeing your mother lying on a table spread eagled and legs in the stirrps would unerve me.

-- Anonymous, July 1, 2005

This might be off topic, but not relly. when I wss about 12 years old my parents sent me to camp in upstate NY. After a few days one of the counselors called me aside and told me to see the camp nurse. When I went to see he she told me that my parents had not sent or the camp had not received the results of my medical exam as required from all campers. Therefore she would examine me. The nurse was a woman of about 60-65, I'm not sure but I think she was actually a retired nurse. In any case she told me to take off my T-shirt, sneakers and socks. I thought this wouldn't be so bad if that's all she going to do. When I got up off the table she told me, to my shock, to drop my shorts and underpants. She proceeded to examine my testicles and penis and when she was finished handed me a cup and told me to stand over the sink and pee into it. When it was all finished and I went back to the bunk room in the camp and several other campers came over and asked if had to show the nurse my penis. Apparently it was well known by the experienced campers that any visit to the nurse for ANY reason would result in a full examination including the genitalia. Even if you whent to see her for a spained ankle she would have you strip.

-- Anonymous, July 2, 2005

Why do doctors take the temperature rectally? it is so embarrassing....plus....it is uncomfortable!!

Does anyone have any experiences like this? If you have had experiences like these, please make a reply to me!!

-- Nadya Widjonarko, July 4, 2005

I,m not sure I understand what your concern was. It was only you, your brother and the nurse in addition to the doctor that were in the exam room. It's not like you had stranger observing your exam. The only thing that would have bothered me was having my mother in the exam room while my genitals were examined, at least after I hit puberty. Till I was 10 my sister and I were examined at the same time since we were twins and being naked together didn't bother me. And one more thing, if you ever went for an exam at any teaching hospital you can be sure that medical students are going to observe the exam, your parents have to give permission but after that the can observe as well as assist the doctor.

-- Anonymous, July 5, 2005

When explaining what they are going to do Doctors should probably use less tchnical language. When I was 10 the Dr said he was going to examine my vulva and I thoght he was going to give me an internal exam like he gave my older sister. I immediately started crying until my mother explained he just wanted to examine my vagina.

-- Anonymous, July 5, 2005

I wasn't going to post again but I was

less than crystal clear. I refered to

sexual humiliation from the victims perspective and didn't mean to imply that medical people always got erotic

gratification out of the act. We're

talking about power and little else

This link between sexuality and power

is costing the USA a military defeat

because certain forces, including

MD's in uniform, thought they could

they could control Arabs and gain useful

intellinence (just like the French did in Algeria!) using torture and humiliation. Also, confidential to Nadya: The usual medical pretest for wanting a rectal temperature is that it more nearly approximates the core body temperature but this is an intellectual

bluff. The real reason is to be more invasive and violating.

-- anwar, July 6, 2005

When I was about 12 years old I developed a urinary tract infection. whe my mother took me to the doctor nobody told me what he was going to do. The treatment consisted of the doctor inserting a supository into my vagina. As I said I was 12 and had begun to develop breasts and pubic hair and the experience of lying half naked on a table with my legs spread traumatized me and I dreaded going for an exam for years. It also turned me off any kind of sexual activity till I was almost 19, I coulldn't bear to have a boy touch my breasts or genitals.

-- Anonymous, July 7, 2005

I really do not think any of you have anything to worry about being examined - we all have working parts of the body that sometimes fail us, so a physical is just like a "service" - like your motor car - you exam that every so often for reliability, so you must have a body exam for the same reason. Let's be practical, surely its sensible to be naked for a while while the exam takes place - yes it may feel uncomfortable to be handled in the "private parts" but it is all to our own good. The only complaint I have is why are we shown to empty rooms, made to strip naked and then have to wait a long time for a doctor to appear? I remember at a hospital visit, having to wait naked for nearly 30 minutes in a coldish room and then of course remain naked for another 30 minutes for the exam. Something which may amuse you, I was told that I would need to provide a sample of urine in the presence of the doctor. I purposely had a good drink before I left home and did not go to the toilet so I would have no problem giving it. At the hospital, I was given a pint of cold water to drink. Consequently I was bursting when I was given the jar for the sample. When I started going, I couldnt stop and the container was too small to hold it all, and it spilled all over my hand and body and on the floor! What an embarrassement!!

-- Anonymous, July 9, 2005

Dear annonymous who wrote on June 5th,

I think everything that occured at your physical examination was normal though it probaly made you feel uncomfortable because of your male physician. It usualy helps if a same sex physician examines the areas of your body that are PRIVATE. You must still speak to someone who you feel comfortable talking to because they can consult your father and you can switch physicians to maybe a female pediatrician or someone who specializes in adolescent medicine. Your doctor doesnt seem like someone you feel comfortable with and therefore he is not right for you.You can explain to your father if you are not comfortable with your physician you will feel uncomfortable telling him important information. You should speak with someone who you trust and if it has to be a woman how about a grandmother, a female neighbor, a teacher who you trust, a mother of one of your friends, an older cousin, and if for some reason none of these options are possible you must inform your dad of your feelings. Maybe it's best to talk with home one time when it's just the two of you and to adress him by saying DAD I don't really want to go to Dr. so and so anymore he made me feel uncomfortable amd now that I am getting older I would feel more comfortable with a female physician. You can use www.healthgrades.com or other webistes on the computer. Maybe you can ask your friends who their physician is and if they like them and why. If it is impossible you can tell me where you live and I can find one for you. GOOD LUCK!! write back 2 me when u get this message.

-- Brititany, July 10, 2005

Dear Dr. Olivia P, although the following account is no laughing matter, can you imagine what would have happened if the genders were reversed? The point is that all the people seem to be telling the men not to feel ashamed if they have to show it all in front of groups of females but nobody tells the same thing to females. It is not only the females who feel ashamed to be exposed in front of males, the males are also modest in front of females. So why this double standard?

http://watchtower .observer .org /apps /pbcs.dll /article? AID= /20040323 /JWAND SOCIETY1 /110160007

"Mabanga told City Press his protestations to the nurses not to touch his private parts, which had not been injured, fell on deaf ears.

He said he was suing the hospital for the pain he suffered because of the "unnecessary injection".

Mabanga sustained serious body injuries during the accident which were so bad he was unable to talk.

"While I was trying to tell the nurses, in writing, not to touch my private parts, an African female doctor said I thought I was too prominent.

"While I was suffering from pains, she instructed the nurses to strip me naked in front of female patients and ordered them to administer the injection," said Mabanga."

"Wanguhu acknowledged Mabanga was examined in front of female patients because the hospital was running short of facilities and wards."

The hospital authorities' attitude seems to be a clear vote in favor of males having no modesty concerns. The man was stripped naked in front of female patients because "the hospital was running short of facilities and wards". So instead of providing a privacy screen (or even two nurses holding a bed sheet in order to shield the patient) they had to have a separate ward, otherwise unfortunately the male has to have a painful Foley catheter insertion done right in front of female patients not to mention done by female nurses in the supervision of a female doctor.

-- Double Standard, July 11, 2005

Hi everyone

I am a 25 year old soon to be mom. I have been having a lot of pelvic pain and lower back pain. My OB says its due to the fetus pushing against the spine and pelvic muscles. She recommended a pelvic floor muscle massage? I agreed to have this done since I was in a lot of pain. I didn't know It involved sticking probes in my body though. I had a vaginal probe, and anal probe and a bladder probe. The probes create some electrical current thus relaxes your pelvic muscles also called a "TENS" ?? I do feel quite a bit of relief so I guess I can't complain too much about the massage. I must say I'm not used to having things put up my butt or bladder so that HURT and I could not relax so that added to the pain....but in the long run I felt a lot better after the procedure. My butt still hurts a little though :)

Has any other girls out there had something like this done ??

-- Christie , July 11, 2005

I've always fantasized about being examined by a female doctor and got my wish five years ago, when I was 36.

It happened during a routine pre-employment physical for my new job. First, the nurse, a older woman, took my vitals and urine sample, etc. I didn't know I'd have a female doctor until the nurse said "she'll be with you shortly.''

I got excited. And then I was pleased to see a young Asian woman -- she must have been in her late 20s and just out of med school -- enter the room.

She proceeded to do the usual things and saved the best for last. She told me to stand up and "drop everything.'' I was surprised she was quite flippant about it. I didn't want to see too anxious, so I think I said something like "excuse me.'' She repeated herself, "Drop everything.''

So I stood up, lifted the gown and dropped my briefs to the floor. Almost instantly, my penis grew erect. I even held the gown up around my waist to give the doctor clear access.

She performed the standard hernia test, having me turn my head and cough. I don't think she was happy to see I had an erection and it was inches from her face, but I was savoring every moment of this.

Unfortunately, it ended very quickly and she left hastily. I sometimes wonder how she would have reacted if I had ejaculated.

The next time I go to the doctor, I hope I see a female physican and that she will thoroughly examine by penis and testicles and give me prostate exam.

-- Tom, July 17, 2005

Get rid of those paper exam gowns and go back to cloth... we are not a piece of meat... The paper gown almost does no good at all... No modesty or dignity in one of them.. The cloth one at least stays where you put it.. and does not tear..

-- Gary Kushlan, July 18, 2005

My name is Katie and i am 17 years old soon to be 18. I am a healthly person for the most part and intend to stay that way. I am active in poms and I am a member of my high school swim team. My mother is an R.N. who works part time at a hospital and full time at a Doctor's office. When I found this site It was suprising to see how many people were down on Doctors. This compelled me to send a message about my story, in hope that other teen girls would post positive experiences about thier visits to their own Doctors. Maybe I'm lucky that my moms a nurse. She has always been straight with me about health issues. My mom took the time to explain to me what happens at the Doctor and why the Doctor does certain things. She made sure that I understood this before any exam I ever had. I had my last check-up about three weeks ago and have been seeing my Doctor since I was 13. His name is Dr. Lundy. When I arrived at the office, I was greeted by the nurse who told me to follow her down the hall. She did all the prelims for my physical. Height, weight, hearing, eyechart, blood presure etc... She marked everything down on my chart, then told me to get ready for my exam. Yes, I did have to undress and this is how it was done. I had to take off my shoes and socks, my pants and bra, but the nurse told me that I could put my shirt back on. So I sat on the exam table with my shirt and underpanties on. I have never had to wear a one of those gowns that everyone talks about in thier messages. Once the Doctor came in he said Hello talked to me for a while then he started my physical. He started with eyes,ears, nose,etc... Then he listened to my heartbeat and breathing. After that he asked me to lift up my shirt to examine my breasts. Now i know this is the part that some girls get embarrassed at. Just try to remember how important it is to have this done. The Doctor has to touch you to make sure you don't have any lumps. Once that was over he told me that he had to look down below, and asked me to lift up slightly and he slid my underpanties down off my feet. Then he asked me to draw my knees up and apart. While wearing a rubber glove he parted my labia and as he went he explained everything he was doing. Next he inserted two fingers into my vagina and pressed down on my tummy. Lastly he asked me to roll over on my hands and knees, this is when he examined my rectum by sliding a finger inside. I have to admit that this part was a bit of a shock, due to the fact he had never done that before. But, this was not the first time he had ever looked at my rear area before. It had always been a routine part of a physical. So to other girls out there realize how important it is to go to your Doctor. And try not to be embarrassed. Love and peace Katie St.Louis 17 yr. old

-- Katie, July 18, 2005

My 8 year old son had to go to a urologist because his pediatrican couldn't locate his right testicle. My son has been taught that those are his private parts and no-one should touch him there, unless medically necessary. My son also dosen't like slimey feeling things. When the doctor wanted to put gel on his fingers so it would be smooth as he went over the groin area--my son took a fit, but allowed the doctor to continue. My son started crying real hard and said the exam was hurting him--the doctor told me no it dosen't hurt him. My son was crying hard and his face was all red. After the exam this doctor said he was going to send our pediatrican a note saying my son must have other issues if he is carrying on this way. I think he wants my son to be seen by a physchologist. I never heard of such a thing, I'm furious--what gives these doctors the right to say it didn't hurt my son and feels my son has emotional promblems!!! We have enough to worry about his physical condition and these doctors start some off the wall promblem---we have enough to deal with. Did anyone ever hear of such a situation and is this illegal for this doctor to assume such an idea?? All info would be greatly apppreciated.... Thanks--Pittsburgh, Pa.

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2005

at my last doctor visit she said the next time i come in she wants to check me for skin cancer.i am what you could call a nervous patient and i forgot to ask what that is.what does a skin cancer exam involve?i do not know anyone who has had this exam.

-- Anonymous, July 19, 2005

I am an undergrad in a Ivy League school, and have to regularly visit the campus health service as I have high BP. Since it appears that most people writing to this site are young just as me, I hink I can share a few points about the doctors we have on campus who, I think, are ideal dream doctors that everyone are looking for.

First, there are EQUAL number of male and female doctors at each practice group and CUSTOMARILY students see doctors of their own sex. Second, for physicals there are male AND female nurse practitioners for physcials, so you don't have a male doctor and a female nurse and vice versa. Third, we have the option to know who our doctor is (which is true about NYC public hospytals too BINDING BY THE LAW.) Fourth, in case of ANY medical procedure, on or off campus, a patient HAVE THE RIGHT to refuse to be treated or examined by a doctor, and EVERY waiting room of doctors I have visited have a copy of the law lying around with PROCEDURES OF COMPLAINT "if needed". Fifth, at least the first time a doctor sees a patients he takes MORE time to explain procedures to the young patients than on the exam: which I believe is GREAT since unless you trust your doctor anything he does will feels wrong.

A doctor-patient relation must base on trust and respect. Most experiences posted on this site are description of physical exams, and except for a rare few all procedures described seem to routinely normal to me. But I can swear that if any doctor behaved the way as most doctors described here, HE WOULD GET NOT JUST FIRED BUT SUED.

-- Morgan, July 23, 2005

I reacently went to the doctor and i hated the abdominal exam she was so rough she pushed so hard and the steph was so cold and then on the ultrasound the same she pressed very hard why is this the pushing extremley hard

-- JENNA, July 23, 2005

For sure nobody can afford to miss Fred's advice above (December 24, 2004)

"I agree with Ross. All of this embarrassment about our bodies is entirely a cultural construct. It is possible to reject such irrational feelings and worry about things that really matter. Worry about the state of your health that the doctor is trying to ascertain. Disease can hurt you -- taking off your clothes cannot. Of course, I am not excusing any caregiver who purposely degrades or abuses a patient for his or her own entertainment. But why not be proud of your body instead of being ashamed of it? A change of attitude about this would save many of you a lot of grief. Try to reject some of the irrational things we've been taught in this society."

-- PR - INDIA, July 26, 2005

Exam rooms are not sound proof. You can hear everything that goes on the the room next to the one you are in. At The Shepards Center I heard the doctor instruct a girl to take off all her Clothes even her shoes, socks, pants, shirt, undershirt, bra, and panties. Then I heard the clothes come off of the girl becuase of the sound of her clothes hitting the wall and must have benn wearing a belt becuase i heard the contat of metal.

-- anonymous, July 29, 2005

I am a 19 year old girl. When I 13 I went to the Health Department for shcool exam. The doctor who was female to to take off all clothes even my shoes, socks, and bra, except for my underwear, all except for my underwear. I so embareested. I saw other girls in the witing room before I was called in and I am sure they had to undress down to their underwear.

-- Anonymous, July 29, 2005

are women really that inhibited when they go to the doctor. I went with my wife for lung conjestion and she took of her blouse without a wink of modesty. there she was sitting on the exam table nude from the waste up with me in the room. I asked about the way she approached this and she said no problem, he is a doctor.

-- jb, August 1, 2005

I would like to see a movie on a vaginal exam being done. i am only 18 years of a ge and never had one done before.so it ewould make me feel more comfortable to see one acctullay being done. so when i go in i will know what to expect. thanks

-- kristi byrd, August 2, 2005

I completely agree with "a doctor". I am a 36 year old pediatrician and conduct lots of physicals since I have a practice and I am also a School Physician at our local school district. In my practice, I tell all the doctors that the patient's health is number #1 and some embarassment now may save their life later. I always start my physicals with the patient in their underware:

Male: I'm going to need you to take off your underware so that I can examine your genitals. I'm going to be checking for hernias and lumps and bumps on your testicles. I am also going to make sure your penis and testicles are developing like they should. Anything you need to tell me? Any questions?

Female: Please remove your underware so that I can check your vagina. I am going to check the inside of your vagina and make sure there are no lumps or bumps. Anything you need to tell me? Any questions?

I always tell my patients what is going on and make sure they are not to intimidated.

-- Pediatrician, August 6, 2005

Dr's and staff exist to help the PATIENT.

I don't care how many people the Dr sees, It is the PATIENT, and even that patient's family, whose modisty WILL be protect at ALL cost. The convience of the Dr is NOT an issue.

Except for extreme emergency, there should always be two hospials, male to male and female to female.

As a male i KNOW it is impossible to see any female without calculating her suitability for sexual contact.

A little bit of common sence and cuth would go a long way toward solving the problems.

If a person has the gaul to complain about these matters the Dr had better heed the warning!

-- gwc, August 9, 2005

my doctor tries to talk to you and make you laugh during the pelvic exam. i just put my feet i the sturrips and don't pay attention. you can listen to music he has these headphones and he wears a mic so he can pause the music to talk to you. its accualy cool. just ask your doctor if you can listen to music or something to take your mind off of it during the pelvic exam. don't think your doctor is evil when he tries to act funny. he/she is trying to make you feel more comfortabe

-- Anonymous, August 24, 2005

My wife is from a south amercan country and she tells me that they don't require that a nurse be present during gyn exams.

One day she had to go to get a physical to get her residencey and came back from it very upset. She told me that she had a pelvic exam done by the doctor and that the nurse had to be present. My wife (like most of the ladies in that American Country) is very pretty and she felt the nurse was enjoying what she was seeing. I've meet other ladies from the part of the world who have also told me that they hate to have a nurse in the room when there having their gyno. exams

I now go with her to her exams. The first time i went with her to see a Kaiser doctor, the nurse called her name and we went into the exam room, the nurse checked her vital signs etc. then left the room. My wife was glade to see that she had left. The doctor started the exam. and as soon as he was ready to do the pelvic he called for the nurse to come in. My wife protested and told him that she felt uncomfortable with the nurse in the room, since the only reason for her being there was just to watch. She told him that she was not use to having a nurse in the room. The doctor told her that it was mandatory that when a male doctor checks a female that a nurse must be present. As soon as the nurse came in she looked in my direction and said that i would have to wait outside for that part of the exam. My asked her why and before she could answer i told her i was not moving that my wife felt better if i was in the room and besides she needed someone there to translate for her. The nurse claimed she spoke spanish but the spanish that she spoke was a watered down version of spanglish and my wife had a hard time commuicating with her.

To bad there has to be such perversion in this field that male doctors can't be trusted to examen female patients with out being accused of doing something unethical. Or worried about false aligations, I guess it works both ways.

-- Albert, August 28, 2005

Recently, I went to the OB/GYN and I felt that I didn't get a thorough exam. She did a breast exam in only the supine position and it took only 2-3 minutes. She didn't even switch sides. Next, she pressed on my abs and then moved on to the pelvic exam. After the speculum exam (which hurt like hell, but I didn't say anything), she did the internal exam and that was seriously 30 seconds....I didn't feel like she was checking anything...anyhow, they didn't ask for a urine sample and didn't do a rectal exam....aren't these necessary parts of the well woman exam???

Also....I read a lot of people being embarrassed being naked in front of a doctor, and I say "who cares", they are going to see all of you naked anyhow, why not just sit that way!

Thanks

-- Concerned Patient, September 6, 2005

After reading several posts, mainly about how patients are being "caught off guard" by invasive and embarassing exams, I have to wonder why an adult doesn't have the nerve to tell their own doctor 'no'. Personally, I don't think that being physically examined infront of a co-ed audience would be something I would accept. Why doesn't anybody say something BEFORE and stop ranting about how angry they are after it happened?

-- Jenny, September 10, 2005

THIS IS A MUST READ POST!

I'm in the medical profession and just happened to stumble on this site, which not only caught me by surprise, but made me absolutely sick to my stomach.

I can tell that it's obvious that some of the people that posted on this site are absolutely "full of it"

I've been around for a number of years, and I've only heard two true CASES like that. One consisted of a physician (male) examining teenage girls in that fashion. Long story short, he was arrested and charged with 60 (sixty) counts of molesting his patients. The physicals were conducted for driver's licenses and school physicals.

Here's the sad part, he was cleared because he examined ALL of his patients like that, and the patient had the right to "refuse". I have to mention that HE LOST HIS PRACTICE, HIS REPUTATION AND ISN'T ALLOWED TO PRACTICE MEDICINE IN THIS STATE ANYMORE. Guilty? who knows, but something like that can cause a doctor to lose his career because it was "unreasonable" for the type of examination being conducted.

The second one deals with a female physician that did physicals in a school. The teens refused the exams as they were completely unclothed and very intrusive. A few of the girls wanted to call their parents, but were forced to undergo the exams anyway.

Long story short there, BIGTIME LAWSUITS, class action and they were talking about criminal charges, because the children were "force" keyword. The only time you can force ANYTHING on a patient is when the condition is warrented, and it's a life threatening emergency.

Also, for the honest ones here, it's ok to be shy and you can refuse, or express discontent towards ANY physical.

I myself always leave on certain things and have absolutely zero intention of removing them unless necessary. MOST Doctors understand modesty issues, and will respect them. NO competant Doctor is going to risk YEARS of hard work, THOUSANDS of dollars of College, Medical school expenditures "just to see your privates".

If any of the stories above are true, then I suggest you talk to an attorney, but from being being around other health care professionals, I can almost GUARANTEE, that most of that stuff above is bogus, because competant physicans don't conduct themselves that way.

I think that most medical professionals would be highly offended by reading some of that stuff, because they simply "know better" and feel that such garbage has no place on a respectable medical site. That's probably why there isn't much medical pro/public interaction here, because they read it, and think "yeah right" and look for sites that have good quality questions and can provide expertise to people that want some decent answers.

For any of you telling the truth, you bet your rear end some of that stuff is wrong. If you're a kid and go for a physical you have the absolute right to refuse something, or object to the gender of your examiner. Most offices have a female doctor and even ASK what your preference is. If anyone "forced" your legs open or "held you down" it better be a medical emergency, or a life threat, because someone would lose their job, or be arrested.

Again, I want to express that most of this garbage is just that, garbage, quality Doctors don't behave that way, and really don't have time to play games with patients.

If you took your car to a mechanic for a brake job, and he told you you needed a new engine, would you not question that?

People come on here, let's distinguish whats real and what involves "fantasy" here.

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2005

I experienced a situation last week at a visit to the doctor. This was a follow up exam for a hernia injury I suffered last year. Because I'm 17 years old (still a minor in Arizona) there had to be a chaperone present. This doctor's office is new to me, required by mom's revised health insurance, and it seemed under staffed. So the doctor firmly stated to my mom that it was required she come in and be present during the exam. This was extremely embarassing for me. My mom hadn't seen me naked since maybe I was 8 or 9 and for her to be present now when I'm fully developed was extremely uncomfortable to me.

What choose does a minor have in a situation like this? Is this required by a doctor's liability insurance?

-- Liam, September 23, 2005

I'm a healthy 32 year old male in great physical condition.

I recently went in for a general physical because it has been two years since my last visit and I was just going for preventative reasons.

I left feeling a bit short changed.

The doctor I went to I had never seen before and was a referral from a friend. He was a male in his mid forties I'd guess.

So I was led into the exam room by a nurse and she weighed me in my street clothes and took my blood pressure and temperature. She then told me to put on a gown and the doc will be in shortly. So i undressed,put on that gown, kept my undies on and waited. doc showed up 10 minuted later. we chatted a bit about my health history. Not much to discuss. He then said he was goin to examine me. So he did all the usual head stuff and then had me lay down. he put another sheet over my lower half, lifted my gown and palpated my stomach. with the sheet covering me he had me pull my underwear down. So he just reached under the sheet and did a quick testicle exam. And that concluded my visit.

So did he miss something. Seems he could have. He never examined my skin. How could he have with all the sheet on plus the gown. And he never examined my genitals. Might have been emabarrassing but it seems like it should be necessary, especially for a sexually acitive man.

I read on hear that people are always embarrassed or humiliated getting a thorough exam. Well be blessed you doc cares enough about your health and less about you modesty. And I missing something? Shouldn't docs be doing a more thorough exam? Isn't my health more important than mild embarrassment. What's wrong with my doc? Or is this what most docs do?

-- Tod, October 5, 2005

hey... are there ways to relaxing your stomach when your doctor does an abdominal exam on you? it seems really uncomfortable for me.. and why does the doctor have to press deeply?.. it really hurts.

-- Anonymous, October 9, 2005

Well after seeing this thread over a period of time, I can only assume that a lot of the men posting here is as casual about being naked in front of a doctor, as they are at a nude beach or resort.

As a now 19yr old young woman, I want some say over how I am treated and while I do think there is an overreaction to some necessary nudity, a little respect is in order here.

The University of Michigan Medical School in 2003, I believe, had a piece done about women who were getting pelvic exams under anesthesia by students learning the business. In the end, there have been more policies put into effect that protect our rights as patients and as females.

Exams in this area are necessary but not by a bunch of people and still always with the permission of the patient. Personally I would refuse student(s) practicing on me, but that is just me.

Felicia

-- Felicia, October 11, 2005

I don't know what the big deal is about getting an exam from a Dr of the other sex. My boyfriend and I started having sex when I was 18 years old. After the first time we decided it was time for me to get on birth control. It was my first female exam and I knew what was going to happen from talking to friends. First the nurse took me into the exam room and took my temp and BP then handed me a gown and told me to take off all my clothes and put it on so it would open in front.

After a few minutes the Dr came in and we talked for a few minutes. Then he did the normal stuff like checking around my head and listening to my heart though the gown. When he was done with that he asked me to pull the gown down and take my arms out of the sleves so he could check my breasts. I was nude from the waist up while he did it, but it didn't bother me. I was just glad to find that my breasts were healthy. After I pull the top of the gown up he had me lay down and scoot to the end of the and put my feet in the sturips and spred my legs apart so he could do the pelvic. He checked the outside of me, then did a pap smear, then put two fingers in my vagina and felt around, then put a finger in my rectum.

From the time he walked in the room to the time he left it was all of about ten or twelve minutes at most. I was very happy to find that I was in great health and have had several more exams since than, all by males, and not once did I ever have feel embarrassed by them. If you're going to get naked for your boyfriend, then you have to get naked for the Dr. That's just the way it is.

-- Jenny, October 16, 2005

I recently had to take my girlfriend to the ER for an

angina attack. When she told the doctor that she

had had computer assisted bypass surgery some 20

months before, the doctor pulled up her gown to

take a look at her left breast and the scar

underneath. While she was subsequently

hospitalized, other doctors did this as well. What is

the medical necessity for viewing a 20-month-old

scar?

-- Charles, October 24, 2005

In Britain, it is professional for any doctor or nurse to explain to the patient what is to be examined,the reason for doing so, and any conclusions arising from the exam. Some quick exams are obvious, eg. nose, throat, ears, if the patient is suffering from flu like symptoms. However, if syptoms are more serious and undressing is required,then it is essential that the patient is put at ease and matters explained.

In hospital day clinics, a nurse normally would explain matters verbally before x-rays or seeing a doctor.

Having read through the comments made in the correspondence, I conclude that the majority of patients writing on this board have been mis-treated or unprofessionally dealt with and would therefore qualify for an official explanation or complaint on the conduct of the body exams.

-- Anonymous, November 4, 2005

Sounds like you guys in the USA have a horrible time, really do girls of a young teenage age need a gynae exam - smear tests are not really done here until the woman reaches the age of 25. To do that to a girl of such a young age (sometimes 14 as i have read on this thread) could be classed as abuse, its humiliating and degrading, it's disgusting. She should not really be having these exams until she becomes sexually active.

I hate having these exams here in the UK, but at all times i have been treated with utmost respect, always had my dignity and the doctor/nurse always explains what is going to happen next even though i have had the exam umpteen times before.

Speak up ladies in the USA and tell the doc that you are not happy with how things are going!

-- Jo, November 4, 2005

Doctors definitely need to be more understanding of first time patients. Because while they may have 20 patients a day, and it is routine to them, it can be traumatizing for the patient.

-- Anonymous, November 6, 2005

Just a couple of comments:

1. Someone needs to organize these comments by category or something. It's a mess.

2. If you genuinely are worried about going in for a physical exam, don't be. There's nothing to it. The "bad" parts (which really aren't that bad) don't last very long.

3. Don't believe everything you read on this page.

4. Current thought is that unless you are 50+ years old (or a child), or have a serious chronic medical condition, you probably don't need an annual physical exam anyway. Ask your doctor (a real doctor, not one online)

-- John, November 12, 2005

After I was diagnosed with melanoma and had it removed I underwent a series of full-body exams at the VA. All of the doctors turned out to be women. The first exam went fine. I kept my jockey shorts on, a gown was not used but we were both comfortable. To look at the rest of me she pulled down my underwear but did not look at the genitals. The second doctor told me to strip. I felt a little funny standing down naked but was not nervous and she was discreet concerning my penis. But during the next exam (same doctor) she told me to strip, remained in the room and told me it was easier without a gown. I was completely naked during the entire exam, she looked at my genitals but she was clearly uncomfortable. She made me very nervous. I called her later and told her that cannot happen again. She reacted testily but the conversation ended on a friendly note. The next exam, this time with a chaperon, went beautifully. She looked at the genitals but blushed heavily when I shook hands with her and told her "well done." The climax came during my final exam with her. I had to wait two hours, strip in front of her and a chaperon and was shown very little respect concerning the wait and the nudity. The chaperon stood right in front of me, criticized my nudity and the doctor did nothing. I complained to the head of the clinic and eventually got an apology. But now I feel like a marked man. I feel like an exhibitionist when in fact the doctor wanted to examine me naked and could have used underwear. She was clearly a very inexperienced doctor who could have been misled into thinking complete nudity was required. Or there was voyeurism at play. What do you think?

-- Anonymous, November 15, 2005

I am a 50 year old male and understand modesty sometimes must be secondary to health. But the double standard is real and obvious. If a female prefers a female gyn it is understandable, if a male prefers a male doctor he is sexist. It was a big deal tha female reporters be allowed in male locker rooms, so how does the WNBA handle it, no reporters in the womens locker room while they shower. If you have no concern for your modesty good for you, but do not be so arrogant to think you speak for every male. The issue would be mute if the instances of being nude infront of medical personel, especially opposite sex staff, was treated as a concern and not with such a cavilier attitude. I was amused listening to a Doctor on a plane discribe how awful it was being treated for appendicitist in his hospital becasue he had to be nude in front of the staff. I went to a local hospital to have my throat scoped and was forced to wear nothing but the ridiculous open back gown. A female co-worker had the same procedure at another hospital, she only had to remove her shirt & shoes and was given a gown. I know which hospital respected the patient, and which one I will use. If the sexes are ever going to be treated equally, it has to go both ways. Political correctness and respect for one's modesty should apply to both genders.

-- INDIANA, November 16, 2005

Just recently I had a new-employee physical (mandatory for a new job) at a health care office that contracted with my new company. The physical was covered under my new job, but I had no idea who the doctors were. I went to the walk-in clinic and they had me take a number. A nurse finally called me back: she had me pee in a cup, she tested my vision and hearing, vitals, etc, and then left me in the little room to change into the paper sheet gown. The doctor came in finally (a female) and she checked all the usual areas, but then she asked me to "lay down and slide to the edge of the table." I knew exactly what that phrase meant, especially when I noticed that she was slipping on a pair of latex gloves. I was in complete shock that she was going to examine my genitals for an employment physical. The whole experience was really uncomfortable. She separated my labia majora so wide I felt like she was stretching the skin, and when she was pulling back the hood of my clit she put a lot of pressure on it. She seemed to have spent a lot of time poking around down there. She didn't do a speculum exam, but she performed a digital/rectal exam with one finger in my vagina and the other in my anus. I was mortified. Has this sort of thing ever happened to people during an employment physical before?

-- Anon, November 20, 2005

I have had three traumatic experiences with doctors - two from the same one.

1. My husband and I scheduled a consultation with an urologist to discuss a vasectomy. I was ignored and my questions were ignored. The doctor took my husband next door to show him how the procedure was going to be done, but wouldn't let me come. He needed my signature on the consent form, but he couldn't show me how the procedure was done.

2. My husband developed a very swollen testicle. Our family doctor thought it was a hydrocele and said he needed to see an urologist. My husband thought he would go see the one that we saw to discuss the vasectomy. We went to the appointment and when the nurse called my husband's name, we both got up. She told my husband that she would have to check with the doctor to see if I was welcome or not. I was made to wait in the waiting room until the exam was over, then I was escorted to the room. I was furious and was screaming at the nurse and the doctor. I made the doctor re-examine my husband with me in the room as I had questions of my own. He got really smart with me, but re-did the examination. The result was a hernia and he referred us to a general surgeon. I told him to make sure that doctor was wife friendly because my days of sitting in the waiting room were over. We should have just left the office when the nurse stopped us, but we always think of these things after the fact.

3. I was scheduled to have an endoscopy and sigmoidoscopy at a local gastro office. I was scared to death of having this done. My husband had to be there to drive me home. I had convinced myself that I would be ok if my husband was with me. When my name was called, the nurse said that my husband could not even come back to the pre-op with me. I completely had a breakdown at that time. After a couple of hours of crying and being exhausted, the procedures were done. My husband was not allowed to come back in the recovery room because of the gas that the other patients were expelling. My husband said after the fact that he should have just taken me home and forgotten the procedures. Next time, that is what will happen.

Since all this, I have started having anxiety attacks and have developed a fear of doctors. I have to have my husband with me at all doctor's visits. I have been having nightmares for months and have started therapy. My therapist says I have been traumatized by these experiences. I am slowly working my way through this rough spot, but I have complained to the doctor's offices and have filed a formal complaint with the state medical board on both offices. My husband and I have decided that from now on, whenever we feel like we are not getting the treatment we deserve or are being treated unfairly, we are just getting up and leaving. There are two many doctors out there that would be sympathetic to our needs to stay with those who don't give a crap about nothing. Who are these doctors to tell us that our spouse of 17 years cannot be present in a room with us? Not our doctors anymore, thank God!

-- Kim, December 1, 2005

Today I went to see this surgeon about enlarged lymph nodes I have in my neck. The irony is that I chose him myself since he saw my husband once and I wanted a second opinion from older and experienced surgeon, to get rid of my fears. He checked the neck, then checked my armpits to see if there are any there and then started breast exam. I didn't get a chance to tell him on time that I suffer from fibrocystic breasts and it was first day of my period, when they are most painful and swollen, because he was already "digging" deep causing me a great pain and then pinched the nipple real hard I almost cried. I had clinical breast exam in the past and what he did was technically correct (although he is not one of those gentle doctors), which I would normally be OK with, but what really worries me is that they never examined me before during this time when they are in process of swelling and so tender. I am so in pain now and afraid that he caused some tissue damage that could later develop into breast cancer. Does anyone know if breast injury or hard pressure can cause development of cancer?? I am so afraid now and I wish I didn't go to him cause I feel he might have caused me more harm than good. Do you think I am being paranoid here? God bless anyone who finds a little time and good will to help me out here cause I am really overwhelmed with fear.

-- Jenny, December 7, 2005

Too many people seem to be more concerned about their modesty than they are about seeing that they are fully examined.

Personally, I want a doctor to do a very thorough exam in order to find things before they progress very far.

Being overly modest during an exam could end up costing you the time that makes the difference between a simple solution to a problem and far more extensive treatments.

I have had physical exams done at a teaching hospital where the doctor and students barely had room to stand. Not that big of a deal to me. I was a teenager when this was done and it didn't seem like a problem to me.

-- Mark, December 8, 2005

Since I was a teenager I have always suffered from what I can only hope is Irritable bowel Syndrome. My symptoms have been flatulance, Irregulary formed Bowel Movements, often accompanied (or sometimes nothing else but) mucous. I have always refrained from going to the Doctors for fear of how the examination might go. This week, I have finally built up the courage to make an appointment for next week but am still far from sure whether I will keep it. Reading this sight has filled me with dread and just confirmed my worst fears of what may happen at the Doctor's office. The thought of having to undress and have a stranger stare at my bottom or worse actually insert things into it is awful. Has anyone been to the Doctor's with similar symptoms and what kind of exam were you given.? Is it a given that I will be examined 'back there' or is an abdominal examination suffiient? Also, should there be any reason why a nurse should be in the room at the same time?

Woried,.... no petrified.

-- anonymous (25 years old), December 9, 2005

I agree: people should post their positive experiences as well as their concerns. I had a well woman's physical just last week that was very positive. I have been seeing my doctor for many years and each annual physical he performs is always the same. First, I am asked to change into a slip (not paper, an actual sheet or cloth slip-over). I take everything off except my socks. When the doctor comes in he starts with an examination of my ears, eyes, nose, heart, and skin. He looks at my posture and balance, too. I am always impressed about how thorough he is. When he is ready to do the breast exam he buzzes the nurse who stands by my side. I admit, it's weird having a woman in the room just to watch, but it's better than being in there alone with him. He does a standard breast exam sitting up and laying down. When he's ready for the pelvic, I know because he goes to his drawer and puts on his rubber gloves. At this point I know to scoot down to the edge of the table. He does not put my feet in stirrups, but rather asks me to lift my knees back and hug them to my chest. This is actually a very comfortable position, as awkward as it may sound. My arms hug my knees back the whole time, for the pelvic and the rectal exam. The doctor does an external exam, which includes inspecting my hair distribution, and checking the labia for lumps or irritation. He looks for discharge and milks the urethra to see if any comes out. Then he inserts two lubricated fingers into my vagina and moves them around while pressing on my stomach. When he's done with that, one finger stays in my vagina and another finger enters my rectum...all the while with me hugging my knees tight. It's very comfortable. You guys should suggest it next time, and it offers the doctors extremely good visualization of the genital area.

-- Anonymous, December 10, 2005

Whats the big deal? Would you be uncomfortable taking your car to a mechanic that doesn't own a car? Its the same thing, My doctor is a guy, he doesn't have a vigina, he's not doing anything sexual what's so emberresing he examines me and i leave plain and simple. Who cares its not that important their gender just spred your legs and let them do what you came for

-- Anonymous, December 11, 2005

I have a situation dealing with my 17 year old son. He wrestles for the local high school. A day before the competition there is a mandatory weigh-in and exam by a dermatologist (to make sure there are no rashes, sores or contagious skin diseases). The dermatologist hired by the school district happened to be female in her early thirties. I and a few of the other parents found it odd that a female doctor would be allowed to examine a group of nude males, who happened to be in their teens and fully developed I might add. This is totally against my religious beliefs.

What choice do parents have in a situation like this?

Surprise, AZ

-- Harvey, December 13, 2005

The "must read" post of 9/11 (2005) as well as posts from physicians make

me puke! I wrote to this site with what md's condescendingly label

"concerns". I resent,to the point of hatred. the conjecture that my narrative is not true! The theory that a sexual fantasy in involved only adds

to the crime of condoning rape, sodomy or both. I know what I experienced and the subsequent trauma. Shame and the realities of civil law kept me from even bothering to seek justice before a court. Some posts may be exercises in creative writing but I read enough that rings true on this site to know that I'm not the only one

to come up against this green wall of silence.

-- Carmen, December 15, 2005

I recently had a rectal exam by a female nurse practitioner. She was very professional with one exception. She did my regular check on thyroid listened to my heart and lungs. She then did the regular organ check stomach liver etc. Then told me to get undressed to my socks and put on gown i knew then she was going to give me a rectal the problem was my primary care physician sent me for colonoscopy. When I had called the Gastroenterologist office they told me that i would be seeing the Nurse Practitioner then the doctor I falsely assumed the doctor was going to do the DRE i just don't think its right to be kept in dark so to speak on who will do exam. I have no complaints except why do they not disclose that she would be doing exam and why didn't she tell me and just spring it on me. She did fine job very professional otherwise. I just don't like surprises I didn care about chaperone for her but they seem so hesitant to tell you anything till last moment just so unprofessional. I think doctors need to be taken down a peg very inconsiderate and its like there chickens afraid to talk to patients.

Richard

-- Richard, December 25, 2005

When I was 10 years old my mother took me to the Doctor for my annual exam. This was a doctor I had never been to before, with my mother in the exam room he told me to get completely undressed and a gown was not offered. The embarrassing part was not the exam itself but his pointing out to my mother how I was beginning to develop physicaly, for example he showed my mother the beginnings of my breast buds and he showed her while I was lying on the table how my labia were becoming more rounded indicating that I was starting to develop. He also told my mother that he wanted to perform a pelvic exam after I had my first period. In finishing the exam he had me lay on my side and he inserted a finger in my rectum while he pressed on my stomach. When I told my mother how embarassed I was by the exam she thought I was being silly.

-- Anonymous, December 26, 2005

Has this ever happened to any other women. During my last pelvic exam I neglected to empty my bladder before the exam. During the exam while the doctor had inserted two fingers into my vagina and was pressing on my lower abdomen I felt an extreme urge to urinate and I told the doctor so. Instead of letting me get up to pee in the adjoining bathroom he positioned a basin under me and told me to relieve myself. Since I couln't hold it in any longer I just urinated till I was empty and the nurse had to wipe me before the exam could continue.. To say the least I was humiliated, in addition he made a joke about how I must have been holding it in for at least a day. The nurse thought it was funny, I guess watching a women in stirrups pee was the highlight of their day. The last time I could remember something as traumatic as this was when I was 6 or 7 and the doctor put me on a bedpan in the exam room for me to defecate into get a fecal szmple and I couldn't for at least 15 minutes.

-- Anonymous, December 30, 2005

I posted here a little over a year ago about my 16-year-old daughter's

"well teen" physical exam, and I'm wondering if any parents here would like to exchange info on what their teen's exam included. From what I've learned, many physicians do a somewhat more inclusive exam on teens at the age of 15 or 16. My second daughter, now 15, will be getting her "well teen" checkup in two weeks. Please post here or contact my via e-mail if you'd like to exchange experiences. Thanks.

Martha

-- Martha in IL, January 4, 2006

This is a response to Anonymous who questioned events at her pre-employment physical.

I am a nurse practitioner working in an OBGYN setting. While we do not normally perform pre-employment physicals, I have had quite a bit of personal experience conducting complete physical exams on both males and females.

The events you described do seem a bit much for a pre-emplopyment physical; however nothing you mentioned would indicate improper treatment on the part of the clinician, except for your mention of skin pulling, prerssure, and poking.

Examination of the female genitalia includes visual and tactile examination of the vulva. The labia majora are usually examined with thumb and forefinger, from top to bottom, looking for nodules or lumps. The labia minora are likewise examined from top to bottom, with the labia minora be separated so that each side may be examined. The clitoris is always examined, and retraction of the clitoral hood is normally necessary in order to visualize the clitoris itself. Doing so also affords the clinician the opportunity to assess adhesions which may be present between the hood and the clitoris.

The introitus (entrance to the vagina) is inspected visually and manually and the Bartholin glands are palpated at the entrance.

The rectal exam you described is actually a rectovaginal exam, usually performed with the clinician's index finger in the vagina and the middle finger in the rectum.

I'm sorry you were mortified. Was it the rectal exam that caused you the most discomfort? In our clinic we always perform a rectovaginal exam on each patient and most of our patients are not mortified.

If you have any questions, feel free to contact me.

-- Diane, January 7, 2006

I have never ever bought this 'male doctors are professionals so they dont get gratification from seeing and touching naked females'thing. Furthermore, what motivates a man to become a gyno doctor in the first place? Why would a man chose to specialise solely in examining women's genitals? Think about it: A career which consists of looking at and prodding and touching vulnerable naked women and girls in their most private parts. What on earth would guide a man to make this his career? An interest in medicine? Yeah, right. There is any God's amount of medical fields with good men and women in them. We all know how many peadophiles and perverts become scout masters etc. I rest my case.

anon.

-- Anonymous, January 9, 2006

If the girls victimized in the letter of Sept. 11 were in Monroe County, Pa;("must read") then the writer is really full of it himself. I lived in Quakertown and there was no big time award and none of the girls abused could pay for a Seven Sisters education with the damages. I'm certainly not condoning nuisance litigation or abusive process but the legal deck is stacked against people especially children and teenagers mistreated by health professionals who refuse to respect boundaries.

-- Valya, January 10, 2006

It is 2:51 am and I can't sleep because my wife and I are seriously considering a divorce after 24 years because she has a Dr. appointment at 9:00 in the morning and the Dr. wants to do a pap smear, which will probably include a pelvic and breast exam. I am against it. I hate doctors! I hate doctors. I said, "I hate doctors." The do way too many embarassing exams at my expense.

My wife thinks she is to be freinds with them and would rather jump in the stirrups to keep them happy than to tell them no.

Of course the doctor will find some reason to want addtional tests, like sending her to another doctor for addtional breast exams, or requiring a pelvic sonogram, or God knows what else if the pap smear comes back other than normal.

Then he is going to want her to get these in-humane embarrasing, unnatural humiliating tests each year, and I would really prefer to punch him in the nose, and kick him in the ...

But, I am a minister and not supposed to act like that.

Is there anyone that feels these doctors are perverts?

-- Anonymous, January 12, 2006

hey,i am in agrrement with the guy who wants to know how to relax his adomen wene the docter does the adominal papaltation.i also fine it uncomfortable and it make me feel a little uneasy knowing he is preessing down on my body between my beely botton and my genitals.if any one can tell me how to do a self exam i would sure apprecaite it. thanks. yes i also agree that it does hurt.i have told my docter that when he proformes the adominal and stomich papaltion that it makes me feel stange and he said that he understands how i feel,so he trys to make it as breaf and as painless as posible. he has always understood how i feel .

-- tom, January 18, 2006

I am a 30yr old male. Trust me, I used to be quite shy about my body but after what I've gone through the past year and a half I got used to being exposed to male and female doctors. Believe me if you thought something was wrong with you, you wouldn't care what gender they were.

In the summer of 2004, I slipped off a ladder at my parents house and badly strained my groin causing on off my right testicle to retract into my body. I was brought up in a very modest environment and having to pull down my pants and underwear and being examined by my own male GP was daunting for me. After having my groin and testicles examined standing up and lying down, my doctor told me it was muscle and ligament strain, gave me some painkillers and told me to take it easy for a few weeks.

6 months later one morning I was walking to the local shop when I got a sharp pain in my groin and my right testicle shot back up again. I nearly passed out and later that day I went back to my doctor. I went through the same exam again but the doctor could not pinpoint if I had a torsioned testicle so he referred me straight to the A&E.

Upon arriving in A&E, I was seen by a doctor. I was told to pull down my pants and underwear and lie on a bed where he examined me behind screens. After taking blood and a urine sample I was told to wait again. Another doctor arrived. I was sent to another bed and told to do the same again, and wait again. Then the Registrar came. He was a foreign doctor. I was directed to a bed and told to do the same again where the Registrar and the 2 previous doctors examined me, this time no screens and a middle-aged woman in the bed next to me being attended by a nurse and female doctor, and a whole crew of patients and doctors passing by.

I was sent up the next day to the Cancer Unit. There I was taken to a long narrow room where I underwent the same pants down, stand up, lie down exam by a male doctor & a student female doctor. I was sent then for an ultra-sound exam. As I lay on the bed wainting for the ultra-sound guy with my pants around my ankles there was this elderly nurse busying around me getting me ready. After the exam I was asked to come back the following day.

In the surgeons room I had to do the same again pants down, etc, where I was examined by a surgeon with another nurse in the room. He gave me an all clear for any testicular cancer and I was relieved but I was refered to another surgeon.

2 weeks later I went to see this other surgeon. Samething again. He thought it was a spasmed cremaster muscle and I was sent down for another ultra-sound exam to a different department. About 2 weeks later I had to see the surgeon and he confirmed that it was a spasmed cremaster muscle.

About 2 months later I was called back to the hospital to see another surgeon. I was examined by the surgeon and then by another Registrar. The confirmed they could not operate as the muscle is minute and inoperable. So, I'm stuck with this problem although over the past 6 months the pain has eased. Now I've got to go to see a pain managment specialist.

So, in the space of a couple of months I had my genitals exposed and manhandled by 11 doctors and numerous others (nurses, etc). All of these people are professionals, sometimes imperfect, but they are there to help you and not judge you. I think the more uptight you are about your body the more impact physical exams have on you. I was up tight about it in the begining but now I see nobody's body is perfect but doctors, of whatever gender, is not looking at that, they are looking at the problem only.

-- Paddy, January 21, 2006

Wow...I FULLY BELIVE THE CRUEL STORIES HERE. I

was a victim of abuse. MEN ARE SENSITIVE TOO YOU

IGNORANT BASTARDS!!!!!! GOD!!!!

I am only 16 now and i have been suicidal due to

the forced exam I was given. I was EXTREMELY

MODEST and REFUSED many exams but eventually

my paents literally higher guards and I was dragged

into an office kicking and screaming and crying and

given a rigourous exam with many people

present...I was too busy screaming to really get

much of it...but holy hell...if you think giving your 8

year old son a testicle check is THAT necessary, I

advise you to rethink your decision if they refuse.

As I said, this has caused suicidal thoughts all

through my life...It was the most traumatizing

experience I ahve ever had and I will never go to

another doctor again, other than cosmetic. I would

PREFER to DIE of some undiagnosed disease instead

thanks to this experience. And it is all too true. The

medical profession is disgusting...

The only way I can cope with it is to continually

relive it and I have turned it into some sick and

twisted fantasy now...that is the only way I can deal

with it....that think of it as a fantasy...I want to die..I

see I am not alone now though...

STOP WITH THE SEXIST COMMENTS ABOUT MEN

THOUGH. WE HAVE EMOTIONS TOO!

-- Julian, January 27, 2006

One thing I have learned is that it is not necessarily the gender of the physician that matters but rather the person himself.

I had always gone to female doctors for medical exams and I insisted on having a female gynecologist. I would get my pap smear done and it would hurt a bit and I thought that it was part of life. I also noticed that some women are quite rough w/ their hands and don't have as much manual dexterity.

Then I moved and got pregnant. Because of my desire to have a home birth, or a non-hospital birth, the only doctor available to me was a male. Given a choice between going to a hospital to have my baby versus having the opportunity to consider a homebirth, I decided that if the doctor was well qualified and well respected in the community (which he was), I could put aside my preference for female physicians.

I saw the Dr. the first time for my first visit. He was the kindest, gentlest and most wonderful doctor I had ever known. He was very considerate, but most of all, his fingers were very gentle and the pap test did not hurt at all -- I barely felt it and he was done quickly.

Most of all, when he conducts the exam, he makes you feel very comfortable, and I noticed that he looks away at something else when doing the breast exam and also the pelvic exam.

While they are never fun and always a tad uncomfortable, I am very pleased with my doctor and don't know what I will do when he retires!

For this reason, I no longer care if the doctor is female or male. I just care that a thorough exam is done so that I can remain healthy.

-- Anonymous, January 27, 2006

When I was about 10 I remember one exam which I think traumatized me although it seems silly now. I was at the cusp of puberty, my breast buds had started and I noticed the faintest beginnings of pubic hair. Once in the doctors office the nurse led me to the exam room with my mother and told me to disrobe. Not understanding what disrobe meant I asked her and she said take off all your clothes and your undrewear. The traumatic part begins when the doctor comes in and after taking my weight and height tells me to walk to the end of the room and back again. I dd this three or four times and he told my mopther that this was a way to determine if there were any neurological problems, apparently a persons gait reveals a lot of information. The rest of the exam was pretty standard heart, lungs, ears, nose, throat. Palpating under my arms, abdomen, examining external genitalia, opening my labia and visually examining my anus. All this seems fairly routine including I guess the walking naked part but when it came for the getting a urine sample part I will never forget it. The Doctor said he needed a clean sample which has he expained it meant that the urine should come straight out of the urethra into the cup eithout touching the sides of the vagina. He told me I shoul sit on the toilet but face the other way, in other words straddle the toilet with my legs spread and with one hand open my labia and pee into the cup held by the other. When I said I didn't think I could do that he told the nurse to go with me into the bathrrom. I thought she was going to hold the cup instead after sat down and positioned myself she gave me the cup and told me to hold it and without a word reached down and with her thumb and middle finger spread my labia and told me to "Okay dear start peeing into the cup". I was able to manage a couple of ounces of urine but the whole thing was so strangs made even more so by the fact that when I finished she reached for a tissue and instead of giving it to me so I could wipe myself she did it for me and gave me this advice "always wipe yourself from front to back".

-- Anonymous, January 30, 2006

My doctor told me that my labia were too large and that it would be a source of irritation and discomfort and that I should think about having them surgically reduced in size. Since I was 15 at the time I didn't like the idea of surgery down there. Did this doctor think there was a correct size. I wonder what a boy would think if the doctor told him his penis was too large and should be reduced.

-- Anonymous, January 31, 2006

Anyone who thinks Doctors in this country are not concerned with a patients modest has never experienced what passes for it in Russia today or the former Soviet Union. When I was 15 the middle school I attended was scheduled for their annual medical exams spread out over a two week period. The day of my exam I reported to the local clinic and was ushered, along with 100 or so other boys aged from 12 to 18 into a room where a middle aged matron announced that we were to remove all our clothes, watches ,jewelry, etc and place them in lockers. After we had stripped we all stood around waiting for our exam. During this period people would come in and out of the room, some were medical personnel but most were not. Our names were called in groups of about 10 and we reported to a woman clerk who couldn't have been more than 18 or 19. While we were standing there in the nude she asked each our name and DOB and gave each of us a folder to carry with us throughout the exam. The exam process was more like an assembly line, you went from one clinician to the next with each one only examining part of you. The examiners were either middle aged matrons or young women. When it was time for our genital exam the woman who did this was about 20 and she took about 30 seconds to check for hernia, feel the testicles and penis and place two fingers in your crotch while she put upward pressure on it.The final part was of course the rectal exam and for that they had two women who had a supply of gloves next to them, we would walk up to an exam table and bend over it while she very quickly inserted a finger in the rectum, pull it out, discard the glove and move on to the next.Urine would be collected in an old fashioned enamel hand held urinal that we would hand to a clerk who pour some of the urine into a small glass with a paper slip with our name under it.My GF told me the exams for the girls were just has bad. If the girl was 15 or older she would be given a pelvic exam with exams taking place in a fairly open area with only curtains between the tables. At one point she told me they ran out of speculums because the autoclave broke and so what they did instead was the nurse or whoever was performing the exam would insert two finger from each hand into the girls vagina and spread the innner and outer lips apart. I almost forgot, for our chest xray we had to walk into to hallway, still naked, and walk 100 ft or so to the facilities with women, girls, boys, children all around us and waited in the corridor till our turn. Funny thing, everyone who who worked there hardly noticed.

-- Peter, January 31, 2006

I was appalled by the minister that was considering divorcing his wife after 24 years of marriage because she had to have a pelvic/breast exam done. I am a Registered nurse and I am also a woman. First of all, yearly "well woman" checkups are not at all something that any woman looks forward to but it is extremely important to have it done.To make the comment "she jumps in the stirrups" like it is a big party to be poked and prodded is ridiculous, disgusting, and immature. I work on an oncology floor and I have taken care of many women that have lost their battles with cervical, ovarian, breast, etc. cancer because they were too humiliated to be examined by a gynecologist. The exam takes a total of 5 minutes and it is the best feeling to walk away and know that you are healthy. How could this minister not care about the health if his wife? My husband comes to all my checkups with me and is happy to know that I am healthy when we leave and it is nice to have his support and love. If I were this minister's wife, I would leave him and find someone that was concerned about my health and my well being.

-- Elizabeth, February 1, 2006

Before I could enter high school, I had to go get a physical exam. This was in 1983. At one point during the exam, I was laying on the patient table with only my underwear on. The doctor took my underwear off, and then he measured my penis and each testicle with a ruler. Nobody I've talked to has had this experience. What does this mean?

-- Anonymous, February 10, 2006

I have long believed -- and reading these posts confirms it -- that the most important elements of any health procedure are listening and communication.

During the time a health professional spends with you, you should be the most important person in the world. You should be listened to, and everything that is to be done to you should be carefully explained.

Although there are health professionals who sexually abuse patients, they are in a tiny minority. What is much more common are those who abuse patients in other ways, by being gruff, preoccupied, impersonal, assuming, self-aggrandising, or uncaring. If you should find someone like that, take your business elsewhere.

-- Doc, February 12, 2006

As a patient, I think that there are three major factors that change the whole picture:

First: My experience is that doctors are generally truly dedicated people, who really want to help. HOWEVER they are also harassed and overworked and are often numbed, by years of medical practice, to the feelings of the patient – whether those feelings are fear, physical discomfort, pain or embarrassment. This is often (albeit not always) the source of the feeling of lack of consideration or lack of sensitivity on the doc's part. It is true, however, that some docs show more understanding than others, and there is also an individual patient-doctor "matching" – my doc may be great for me, and less so for others. It's a question of being on the same "wavelength". Recognizing these truths helps a lot. It is also important to know that the medical profession as a whole is becoming more and more sensitive to such issues, and addresses them directly.

Secondly: I found it is extremely important to have an excellent Primary Care doctor that you trust and feel comfortable with. This changes the WHOLE picture, as to the Primary Care doctor, and as to the specialists you may be referred to as well. For several yrs after our marriage, my wife and I went to a well known family doctor, but then we left him because my wife felt uncomfortable: not because of modesty, but because she felt he "talked down" to her. I agreed with her immediately: there is no point in going to a doc if you feel that way! I felt it important that we have the same family/primary care doctor, and she felt a female doc would be less likely to be condescending, and that is how we got to Dr. T.

Before I go any further, I should explain that I have no problem with female practitioners, and this is why: When I was 15 yrs old, I had a tremendous hernia. I was just developing, and didn't know what the heck was wrong with me. It didn't hurt, but sure looked strange. I finally confided with the school nurse, and after some persuasion let her have a look. She diagnosed me immediately, and the doctors later told me I was very lucky, because walking around with this kind of a hernia I could have caused real damage. This made me feel more cooperative, soon after, when at the hospital the surgeon asked me if it would be O.K. to have an intern (female) with him, as she checked me with him before and again after the operation. To this day I am very grateful to the nurse, and feel she really saved me.

Back to Dr. T. Dr. T is a true professional as well as a wonderful person, and I trust her. When I had an inflammation of the testicles, she fit an appointment with me on short notice. I was in pain and quite afraid. She calmed me, checked me, and I felt comfortable with her professional approach to my nudity. To be on the safe side – and possibly because I was so obviously afraid – she called the urologist after getting an initial impression of my situation, and checked me again as per his instructions on the speakerphone, discussed the appropriate treatment with him, and then referred me to him for a follow-up.

On a different occasion, after I complained I was feeling generally low, she sent me for extensive tests, and only then, very gently, asked if I might be under stress or depressed (which was the case), and referred me to an excellent psychologist who was very helpful.

Dr. T always follows up on her referrals, including asking how the specialist related to us. On one occasion, when I told her the urologist hurt me in a DRE, she made a note to talk to him. This feeling, that everything gets back to her, effects the way the other docs treat me, and more importantly, gives me the feeling that I have an ear for my complaints when they arise.

My second conclusion is obvious: get a good primary care doctor. Don't wait 'till you're sick – then you won't have the time and energy. DO IT NOW. Ask friends; Talk to the doctor; Compare. And then make a choice, and stick to it - until you have a reason to change it.

Thirdly: Speak up. If you don't feel right – say so. Tell the doctor, tell his/her superior, tell you insurer, tell your primary care doctor. My wife recently felt uncomfortable when a doctor at the breast clinic took her medical history while examining her breasts. She told the head of the clinic, he understood and they both apologized explaining that he was behind schedule, but that she was right. As I said, most docs really do mean well. If they aren't making you feel right – just tell them so. 9 times out of 10 – it will make a big difference. The remaining 1 out of 10 – just change the doctor.

-- Jake, February 19, 2006

I have AIDS. So I have been compelled to see doctors

more often than I would have liked. They have made

my life a living hell far worse than having AIDS. My

experiences with them are horrifying, humiliating,

invasive, degrading, abusive, and I have stopped

seeing them. I refuuse to disrobe for one more

paternalistic doctor. I have gotten away with obtaining

medication now for for over a year without having to

see one and my health has been far, far better than

when under any doctor's care. But I will have to see

one for continued medication soon. It will be war. But I

would rather die than be abused ever again.

-- Anonymous, February 25, 2006

During college I went to an allergist as I have had asthma and allergies most of my life and needed to be re-tested and possibly to do allergy shots again (after having take several years off). Following the medical history, the doctor left and I was asked to undress. I was unsure whether to take off my pants as in my experience allergy exams had typically only involved looking in nose and mouth and listening to breathing followed by allergy prick tests on my back and arms. However, in the absence of any specific instruction, I decided to undress to my underwear like a normal physical.

The doctor did in fact look in my nose and mouth and listen to my heart and lungs. THen he looked at my palms and asked me to get off the exam table and to take off my underwear. He looked at my fully nude and then had me turn around to look at the back of me. Then he had me lie on the table on my back, still completely undressed, and he spent what seemed like a very long time palpating my abdomen and my testicles.

At the end of the exam, he commented that he had needed to examine my skin for any reactions. It was after it ended that it struck me that this all seemed very out of the ordinary. Does anyone agree that one should not have this type of exam for asthma and allergies?

-- David, February 28, 2006

Reading these comments scare me even more about my possibly first "complete" exam coming up. I am 36 a virgin and have never had a pelvic because I was always told that it was not necessary unless A) you were having problems, B) you were or were about to become sexually active, or C) 40 years old or older. Breast exams I can handle. My peditrician started those when I was a kid with my mom present so now I'm pretty ok with it. I am going to have a male exam me. I can hear women groaning but every time I have had a female doctor I had problems. One almost killed me, another misdiagnosed me, others have missed major issues and one molested me. There are perverted doctors both male and female. If you don't believe it do a search on pelvic exams and you will find some x-rated descriptions of pelvic exams. I'm not talking about them describing the procedure in a cut and dry fashion but doing things on purpose to stimulate and humiliate their patients. I can fully understand the woman with the 40DD breasts for mine have always been a hassle since 4th grade. I'm scared and I know through research what to expect. My question is how do you find a doctor you can trust that is knowledgable, caring, and sensitive to your feelings? I am also scared because I have had a hellish time dealing with the medical profession over the years on behalf of my mother whom I take care of. I swear there is a secret pact between doctors, hospitals, nurses, and medicare to kill off anyone over the age of 65 as soon as possible.

-- Trudy, March 4, 2006

these stories are total BS you think the doctor finds pleasure in you being uncomfortable? Nothing in the exam is a big deal. Don't say the doctor traumatised me. You traumatized yourself. If something is bugging you talk to them. If people are on this site to find out about exams, this is all total BS. You should feel good at the end of the day that you got checked. Its worth it. If you talk to the doctor you'll be more comfortable. You build it up in your head and that freaks you out. No doctor would ever force anything on their patient. There are a few illegal exceptions but very uncommon. All this "it scared me" is built up in your head.

-- Realistic Person, March 10, 2006

I was sort of..no i was shocked but already in some sort of shock after an auto colision, where i broke my wrist and fractured an ankle to fing two female nurses (me male) insisted on catheterizing me when i did not have to urinate in a bottle right away,but not only this i was weak and in a standing position or leaning a bit on the gourney while it was being done.

wasnt this a dangerous position to have me in...say if i fell?

...i can see no reason why i was not laying down.

watch it guys!

who is minding the store?

signed,

auto accident in memphis

-- Anonymous, March 18, 2006

I was a victim of sexual abuse as a child and have always been apprehensive about medical exams by males (I am a male also). Now I go to female physicians as much as possible. My physician allows me to be completely undressed before she comes in so that I can become acclimated to the situation that I am in and it is not such a big shock when she enters. Usually I am pretty much relaxed by the time she comes in and she gives me time to cover up before the door is open.

-- anonymous, March 20, 2006

Hi!

I have never felt confortable wearing the paper gown. I like to wear a loose t.shirt and pants. Afterall, it's my choice what I remove and what I keep on.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2006

I have read far too many posts writen by women who went into a doctors office for a paper cut and walked out shocked that the doctor had them disrobe and internally examin them. I mean, it's your body afterall. Why are you questioning the exam AFTER it has happened? If you question the need for a given exam, point out your concerns before you strip. You have the right to refuse the exam. A good doctor will respect your choice and not pressure you or make you feel guilty for it.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2006

David, A complete history and physical examination of a new patient (first visit) or annually thereafter is a good idea, since high school and college-aged students are seldom examined carefully on a regular basis. Although you were being treated for allergies, conducting a complete exam not only checks the skin for infection, or other changes which can signal an underlying disease, but checks your lymph nodes (yes, those in the groin) for abnormalities but also testicular nodules (one of the most common causes of death in your age group after accidents and suicide). A complete history and physical is essential to a sound medical relationship with an allergy specialist, more so because allergies can effect any part of the body and other diseases may be present that could effect the treatment. This is especially so of high school and college students are reluctant, or see no need, for a complete physical on a regular basis. I have performed thousands of these exams (primary care/sports medicine) and find young people asking the same questions...why is it necessary. That's unfortunate.

Russell.

-- Russell, March 27, 2006

When I was a young boy I was somewhat shy. I went to a pediatrician until I was about 11 years old. When I would go in for physical the nurse would ask me to take off everything except my underpants and socks. She would then lead me out into the hallway to take my height and weight. I remeber being embarrassed because all of the people walking in the hallway could see me in my underpants (including girls). This only happend during a physical, during a sick visit (cold etc.) one need only to take off their shoes to get their height and weight taken.

However, I started to become chubby when I was about 6. My doctor apparently had some concern about my weight so everytime I went to the doctor, for a cold, a rash, etc. he had the nurse take my height and weight as though I was having a physical. So I had to undress down to my underpants and socks and take that dreaded journy into the hallway for all to see me so the nurse could take my height and weight.

This went on until I was about 9 and the doctor's office was remodeled and scales were placed in each room. I still had to undress but I wasn't exposed in the hallway.

It was a very traumatizing experience and I literally cried at the thought of going to the doctor - it was humiliating especially being shy and a little overweight.

It impacted me as an adolescent and an adult. I had high anxiety going to the doctor and felt very uncomfortable undressing in front of others (i.e. to change for gym) or even being asked to remove my shoes at a friend's house.

I have a great doctor now as an adult (20 years later) and have resolved those issues. But I still think that my doctor's practice of taking nearly nude childred into a semipublic area to weight them is a bad idea. I wouldn't let my children face that. Has anyone else had a similar experience?

-- Jake, April 7, 2006

I dont' know why so many girls are afriad to go to a male gyno. I turned 16 last November and within a month had my first gyno exam. My mom thought it would be a good thing to go to a young doctor who I could see for years to come and this one was in his late twenties. I was a bit scared, but it turned out to be not worth worrrying about. After I filled out all the forms I was called and on the way back to the exam room we stoped long enough for her to check my weight, height, and have me go pee in a little jar thing in a tiny bathroom. When we got into the exam room I thought she would tell me to take all my clothes off, but she didn't. She told me to take off my pants and my panties, but that I could keep my socks on and she told me to unhook my bra (I had a sweatshirt on)and she gave me a sheet thing to cover my bottom parts with. After I got everything on the bottom half off and covered and unhooked my bra I only waited a few minutes for the doctor and nurse to come in. He asked me a bunch of questons about my periods and that sort of thing and then had the nurse help me scoot down to the edge of the table and put my feet in the sturips while he put his gloves on. When all was ready he pointed a light between my legs, pulled the sheet up, and put a hand on each knee to spread my legs apart. When my legs were spred enough so he could see and work down there he looked things over and then did a speculum exam followed by putting his fingers in my vagina and then doing a rectal exam. After he was done with checking my vagina and rectum he helped me put my legs down and covered me back up. He then walked to the side of the table and asked me to arch my back a little so he could pull my sweatshirt up and examin my breasts. The whole examination took no more than ten minutes and he was very gental. I would have no problem with going back to this doctor.

-- Maggie, April 15, 2006

There is a double standard when it comes to nudity and members of the opposite sex in the medical profession. Females are encouraged to seek same sex providers if it makes them comfortable, males are lableled backward or sexist if they choose to do the same. Many of the same mind sets that justified prejudice and discrimination are at play in this issue. Lumping all men in a catagory and justifying different treatment of males as acceptable becasue of their gender is no different that the thought process that denied women equal rights in days gone by. Many men want and deserve the same consideration for thier privacy as women do, but are not allowed the same consideration. It isn't about what the health providers feel is appropriate, they keep thier clothes on, its about what is right for the patient.

-- Anonymous, April 27, 2006

I have a 17 year old daughter and she refuses to see the doctor. Partially my fault when she was 12 she said she would no longer go because she believed in "natural medicine." I agreed and let her be. But now I'm concerned my daughter was very obese weighing 267 lbs. She's only 5'0. Well in a matter of months she has lost a lot of weight and now weighs 85 lbs. She complains of sore joints and back. The condition seems to worsen at night its so bad sometimes that she needs a cane to walk from place to place, gets stuck on the toilet, and sometimes will just sit on her bed and cry. But she is admit about not seeing a doctor she said if God didn't want her to suffer she would be ok. I said that God made doctors and she laughed in my face. She thinks that this is a punishment from God. I don't know what else to do. Any ideas of what her condition could be, any ideas on how to make her see a doctor sort of dragging her? Please help!

-- Jane, May 15, 2006

THis is a message for MARTHA IN IL,

I've heard of 'well teen visits' but a breast and external genital exam in a teenager should be discussed before it is performed. A 16 year should be able to voice her concerns and decide which part(s) of the exam she is comfortable with. If she is not sexually active, these exams are not necessary. If she is, she should be the one deciding to have them.

-- Anonymous, May 17, 2006

i have never liked the doctor. my mom always got me a female doctor, and as strange as it sounds, they make me more uncomfortable. to me, if anyone is looking at all of me, it better be of the opposite sex. so when i was little, this doctor just started looking at parts of me that i didnt think would have to be looked at, and since i wasnt warned ahead of time, i was tramitized. now, i have grown up and i get to pick the doctor that i want. i chose a male doctor and he is wonderful. he respects my privacy and i am not embarresed to talk openly with him. most females know what youre going through, but i think males are more gental since they know its an uncomfortable position to be in.

-- Melanie, June 1, 2006

In this day and age of HMO's....I went for a annual physical exam the other day, the nurses seemed to do their part, but with the doctor and the exam, he never even checked my throat,ears, eyes, or anything. This was the first time I had ever seen this doctor, but this seems to be happening All of the time.

Last Dec. I went to a Dr. who I have changed, when I went to him, he told me to come back in the new year for the exam!!!! What the hell is happening to the health field???

-- Anonymous, June 10, 2006

For the past 5 years I have had numerous health symptoms and have seen just about every kind of specialist there is. I decided to become proactive in my search for the answers to my health problems. My father is a doctor which makes it easier for me to access medical information/resources. I learned how to auscultate my own heart with a stethoscope by reading and studying auscultation skills as well as listening to lots of heart sounds on CD's as well as on my computer. I have two heart murmurs that seem to be getting louder with time. When I visit the cardiologist, she does not take a lot of time when she listens to my heart with her stethoscope and she also listens to my heart over the gown or my clothes. I am overweight and also have large breasts which makes it more of a challenge to hear the PMI and the sounds at the apex. When I listen to my heart, I do it on bear skin and I lift my breast up so that I can place the stethoscope on my chest to hear the sounds of my mitral valve. My PMI and murmur radiate down into the upper left part of my stomach and around to my left side. I don't want to tell the doctor how to do her job but I am afraid she might miss hearing a heart murmur. How can I address this concern?

-- Julia, June 14, 2006

There is a double standard because men accept it.

I work in the medical field and i know that nurse like seeing guys naked.

especially if there young. I work for an ambulance co. and see it all the time.

If you bring in some old dude to the ER

you sit there and wait, and wait, till a nurse comes over and takes the report.

Last week i was called to a football field cause a young high school kid got hurt playing footall, he did'nt look to good so we transported him the the ER, as soon as we brought him in a bunch of femle nurses came over and asked me what the problem was.

There are some male nurses out there that are aware of this and i know that it bothers them. However you do run

into some that do not put up with this double standard crap. Last week i took a guy in his early forties for a angiogram

that's were a catheter is inserted in the groin and dye is injected through the catheter to rule out clogged arteries. Well the patient was very well built and also non english speaking so the doctor asked if i could translate for him. A couple female nurses and one male nurse came over and started prepping the patient. The male nurse took a razor and was going to shave the patents groin area when he looked over his shoulders and noticed the two female nurses standing there. He told them to leave that he would finish the prep. the patent lookded relieved that he did'nt have to be exposed in front of them.

Not all men get aroused being exposed in front of the opposite sex.

Nurses show no respect for male patients. Some are even disgusted with them.

The only way to put an end to this double standard stuff is for men to remember one thing! Your in charge of your health and if you feel uncomfortable with your settings you have the right to speak up! If they don't speak the language ask for a translator. Most hospitals and clinics have a list of people that speak most of the major languages. The reason this is not a big issue with women is because the don't put up with it!

-- Anonymous, June 17, 2006

"Guys its just skin after all. Trust me, once the nurses get home after a long day at work they have forgotten all about you."

It's not about the nurses, stupid. It's about the guys themselves. Men deserve the same "rights" as women when it comes to their own bodies.

You may have seen the world but you certainly haven't learned much about it.

-- Brian, June 30, 2006

To Dr. Olivia P:

Just because they don't say anything doesn't mean they don't have a problem with it. Men in our society are taught to not complain (which may explain why there is so much bashing of the guys on this site who do.)

Why don't you sincerely ask them. I bet you will be surprised.

And if nudity is no problem, why don't you perform your examinations in the nude?

-- Anonymous, June 30, 2006

Hi

Is this a common practice, when you make a appointment for a physcial exam.The doctor is usually not there and the physician assistant usually does the exam and gives whatever recommendations.

Worst case the assistant actually imporsonates the doctor, why should we pay for it then?

Aj

Chicago IL

-- aj , July 5, 2006

Look at it this way, I'm the one that scheduled the appointment to make sure I'm healthy from head to toe... to me undressing is just part of the exam. It's not I have anything that the doctor hasn't seen before. (Yes, I have a male doctor and I am male, but even if my doctor was female). Same thing with the "turn your head and cough" test -- all part of the checkup.... nothing to worry about, be ashamed about, or be scared about.

Most physicals should be just about the same... I'll admit, my doc is more in depth than most, but for those guys that are nervous about their visit, this is my experience:

-Sign in, fill out paperwork, sit down, wait for name to be called.

- Nurse calls me in. Go to exam room, nurse leaves for a minute, I take shirt and shoes off. Nurse comes back and takes me to get weighed and measured, lung capacity tested, eyesight and hearing checked, and to "fill the cup" (urine test). Go to blood lab, get blood test done. Back to exam room, nurse does blood pressure, pulse, temperature (and I found out) respiration/breathing rate. Nurse listens briefly to heart and lungs.

(Sometimes the nurse is male and sometimes female -- while I prefer the hot female nurses, it's all the same in terms of the testing done.)

Nurse leaves, I take off pants/jeans (boxers stay on). Doc comes in, talks a little, reviews tests from the nurse. Sometimes he rechecks blood pressure, sometimes not.

Doc checks eyes, ears, nose, mouth, throat. Checks skin, hands, etc. Listens to arteries in my neck. Listens to heartbeat and lungs sitting up. Lie down and doc listens to heart again, listens to stomach, abdomen, etc. Presses on stomach, checks kidneys, stomach, etc. Sit up, checks reflexes, legs, feet. Stand up, doc checks testicles, checks for hernia. Listens to heart and lungs again (while standing). Checks posture and back.

Sit back down on exam table.

Doc goes over results, then leaves. Get dressed, nurse comes back (if necessary) for any shots, then exam is over

- Go to main desk to pay, all done. Whole thing lasts about 30 minutes (not counting time in waiting room).

Nothing to be worried about in the least.

-- Anonymous, July 16, 2006

-About physical exams, it is great that schools provide health services for free, but the exams should not be mandatory, students/parents should have the chance to freely choose/authorize the exams.

-About the genital exams, they should NEVER be mandatory, that is inhumane and do more harm than do good. The doctor should suggest/persuade the student/parent to do/allow the genital exam, and if they choose not to, then their will must be respected. The doctor may ask key questions to try to determine any obvious/serious problem, and clear any questions the student/parents may have, and the doctor should persuade the student to think about doing the exam later, somewhere else, with a doctor of his/her choice, and should explain that is on his/her best interest to do such an exam, but never force him/her. If I have to choose between; be raped/abused/humiliated/permanently_emotionally_damaged and prevent a remote chance to have a noticeable disease, or not to be permanently_emotionally_damaged and maybe have some noticeable(only physical) disease that I could not see myself; then personally I would choose not to do the genital exam, that would be in “my best interest”. Many of those tests like breast and testicle exams can be done by themselves at home. Further more, children are very emotional sensitive, and must also be taken in consideration that they are very young and because of that never a stranger from the opposite sex seem her/him naked or touched her/him, especially inside the private parts, and the first time for that to happen should be with consent, and should be magical, and should be something GOOD to remember for life; there is only one “first time”. Children are a very special case, that is why if they choose to do the genital exam, it should be better for them to be with a doctor of the SAME SEX, and of their choice. I learned that most students feel very bad about the private part examination, both boys and girl are scared, they find it embarrassing and humiliating, and girls are emotional more fragile and often make them cry.

Those feelings are natural to Human Beams, and those feelings must be respected; to respect those fundamental feelings/rights must always be the priority if you truly are defending the children “best interests”, and if you are truly concerned about the children/teen wellbeing.

-- Fernando, July 29, 2006

Schools and doctors think that those exams can be mandatory, but I just found out that by LAW they can not be mandatory. Students and parents do not know their rights.

Just search the Internet for the keywords:

“Rutherford Institute” and “Stroudsburg” and “sixth grade”

Some of the girls wake up in the middle of the knight shouting “I said NO”, and the doctor say it is for the girls “best interest”!!!!!!

-- Fernando, July 30, 2006

I am a 23 year old female and I think gynecolgist (especially males) get a bad rep. for no reason. They know that no one enjoys having their most private parts displayed & examined, but it has to be done. My doctor always tells me exactly what he's doing and I find that helps me to relax. The fact is, girls should stop trying to terrify others and admit that even though the exam is a little embarassing, it does not hurt and it's over really quick.

-- Brooke, August 2, 2006

I'am concerned about my wife she is 33yr old woman who suffers from chronic Ibs and diverticulitis,She alway's see's her primary who has told her she need's a colonoscopy and see a Gi dr problem comes id only males take our plan and she was abused at a young age and dosen't feel comfortable with a male I told her I'll be there but not sure if me not forcing but pushing her is right idea The abdominal exam would be ok but if he wanted to do a rectal she will and not say a word wondering if a rectal was mandatory for abdominal exam I think she should have one but .don't like upsetting her if I say yes she will but surely will cause problems later switching my ins now so she can have a female,But takes 3 mths .should I wait or is a rectal just a possibility or neccessary routine part of a abdominal examine

-- Bill, August 5, 2006

I am 26 and I wrestled four years while in high school. Nude weigh-ins and nude skin exams come with that sport.

Our high school routinely used the dermatology residents or dermatology phyicians for the skin exams. Over half of those people were females. So that meant that you always stood a good chance of having a female do your skin exam. We on the team did not think that it was any big deal.

-- Trent, August 6, 2006

I have a primary care doctor who always feels the need to give me a pelvic. It's not always a complete pelvic, but at the very least an external exam. One time I went to see him b/c I had some lower back pain. I thought maybe I pulled a muscle from working out. Or pinched a nerve. The doctor didn't seem to think it was either of those, so he insisted on giving me a pelvic exam to rule out a bladder infection (or some kind of infection in there that could be causing pain). Another time I had Strep (sp??) throat, and he did a pelvic again to make sure I didn't also have a yeast infection. Can I tell him "No"? I mean, I'd like him to be thorough, but I'd also like to not have to show him my vagina each time I make an appt. And it's not creepy or inappropriate, b/c he makes a good argument about ruling out other possible causes for whatever symptoms I have. But on the other hand it gets very embarassing b/c I'm not prepared for a pelvic exam. It's like, I'm coming in for a sore throat, why the hell are you getting out the gloves???

-- Anonymous, August 11, 2006

To the 15 year old girl who posted as Anonymous on June 5, 2005; please post your email address here. You asked that people email you with advice, but you did not include an email. The exam you were subjected to did NOT seem appropriate, and I'm so sorry you had to go through that, and don't have your mom to talk to. Please if you read this, talk to a female adult that you trust, maybe a teacher or if you have a close friend, talk to her mom.

take care

-- Juli, August 12, 2006

A lot bothers me about the medical field. But my number one gripe is the stupid freaky doctors and nurses that love to use the word uncomfortable for painful. Get the dictionary out folks!

uncomfortable is sitting or standing in a certain position to long, etc. So your fixing to give a young patient a catheter(urinary) and tell them this will be uncomfortable. Huh!! Yeah right!!!!Stop lying, patients hate it! This is one of the reasons I want to get into anesthesiology. I actually want to take people out of pain(or should i start saying discomfort!)This is hard to say cause I know a lot of med. prof. personally. But sometimes folks in this field(as any other) are so smart they are stupid!

-- Robert, August 14, 2006

I'm both a medical assistant, and a phlebotomist. That said, I know how I want to be treated as a patient, but this has seldom been realized. I have lost the last half-dozen doctors I've been to, probably because my employer may be leaning on them to keep me working at any cost. I dunno.

In any case, my last two physicals have been less than complete. One of the doctors didn't really want to do the DRE, which I'd had at physicals since age 19, however he did do the GU exam, which was unremarkable.

Yes I had to undress (to my shorts), but I'm OK with it, because I'm now one of them. When I was much younger, I hated it. The nudity only bothers me when in the presence of the young, giggly, female assistants. The doctor, no.

On the first of those two physicals, no one could successfully draw blood from me. I even tried, but came to the realization that I was "dry" that day. An outsource lab did fine the next day.

One local physician's group that I've seen for the last two years has probably been the worst yet. The two doctors I saw there were rather cold, unfeeling, and non-communicative. That is not the way to treat patients, and keep their business. In addition, the staff there was unwilling to provide the correct documentation I needed in order to return to work, causing lots of problems.

That said, I have come to the opinion, even as a paraprofessional, that doctors just don't have the time to care anymore, because they're so intent on seeing the most patients in a given day as is possible, which, of course, results in the maximum amount of INCOME for the day as well. Oh yeah, the guys are impatiently waiting to tee off at the golf course, too. That's important, ya know !

Hey doctors, WAKE UP !!! Lose the robotic attitude, and try to put yourself in the patient's place, for one day YOU just might be the patient. I know you're overworked and underappreciated. Been there, seen that.

-- Paul, age 41, August 16, 2006

as a heterosexual male of age 37, i found it extremely uncomfortable that my female physician eyes were fixed and dilated for over one minute while she examined me. i resorted to seeing a therapist and the only comment that he had was that she was a woman before becoming a physician. my wife, subsequently, was treated so poorly by the physician that she came home in tears. i finally told my wife of the probable reason that she was treated so poorly. we both found new doctors.

-- jim rogers, August 22, 2006

I am a 50 yr old male and have to comment on both sexes seeing doctors of the opposite sex. When I was overseas I had a apt with a Dr Smith - the only english speaking Dr available. As it turned out it was a woman. I had severe intestinal problems and she was reported as being the best Dr around.

Being a third world country they did not use gowns - I was told to undress completely and given a hand towel to cover myself.

The doctor did the best overall physical I had ever had including a testicle exam (which no Dr had ever done before) and a unusually deep rectal exam (they have less equipment than in the US so some manual procedures are more thorough than you find in the US where there is more dependance on technology).

I found her to be very profesional and the best Dr I had ever seen.

When I returned to the USA I looked for a new doctor and found another female physician who also was excellent. Now I always look for a female physician first and have found generally they seem to give better care than many male physicians. My urologist is even a woman.

Now that I am over the initial uncomfortable stage of having a woman doctor I actually find it easier to talk to them than most male doctors even abouth things like ED and sex problems.

When I was about 23 I had a general exam by a male doctor and it was the second time I ever had a rectal exam. I got a hard erection from that exam - but 30 years later (and many rectal exams later) I am sure that he was gay and doing more than an ordinary rectal exam - it took was too long (over 5 minutes) even than even my exam overseas by the woman physician described above. This is another of the reasons I am much more comfortable with women doctors even doing testicle and rectal exams.

Now I am completely comfortable undressing and being naked in front of a doctor now. Yes, you can train yourself to get used to it.

Hey everybody - there are only two sexes and it should be no shock to you that a doctor needs to see your sex organs. The doctor either has a set like yours of has the "other" set often. There is no need to be embarrassed.

The one thing I have found sometimes seeing a woman doctor is that sometimes they don't do a complete exam such as a testicle or rectal exam of males. This is something that should be mentioned to her, or you should find another Dr.

As to having erections at a doctors office - it very rarely happens to me and the most embarrasing time it happened was during an exam for testicular cysts. The Physicians assistant was a young woman and I simply apologized saying that this was /not/ a turn on (I was in pain so I am sure it was not). It was just a physical response to the touching. She said she completly understood and told me not to be embarrased. I embarrased anyhow to be on the table with her examing my testicles and having a full blown erection, but we both laughed it off. She said it was not the first time it had it had happened in an exam and from her perspective she was not embarrased for herself - but because the man was usually so embarrased, she because uncomfortable.

I have an ED problem and had taken cialis the night before and was completly unable to avoid the erection. I could not masturbate before the exam because of the pain (which is why I was there!).

I asked one female physician what a guy should do if he got an erection during an exam - she said the best thing is not to be embarrased or ashamed or even hide it. Just stay calm and politely ignore it or make a light (non-sexual) joke about it.

Guys - if you know you will have to get undressed or have an exam that may cause you to get an erection - masturbate before the exam (in the bathroom not in the exam room!) Also avoid Viagra/Levitra/Cialis beforehand.

So... Go to the best doctor you can find. get completely undressed if necessary and don't be embarrased, even if you get an erection.

Women - same thing get the best doctor even if it is a male. Don't be embarrased if you get aroused or "wet" before or during an exam. Its natural and nothing the doctor has'nt seen before. My girlfriend also finds it best to masturbate before vaginal exams. She is more relaxed and less likely to get aroused and wet before the exam. (Even though she hates the exams she gets aroused easily).

-- Anonymous, August 23, 2006

i have had physicals before camp once and i immediatly was asked to take off all my clothes exept my underwear and my socks (this was at the camp) The nurse then did a basic exam (ears,mouith,nose,) Then she asked me to sit up on the table and she checked my heart and breathing then asked me too remove my socks and she felt my feet after this she made me drop my underwear to my feet and she felt my testicals and genitals i was wondering why you need to do this at CAMP: ''Why do i need to pee in a cup!? in front of the nurse she then asked me to get completely naked and to lie on my stomach on the table she then examined my butt omg is this normal pleasa help!

-- Anonymous, August 25, 2006

I went to a female doctor for the first time this year for a physical. I figure I feel more comfortable. Real nice professional doctor. I got a thorough exam from the waist up. I never received an exam of my genital area at all. I was told to go to a urologist if I was concerened. How is that a female doctor could be so shy. When I went to weigh myself, I asked to get undressed. I like to weigh myself nude. She went to get a nurse; no big deal. I was only allowed as far as my underwear.

I went to a female dermatologist. She was so courteious, she asked if it was ok she exam my genital area. I never had a female doctor do that so I was nervous. No problem. Second time I saw her, she had no problem examining a mark on my penis at all.

What am I a getting at? All doctors are different. Some are comfortable with the opposite sex and do what they do. Some are shy and make a patient feel like they are being robbed of a thorough exam.

Doctors need to be comfortable in general. Some people are shy and some are not at all.

They need to ask as I was asked to perform certain exams and be comfortable with it. If a patient does not want a certain exam, then that is it. If a patient wants a certain exam, if a patient wants to be nude on the scale they should be. .

-- Mr D, August 26, 2006

Why is everyone so afraid of going to the doctor? Don't we all want to be healthy and live long? Then just suck it up and go to the doctor and find out you're perfectly healthy. Remember that they are professions and have many years of training and the majority of the them, if not all of them, are pervs, but are just doing their job which they have many years of training. Consider how many years of medical school they had to go through. I think you can trust them. Just think. If the exam takes 45 mins, thats less than an hour of being uncomfortable while for the entire next year you can know that you are healthy.

-- nikki, August 28, 2006

It is about time men assertively raise their voice and stand up to protect their privacy rights. It’s simply appalling to allow female personnel EASY ACCESS to what should be an all male environment (specially regarding adolescents boys). I can’t possibly imagine male staff being allowed to witness and “stand around” while a bunch of nude girls is being physically examined. There is most certainly a double standard when it comes to privacy issues between men and women, but it is our fault as men for having allowed it to be this way.

We should simply refuse to take part in any situation that lessens our dignity as human beings, only then will we get the respect we deserve as a gender. Women are most certainly not going to protest the “status quo” (why should they?).

You must also remember that NOT ALL BOYS ARE SAME, while there are be those who are “rough” and less sensitive to being subjected to these type of “gang examinations”, there are also those who are extremely shy and sensitive (some just as much as girls if not more so).

-- Javier, August 31, 2006

I fully agree with those men who don't accept that a female doctor (Olivia here) declares that it is normal to make mass physical exams with men. She is implying that men are less modest than females. It is completely wrong! I am quite sure these mass physical exams for men by female nurses or doctors are often for them a secret way of revenge against males and of domination...

-- Jovan, September 24, 2006

Having read these stories I cannot believe that the American people are so gullible as to allow themselves to be treated in this way. In England we don't go to the doctor every year to have our genitals checked. We have regular pap smears but are in no way subjected to the embarrasment and humiliation of being trussed up like a turkey to have it done... Stirrups?! Fingers up your backside? Not on your life mate!! So can anyone explain how or why this needs to be done every year? Are the American people so different that their genitals change every year? In England most believe that any examination of this kind should be carried out as and when it is necessary for some particular problem and I believe that most of us would never allow doctors to treat us in such a derogatory way. And if you think that we have a higher percentage of problems because of this, then I'm sure that there are figures to prove you wrong. But if you really take some misguided comfort in thinking that you are safer for it, then you can't blame the doctors for taking your money and enjoying your embarrasment!

-- Anonymous, September 29, 2006

It took quite a while to read this thread and with apoologies in advance to those who have truly been abused some of this page is clearly sexual fantesy and some nudist promotion.

That said, I hoped you might like to consider another point of view.

I am a male, 50, and blesed with good general health. I have enjoyed a sports and military career, academic achievements and varied work situations as I've traveled in pursuit of my many interests. I've done all this inspite of my one phyiological problem, I suffer from hyper-sensitvity. Sun light, touch, clothing fabrics, dyes, sizing even bedding can torment me. Imagine your life if you had to go naked and no one wanted you to. Rather they wanted you confined to an institution so they wouldn't have to deal with you. I have a male doctor I see for work exams that rushes me through so HE and his staff don't have to see me. A female dermatologist who sees me naked because she knows my needs with no discomfort for either of us. A male allergist who has his N.P. see me most of the time because HE has a problem with my nudity and SHE does not. I'm never alone with the Company doctor or Dermatologist. The Allergist and his N.P. always see me alone. Seems the professionals have their issues too. If necessity is the mother of invention then desparation might be the father. Have a heart attack. Like me suffer reactive respiratory arrest. Have any trully life threating situation. Or, just a scary one, wake up in the night, alone, naked, short of breath and suffering effebrile (fever) tremmors. (It's like a pupet on a mad man's string and your the pupet!) Modesty, dignity or whatever you label it will fly from you. A naked ride down the stairs on a litter, dozens of people, ambulance, fire, police, neighbors, clerks, attendants, nurses, doctors seeing all and neither you nor they care. It's an emergency. All you think of, if you can think, is getting help. And they? Helping if they can.

Much of my life I've been a prisoner in this body of mine. Undressings at school were embarrassing. Undressing now is embarrassing sometimes. But do what you have to do. You'll get over it, or used to it if you make it a routine. You can learn to be comfortable and you can start in your home. There is no reason for a child to be ashamed in front of their parent of either sex, or their siblings. If your older it's a shame if you parents haven't shown you what to expect as you grow. In the house I grew up in bath time was a family affair. when the youngers are ready to learn they'll express the interest if they feel free to. Then lessons of respect and privacy can be taught too.

As an aside, there was an occaision when I colapsed while hiking a river trail. A warden found me, read my alert tag, undressed me and began washing me with water from the river. I revived before the ambulance arrived and waded out into the water to bathe. As I came out of the water a man and his daughter, about nine, came around the bend. The girl saw me and pointed me out to her father who calmly suggested she look somewhere else. "What else is there to look at?" (we're all so 'people' oriented at that age) "All the other wonders of nature" So just because someone else sees you naked doesn't mean they necessarily are looking. But does it really matter?

My older siblings don't share my affliction, some combination of genes, environment or pre-natal doping, we still don't know, got me. In truth I don't know another sole who has my exact syndome, if that's even the right word. But we are all different, and isn't it wonderful.

I suggest you all schedule an office consultation with you caregiver or clinic administrator. Spend a little time and perhaps money, and No, your insurance won't pay. Discuss the office culture, exam proceedures and all the details you wnat and they expect. Have a plan, Make it routine.

Every time you see a new doctor or receive a clinical exam for a new set of symptoms get examined at least once totally nude. The doctor needs to see skin colour, rashes, body type and structure abnormalities, mobility and gait (yea, you have to walk around a little) The nurses have either seen it all or won't know what they're seing until the Doctor tells them. Feel honored if you get to teach them something, I always do.

-- Michael, October 7, 2006

I had a pre employment physical for the first time at a "doc in a box" walk in clinic. The place was very unprofessional. One of the doctors discussed another patient right in front of me, telling the nurse than the man in exam room 5 was there for an STD screening, and did she know where the chalymidia kits were, as he needed to take a penal swab? Then, the nurse handled my urine samples WITH NO GLOVES. The doctor also made a condescending comment to me about my weight: "You have a few extra pounds" peering down at me over his glasses.

Being a woman who is 5"10" and 230 pounds I do not need to be reminded and embarassed about it. I sarcastically replied, "Really??? Come on!!" Wait! It gets better..during the alcohol test, I was given a mouthpiece to blow into, again nurse not wearing gloves, then she placed the used mouthpiece on the desk. UGH! What a gross place. Not surprisingly, I only stayed at the job 4 months, the job turned out to be a disappointment as well.

-- Anonymous in Connecticut, October 8, 2006

I was planning to get a physical for Basketball at school but after reading all of this I would be Scared As Hell.... therefore I think I will pass on the Basketball.... Im the shy type and I wouldnt care if I couldnt play a sport.... It wont kill me :)

~Age 16

~~Florida, USA

-- Anonymous, October 25, 2006